


Paradise

by Narcissisticpeacock



Category: Uncharted (Video Games)
Genre: F/F, Hurt/Comfort, Medicinal Drug Use, Serious Injuries, Shipwrecks, Unspoken relationship, commission, isolated community
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-22
Updated: 2020-05-20
Packaged: 2020-07-10 15:03:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 51,411
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19907677
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Narcissisticpeacock/pseuds/Narcissisticpeacock
Summary: Nadine knows the ocean isn’t friendly. She knows taking a job for underwater retrieval is risky. Trusting Chloe may be enough for Nadine to take the job, but it’s not enough for things to go well.Trapped on an island with Chloe injured, Nadine has to figure out how to get them home-- even if she’d like to stay in this quiet village cut off from the world.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Iammodesty commissioned me to write "any Chlodine at all", to sum up. So this is what I've made. Well, this is chapter one of what I've made. I'm coming at you fast and hitting hard, hope you're ready for a bit of angst.

“The Léaina?"

“Yup. Sunk in the Aegean Sea an incredibly long time ago. But with how water levels are right now, we’ll get access to the cave it’s washed up in.”

Nadine frowns. “Ships?”

“Yeah, one ship, I mean--” Chloe realizes the problem. The last time Nadine had gone for a ship had been for Rafe’s whole deal. Chloe knows the whole story. Nadine had left Rafe and the Drakes there to die; Chloe doesn’t blame her. The entire thing had been horrible. Whatever got Nadine out of it alive, that was what mattered to Chloe.

It's only logical Nadine is uneasy about this; treasure hunts that might involve pirates or the like. Ships aren't something she's fond of. It brings her back to one of her lowest points.

Chloe sets down the paper she’s holding and turns towards Nadine. She moves in close, setting a hand on her arm. "If you’re okay with it. Just you and I. No one else.”

She takes a deep breath. She knows Chloe will give up this hunt if she asks. It’s not just a power of veto, it’s a trust they have in each other. And Chloe might act a bit annoyed over it, but she’ll recover quickly and find them something else. If Nadine asks her to, that is. That’s an option if Nadine sees fit to take it.

But this hunt isn’t with Rafe. No Drakes are involved. She’ll be with Chloe.

So Nadine nods. “If it’s just with you.”

"Just _us_. And, hopefully, some treasure.” She winks. “I wouldn’t want it any other way.”

Finally, Nadine smiles and meets her eyes. “Me either.”

“You wanna know about the rest of it?”

A nod. “Ja."

"Alright, so, a long time ago, there was a Temple to Athena on this tiny little island. Apparently, it was all pretty humble except the temple where they had some nice and shiny jeweled statues. But, them being a smaller island, it didn't take much for them to be raided." She shrugs. "And well, Athena is the goddess of wisdom and _war_. The women fought back as well as they could. But still, they lost a lot."

Nadine frowns. "Should I assume the ship, the Léaina, has what they took?"

"Yes! The ship took their ill-gotten gains and started off, but they say Athena herself struck it down with a thunderbolt from Zeus." Chloe shrugs. "Whether or not that's what happened, I've got a location for it and… this."

She hands a paper to Nadine.

On the paper is a detailed sketch of a small statue, maybe thirty centimeters high. It's a woman in armor and draping fabrics. It’s Athena if Nadine had to guess. No wonder she’d struck the ship that had stolen it.

Chloe taps it. "Ivory and gold, not unlike the Athena Parthenos. But this one is manageable and worth millions."

"You think it's still on the ship?"

"Only one way to find out, yeah?"

Nadine sighs. "Chloe."

"Come on, China! This is a quiet job. We rent a boat and some scuba gear and we get what we need." She pouts a bit. "Promise we won't have competition."

It's a near thing, but Nadine agrees to it. Chloe tosses her arms around the woman.

"Lovely!”

Nadine heads over to where she’s got her laptop set up. “I’ll start on finding us a boat, ja? Are you trained in scuba diving?”

* * *

“Ugh, I love the ocean.” Chloe is laying on the back edge of their small boat with one hand in the water as they go.

Nadine looks back at her. Her gaze is soft. “This is a sea," she can't help but say.

“And what’s the difference?”

“Seas are smaller. Usually, they’re where ocean and land meet. They’re enclosed by land. The only exception is the Sargasso. It’s defined by water currents.”

“You have the nature facts, I’ve got the history ones.” Chloe shrugs. "Fine then. I’ve been proven wrong. I love the _sea_."

Sometimes Nadine feels like Chloe only pretends not to know things so Nadine can feel like she's sharing new information. Because Nadine knows Chloe likes to learn but also knows Chloe likes to make her feel good. She has no real proof Chloe actually knows these things; it's simply a gut feeling, but it's moot either way.

"Suppose that’s why you insisted on being the one to dive down there?”

“Definitely.”

“I want you to have your tracker on. I don’t like that you’re going down alone.”

Chloe chuckles and sits up. “Afraid sharks will devour me whole?”

“Shark attacks are incredibly rare. You’re more likely to be killed by a mosquito than a shark. Or a horse. Or a deer. But I digress. Diving alone is dangerous, especially in a sea or ocean. Maybe we should’ve brought someone else in.”

“So many animal facts, dearest. You teach me something new every day.” She looks up at Nadine and switches back to the matter at hand. “Anyway, there's a very short list of people you would trust enough to watch the boat as we went down and that list starts with your dad and ends at me. No one else is on it."

A frown. "Suppose you're right."

Chloe stands and stretches. She’s in a simple pair of shorts and a crop top. Nadine’s eyes linger over the exposed skin, all of which is tan from the first few hours Chloe spent reclined on the deck. Her smooth skin is nicked by scars in some places. Some, Nadine knows where they’re from. Others, Nadine still needs the story on. Either way, Nadine wants to get more acquainted with it all.

Chloe knows she’s watching. She turns with her hands still stretched above her head. Her back cracks and she drops the stretch.

“How long do we have til we hit those coordinates?”

“An hour.” Nadine turns back to the wheel of the boat. “You should go do your preemptive diving checks. Then put on your wetsuit and the rest of your gear.”

“Mmm. Sounds boring. I’d much rather relax up here. Unless you’d like to help me get dressed?”

“If you need help getting your gear on, I suppose.”

Chloe, all of a sudden, is leaned against Nadine’s back, arms looped over her shoulders. Nadine can feel her breasts against her back and Chloe’s breath on her ear. “I have to be undressed for you to help me _get_ dressed, you know.”

Nadine takes a deep breath and lets it out as slowly as she can. She has self-control. Even if Chloe tests the limits of it. “I’ll do your pre-dive checks. You take the wheel.”

“I’ll take _your_ wheel.”

“What does that even mean?”

“Must you think into every innuendo I attempt?”

“Think of better innuendo.”

Chloe grins. “Sounds like a challenge.”

Nadine rolls her eyes but smiles as she escapes Chloe's grasp and heads below deck.

She's still waiting on the day Chloe actually acts on the innuendos she uses so often. Nadine fears they're just jokes, but that fear pales in comparison to how she feels for Chloe. It gives her entirely too much hope that Chloe might feel the same way.

* * *

An hour later, they've reached their target. It's a shallower bit of the sea. If their equipment reading is right, it's no more than twenty-five meters deep here. Nadine is no expert at seas and the like. But surely the sea being so shallow here must mean there's land nearby, right? But the maps show nothing.

"Oh, china, I'm glad I brought my camera. I'll take as many pictures as I can for you. There's like… grass, but more crinkly, a whole field of it. Lots of colourful fish.”

“The “grass” is likely posidonia oceanica. It’s home to almost twenty-five percent of the species in the Mediterranean.”

“Ah, my partner coming through with those late-night wikipedia facts once more. Pity I don't have any Grecian facts to exchange with you.”

Nadine chuckles. “That wikipedia search was on the plane ride to Greece. You were snoring on my shoulder.”

“I do _not_ snore.”

She chuckles, watching the shape in the water far below. The water here is clear and lovely. She can see down plenty, though with little real clarity. She’s sure there must be some lovely sights down there, but they’ve made plans to scuba dive in Australia when they get a chance for a vacation. That’s surely going to be better than a quick trip down for treasure.

There's also been promise of some good zoos and the like on that trip. Nadine is excited.

"Any evidence of your wreck?"

"Not yet. But remember, I'm looking for a cave down here. Oh!"

Nadine tenses. "Oh? Oh _what_?"

"I just saw a stingray!"

"Stay away from it. They're dangerous."

"Yes, ma'am. Have any facts for me?"

Nadine has to think for a few brief moments. "Ja. It's got a venomous tail barb. Usually eats bottom-dwelling crustaceans or the like."

"Should I assume the tail barb is where it gets its sting?"

"Probably."

Chloe chats at her for a bit. She's got plenty of air left, and her talking means Nadine knows she's still alive. She's used to Chloe's chatter anyway. It's a warm and comfortable sort of thing for her at this point. There have been times she falls asleep to the warm tones of Chloe's voice. Now isn't that time; Nadine is focused on the job at hand.

"I think," Chloe starts, cutting herself off from her previous topic of Grecian pirates and ancient pottery shards. "I may have found our cave."

"How's it looking?"

"Seems clear. Well, the entrance isn't, but there's plenty of room for me just past all the-- what'd you call it? Poseidon something."

"Posidonia oceanica."

"Right, that. Tons of it growing here. But the cave is… Jesus, this is big."

"You're already inside?"

"Of course, China."

"Eish, Chloe. Be careful."

Chloe hums. "For you? Maybe."

* * *

“Can’t you be careful for yourself?”

Chloe grins. The mask does little to impede her sight. She loves being in the water. Swimming, boating, even just a bath. Whatever gets her close to it. Water is beautifully relaxing to her.

The cave is mostly dark, but a few shafts of light fall through cracks in the roof above. There’s more posidonia growing down here. She catches a glimpse of some silvery fish that dart past her and out of the cave.

“Shit.”

“What?” Nadine’s voice comes through slightly panicked.

Chloe knows the animal she’s looking at, but she can’t remember it’s name. She had seen it in a show she had watched with Nadine a few months prior. She’d fallen asleep during the program. “Hey, remember that ocean thing we watched. For the reefs? And there was that long fish thing. An eel? With a big mouth.”

“A moray? It’s probably a Mediterranean moray. Don’t move. Don’t go near it. It could bite and the slime on its skin is mildly toxic. We do _not_ need a trip to the hospital today.”

The moray is a couple meters away from her. It doesn’t seem to focus on her, but makes its way past her and towards where the little fish had gone. On it’s way past her, it’s tail just barely brushes her arm. Her wetsuit more than protects her from the slime.

“It… It’s gone now. Wish I’d gotten a picture.”

“I’d rather you not risk a bite.”

She pushes further into the cave. “So when we find this, love, Victor mentioned a job for us.”

“Thought you wanted to go to Australia. See the great barrier reef.”

“We can go after! Sully just needs us to distract a bit. He’ll pay well. He always does.”

“Chloe…”

“C’mon. You like Sully. We pick up a little extra money from him for flirting a bit with some mark he has and then spend it on each other.”

“If you’d like.”

“We don’t have to if you don’t want to, China. I’m not-- _Whoa_.”

Before her, illuminated by the beams of sun making their way down through the cracks, is a ship. It’s certainly from a time long past.

“Can you stop reacting like that and _tell me what you see_?”

“Found our ship, dearest.”

It’s in amazingly good condition for being in the water for a couple hundred years. Plants are growing off it, but there’s no real decay. The only damage is the burn from the top of the sail and down through the deck. Just below it is a hole in the side. It looks as though it would float if it weren’t for the hull damage.

“Eish. Just saying that… I can't see what you're seeing." She sighs. "Is it the right ship?"

"Well, it's greek, from the right time period, and in the place we thought it'd be. The only thing that confuses me is how well preserved it is. There's only the damage that made it sink. No real signs of rotting away or anything." Chloe runs her hand over a bit if it. "Feels sturdy too."

"Can you get into it?"

"Certainly. Maybe we'll find what we need, yeah?"

"Ja, hope so." Nadine swears. “We should’ve had you wear a video camera down. So I could see what you do.”

Chloe shrugs. “Hindsight is twenty-twenty, love. We can blame Nate since he’s who helped us get the boat and whatnot.”

“Works for me.”

Chloe peeks inside the hole in the belly of the ship. There are some remnants of barrels and boxes. Underwater plants are here as well. They fill up the space and give it an absolutely eerie vibe.

“I’m going in.”

“Be careful,” Nadine insists again. “I don’t want you hurt.”

“So _sweet_.”

Chloe hums to herself as she swims in. There’s no evidence of anyone else having been through here, but the water would wash away any traces in the sand.

She finds remnants of cargo, all empty. It’s no more than broken bits of crates and barrels. There’s plenty of wildlife evidence. She spots a few starfish, and some odd, tube-like creatures, and plenty of small fish. None are dangerous. No more stingrays or moray eels make an appearance.

“Does Greece have any decent wildlife reserves?” Chloe asks in way of conversation.

“Hm? Yeah. A fair few.”

“Want to take a day to visit one? While we find buyers for the treasure we’re certainly about to find?”

“Yes!” Nadine’s voice is excited at the prospect, but she reins herself in after. “... Yes. I’d like that.”

“It’s a date, love… I winked, but you can’t see me.”

She only hears soft laughter in response.

Searching farther in, she finds mostly what’s expected in a shipwreck. Bits of sea-life, remnants of what had been here. She finds a rusted bit of metal, but it’s long past the ability to be identified. She tosses it aside. Further in, there are a few coins. “Oh, old drachma. Should get us some nice bonus money.”

“Good.”

It’s in the darkest area of the ship that her light hits something shiny. 

She trains her light on it. The light reflects off, lighting up the area more. It’s partially buried, but she sees the face of a woman in an ivory carving. Though everything around it is covered in a green sort of slime, the statue remains untouched.

“China, I hope you're ready to expand our bank accounts a fair deal. We can certainly skip that job with Victor if you really want to-- This thing is gorgeous.”

“You found it?”

“Mhmm.” She’s busy digging into the sand around it. “It’ll fit just fine in the bag I brought. Might poke around a bit more and see if anything else survived. This statue is in an unbelievably good condition, so maybe I can find something else to fatten our pockets."

“Just--”

“Be careful, I know. I won’t check out on you early. Promise.”

It’s a casual promise, but Chloe knows Nadine worries terribly much. She has, as of late, tried to be a tad less impulsive to help out.

Not that Nadine would ever let anything happen to her if she could help it.

* * *

Nadine breathes easier when Chloe pops back up out of the water. She tugs her mask off and smiles up at Nadine.

“Well, hello, gorgeous. I brought you a woman.” Chloe tugs the statue from her bag and sets it on the boat before pulling herself up.

“I think I have enough trouble with just you.” Nadine helps pull Chloe back further onto the deck.

Chloe chuckles. “And who says I wasn’t talking about me?”

Nadine snorts.

Chloe starts unbuckling bits of her suit and dropping what she's done with on the deck. Nadine helps pull her off the oxygen tank and tuck it away. “There’s plenty of oxygen left if you’d like to take a dip.”

Waving away the thought, Nadine starts picking up the smaller pieces of the dive suit. “Né, thanks. We should head back in to shore.”

Chloe scoffs and rolls her shoulders. “We’ve got three days left on this boat rental, love. Let’s enjoy the sunshine. Which reminds me! I’m going to send a picture of our new friend to Elena.” She looks at Nadine, pouting a bit. “Sunbathe with me after I change?”

Nadine considers it. “Ah, no, but we’ll stay here a bit if you really want?”

“I do! I’d love to work on my tan while we’re here.” Chloe grins at Nadine in a way the woman is all too familiar with. “You’re welcome to rub suntan lotion on my back.”

“Maybe if you ask nicely. Go change, I’m going to bring us a bit away from where we found it.”

“Just in case?”

“Just in case.”

Nadine grabs the little statue and tucks it back into the shoulder bag Chloe had discarded.

That taken care of, she heads for the controls of the boat.

Again, Chloe's flirtatious attitude is putting her in a position where she wants to act but is all too aware of the risk. She almost prefers jobs where they bring in a third, if only because Chloe doesn't flirt as hard or shamelessly. But then she very much enjoys when its just them. With only Chloe, she feels comfortable and unashamed of who she is. She can speak her mind and receive no judgment. She's actively encouraged to share animal facts she previously found embarrassing.

Chloe is a goddamn gift. She'd do anything for her.

It's not long before Chloe pops back up on deck in a bright red bikini with a towel over her shoulder. Nadine is just sticking the statue back in the shoulder bag when she stops to gaze at Chloe.

"Alright, China. I intend to stretch out in the sun. Are you sure you don't want to join me?"

Nadine sighs. "For a bit, maybe. After I eat something."

Chloe hadn't been expecting that, it seems. She grins wide. "Excellent. Do I get to help you with your suntan lotion?"

Nadine rolls her eyes and heads below deck. It's a smaller boat, but plenty for what they need. She'd packed enough food for a few days and to avoid Chloe's whining, it's not all MREs. Nadine considers grabbing an MRE anyway but decides a sandwich would be better.

As she eats, her mind wanders. It doesn't need much for her to think of Chloe, a woman who's constantly on her mind.

They’ve been through a ridiculous amount since meeting each other. And maybe it’s because they’ve already thwarted death many times over and beat a warlord with their bare hands, but they’ve got a strong bond. At this point, Nadine can’t think of something she wouldn’t do for Chloe.

How much sway, she wonders, does the woman have on her at this point? Chloe can get her to do almost anything. What might Nadine sacrifice if Chloe asked her?

She's been thinking about it more and more lately. Because the more she's around Chloe, the more she wants to pull her close and kiss her. The more she's willing to take a bullet for her. Stop the world for her.

And with how often it's on her mind, maybe she should just goddamn act on it.

Take that risk.

Nadine heads back up to find Chloe already relaxing in the sun. She pops an eye open to look at Nadine. "There's room on this towel for two, you know."

Nadine rolls her eyes, but she still tugs her shirt over her head. She's got a bathing suit below, but no real interest in putting it on. Chloe will have to live with the shorts and sports bra combo Nadine has now.

Chloe doesn't comment, however, just scoots a bit so there's a good amount of towel for Nadine to rest on.

Nadine feels awkward for all of two seconds, then Chloe rests her head on her shoulder and lets out a soft hum.

"We need more jobs that go this well," Chloe murmurs. "Treasure grabbed and now I can relax with you like this. And we do _not_ get this enough."

"Ja, we don't."

"The trick might lay in just us, you know. No Sam bugging us, no Charlie waxing on about Shakespeare. Just you and me and this nice day."

"I like when it's just us," Nadine murmurs. The hot sun is making her feel lethargic. That plus Chloe beside her has her warm and happy like a cat in a windowsill.

"Me too, love. Nothing beats it."

Nadine lays beside Chloe, content where she is, until she drifts off to sleep.

* * *

Nadine opens her eyes to a grey sky. A cold breeze passes over her.

Chloe is dozing against her. As peaceful as she looks, Nadine hops up and shakes her awake.

“Frazer. Frazer.”

“Ngh, what?” She blinks and focuses on Nadine, rather than the darkening sky around them. “My last name? Again? We were making such progress.” Her voice is whiny and tired.

“Chloe,” Nadine tries again. “We need to get up.”

“Why? We were so comfy…”

Nadine’s eyes go to the horizon. “Think there’s a storm brewing. We should head back to land.”

“Ugh, fine. Not like I can tan with these clouds.”

“Go get dressed.” Nadine pulls her own shirt on. “I’m going to bring us away from it, try to get us towards the shore.”

Chloe disappears down below, her towel tossed over her shoulder.

There’s thunder in the distance.

Nadine frowns and brings up the GPS screen. Everything seems normal for a moment, but then the icon indicating their boat jerks to the side, then up, flashes briefly with it on land, and then back to the middle of the water.

“No signal” flashes on the screen.

Nadine feels the blood drain from her face, but she wouldn’t be a Ross if she didn’t have a backup. She’s got an echo sounder, as well as a backup GPS, and nautical charts of the area. Even her phone has various nautical navigation options. She came prepared.

Very quickly, it seems not to matter.

The storm must be whipping up the seabed, she assumes, as the echo sounder is having trouble. The other GPS has no signal as well. They’d drifted during their nap, so she isn’t sure where they are on the charts. Her phone has signal, but the app seems to have a hard time finding her location. It jumps between locations as though the boat is far wider than it should be.

She keeps her air of calm and does what she's learned from her time with Chloe. She improvises.

She can feel the direction of the wind around her and she can see the storm clouds approaching. She angles them in a diagonal away from the storm. The boat isn't as fast as it could be, but movement at all makes her feel better. She has no idea if they're headed towards land, but they have plenty of supplies, so all they need is a damn signal or calm seas.

Chloe emerges from below, now dressed in her signature red shirt and a pair of short-shorts. At any other time, Nadine would be treating herself to a look at Chloe’s legs, but right now is too stressful.

“That storm doesn’t look good,” Chloe comments. She’s looking back behind them.

The line does not help Nadine’s anxiety drop. “Ja,” is all she responds.

“Strange that there’s a storm at all. I know for a fact you checked the weather like ten times right before we left.”

It’s true. Nadine had done as she always does and checked all the conditions before they’d headed out. The sky was supposed to be clear for the next week. No evidence of storms, barely any clouds in the sky as it was.

“Take the controls for a moment,” she orders. “Just keep this way.”

“What are you up to?”

Nadine doesn’t answer, but she runs downstairs. When she returns, she’s got a plastic tub a little less than half a meter in height.

“What’s that?”

“Emergency kit. If we need it.”

Chloe frowns. “You think we will?”

“Hopefully not. Better to have it, though.” With another thought, Nadine grabs the shoulder bag that’s got the little statue in it. Hooking it over her shoulder, she takes back the controls.

“Anything I can do?”

Chloe’s being more serious; Nadine hopes that means she’s realized the severity of the situation. Being at the mercy of the sea will be much worse than the other things they’ve faced. Men, they can kill. Mountains, they can traverse. The sea can kill them in a variety of ways that are difficult to fight against.

Nadine has some practice in boating. Her father had spent time every summer with her on the water. It was never long, maybe a week at most, but she’d learned from it nonetheless.

This is entirely different.

And she’d practiced this sort of thing with her father, but never with such high stakes. She knows what she needs to do. But it’s not as clear for her as it once was and it matters so much more now.

Chloe is beside her. She’s relying on Nadine to get them out of this situation.

Nadine _can’t_ fail. Not when she has so much at stake.

* * *

The storm hits them hard.

Barely any time passes before the rain hits them. It starts out pouring before turning into heavy sheets of water. The visibility is down to nothing. The ocean around them tosses and turns, making the path Nadine is trying to take treacherous.

It’s unbelievable, she can’t help but think, how fast this storm showed up and how fast it’s overtaking them. They had been in the lead from the storm; they should have been able to get away before it hit. It's like the storm had aimed for them.

There had been no evidence of a storm forming, not for many more weeks. But this, this is like a hurricane. The storm seems to have no end in sight. No chance of letting up.

The waves rock the boat hard. It's not long before water is splashing onto the deck.

Nadine has already dropped the sea anchor, trying to increase the drag on the boat as much as possible. It's helped her control, but it's far from ideal.

She's got lifelines attached to both herself and Chloe. They need to either weather this or break free of it. Staying tied to the boat helps with that.

Nadine stays focused, tries to keep her footing, as wave after wave slams against the side of the boat. They show no sign of stopping.

Chloe is at her side because _of course_ she is. She should be down below, but she's insisted on staying at Nadine's side in case she needs help.

And she does need help.

They both do.

The waves are getting bigger, getting worse, getting stronger, no matter which way Nadine brings them. They rise higher and higher. It’s not long before they’re facing one far taller than their ship, illuminated by the lightning from above.

A wall of water crashes hard over them.

Nadine tries to shout to Chloe, only to see the spot she'd occupied empty.

Nadine panics.

She scrabbles for the lifeline attached to Chloe and follows it to the edge of the boat. Relief floods her when she finds Chloe, waterlogged but alive, at the end of the tether.

She pulls Chloe back onto the deck, checking her over as well as she can as the water washes over their feet. She keeps a tight grip on Chloe 's arm. Chloe gives her that grin Nadine is so fond of but infuriated by, but the no doubt _suave_ remark is drowned out by another wave hitting hard against their vessel.

There's the sound of something below them breaking. It is a loud, terrifying noise over the sound of the storm around them.

Impossible to see, Nadine goes pale.

They're sinking now, they've got to be. That had been the sound of the boat breaking. What else could it be?

She calls to Chloe. They've got to move; Nadine brought a life raft for this very reason. She refuses to bow in the face of this. They’ll get through this, they’ve got to.

Another wall of water crashes over them. Nadine feels Chloe ripped out of her grasp. And then another wave hits them.

When the water finally clears enough for Nadine to see, Chloe is just _gone_.

Again, Nadine scrambles to find her lifeline.

All that's beside her is a frayed, snapped cord where Chloe should be.

Frantic now, Nadine yells.

She calls for Chloe. She cranes her head, trying to see the flash of Chloe’s red shirt, to do anything to find her partner.

She screams Chloe’s name, again and again, until her voice is hoarse and the water is taking claim of the boat beneath her.

There’s no response.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, you all seemed to really enjoy chapter one! I'm glad I'm able to write things like it.
> 
> I'm hoping to mix up my usual in fics. And also, I've been told angst is part of my brand and I am going to lean into that.

Chloe wakes up.

Well, this makes no sense. Hadn't she just been drowning? Shouldn't she be… she has no idea. The afterlife stuff. Being reincarnated or something. Burning in hell, if her mother is right. Whatever.

She sits up and lets out a soft cry of pain. Every bit of her aches. Worse pain erupts when she tries to move her leg.

So Chloe stops moving and just looks around.

She's laying in a bed.

The bed beneath her is soft, the air around her pleasant. And around her is a charming, if rustic, cabin. It's barely more than a room. The walls seem to be made of some sort of adobe-like material. The door and window are wide open, letting in the breeze from the sea. There's a simple fire stove beside a clay oven. A table with some chairs is beneath a window on the far wall. Everything seems sparse but comfortable.

Where is she, anyway?

She pulls back the light cover that's over her and realizes she's in different clothes. She's in a simple formless thing, white in colour. It reminds her of a cross between a toga and a sundress.

Also noticeable are the cloth bandages she's gained. The worst of it is centered on her left leg, the one that had hurt terribly when she'd tried to move it. From her knee to her ankle is covered in bandages and splinted. Is it broken then? It's painful, but it doesn't feel like it's broken.

The rest of her is in pain too, though.

If she's made it, though, where's Nadine?

Pain or not, Chloe shifts to the edge of the bed. She's got to find out where she is.

She pushes herself up on her good foot-- which is a relative term, it seems, as it hurts to put weight there too.

Chloe attempts for only a second to put weight on her left leg. She lets out a soft string of swear words.

Awkwardly, she hops on one foot while using other things around her to balance. It’s still painful, almost unbearable, but she makes it to the door.

"Whoa."

Standing in the frame, she finds herself at the edge of a small village. The other houses all seem to be made of similar material as the one she's emerged from. Flowers grow up their sides in beautiful multi-coloured blooms. She can see the sea in the distance. There's some activity in the village. A gentle wind whips through, and Chloe hugs her odd garment to herself.

As picturesque as this place is, Chloe has absolutely no idea  _ where  _ this is. More importantly, she doesn't know where Nadine is. She refuses to think about the possibility of never finding her.

A voice catches her attention. There’s a woman rushing over to her from the closest house. She’s speaking in greek as she heads for Chloe.

Chloe’s greek isn’t amazing, so she only catches a word here or there. She manages to garble back some broken greek to let her know she doesn’t speak it well. She directs the woman to English.

"Ah. Yes, I've heard many out there speak this now. How are you feeling?"

The woman has some height on Chloe, which is fairly rare to run into. She's also got a couple of decades of age over Chloe. Her hair is dark, her skin tan. She looks greek. Chloe is not good at differentiating between separate greek places, but this woman looks to be, generically, from Greece.

"A bit…  _ achey _ .” It's an understatement. She feels weak just standing there. The leg she's got weight on is shaking.

"I am not surprised you are in pain. You had many injuries to tend to when we found you."

Chloe bites her lip. "Did you find anyone else? I-- on the boat, I had someone else. My partner. She was with me."

The woman frowns. Sadness appears in her eyes as if she's been asked this question too many times. "No… But… There is hope. There is much of the shore left to search. With evidence of your wreck, we have people searching already."

Chloe feels a tight knot of dread in her stomach. Nadine has to be okay. She has to.

"Were there many on your ship?" the woman asks.

"Uh, no. Just my partner and I. Nadine, she… she  _ had  _ to make it. She’s way hardier than I am.” Chloe tries to smile. “Guess we just have to find what part of the beach she washed up on, yeah?”

The woman mirrors the smile. “Of course.” It’s too obvious she thinks Nadine is gone.

Chloe doesn’t want to think about that.

“My name is Alethea. I am one of the leaders in this island. Often, it is left to me to greet and tend to those that find our shores; though it is more often they are found on them.”

“Ah, I’m Chloe. Chloe Frazer.” Found on them? Indicating more shipwrecks, surely. It’s not the most tactful question, she supposes, but there are others to choose from. “Do you not accept ships through here?”

“The sea and sky around us is treacherous. Rarely do people arrive here, and even rarer is it that they leave.”

Chloe raises an eyebrow, amused. “You don’t happen to call your island Themyscira, do you?”

Alethea laughs. “No. We are not a community of goddess-like women. There are men here, even if their number is few. No, we call this island, this place, Parádeisos."

It's a word that simply means paradise, Chloe knows. It's not an unpopular place name. She's been to one or two of the same before now. But she's never heard of an unapproachable island of the name.

“Paradise, huh? You know, you’ve got the option for Themyscira. You could just take that; no one would stop you.”

Again, Alethea laughs. “Our name has been as such for hundreds of years. Named by my ancestors and those she lived with.”

“Your, your family--”

Chloe, who had already been struggling to stand, nearly falls as her leg gives out.

Alethea manages to catch her, but only just.

“Easy. You are weak. We can talk with you sitting.”

“I-- Yes. Okay.”

Chloe’s body feels horrible. Her leg is the worst, but the rest of her feels as though she’s been pummeled thoroughly.

“Why, from the goddamn  _ ocean _ , am I this hurt?” she manages to say as Alethea brings her back to the bed she’d woken in.

“The waves.” Alethea looks sympathetic. “The waves tossed you, many times, against the rocks and sand as you washed up. You’re lucky; many die from those injuries.”

Chloe grits her teeth. “Usually I get a chance to prevent getting hurt-- mostly my partner yelling at me before I do something stupid.”

“She sounds like a smart woman.”

“Oh, she is. Smart, strong… Beautiful.” Chloe grunts as she gets comfortable, sitting up so she can face Alethea. “She’s most certainly a reason I’ve survived as long as I have.” She closes her eyes and takes a deep breath. “She  _ has  _ to be alive.”

Alethea turns away, towards the door. Chloe is all too aware she's avoiding that conversation.

“I’ll be right back, Chloe. You need to eat something.”

Left alone, Chloe looks over herself again. The bruises are worse than she’d thought at first. Only a couple have started to darken, but she can see the red marks where they’ll darken within a few days. Probably sooner.

It hurts, but she pulls away a bit of the bandage to see what’s beneath. She gets a glimpse of a nasty gash.

“We think it’s a bad sprain, as well as those cuts.” Alethea has re-entered the house with a dish of food. “Here. It’s goat and some vegetables.”

Chloe takes the bowl. It’s a simple earthenware thing, likely handmade.

She starts back on the question she’d collapsed in the middle of. “Your family. They’ve lived here a long time?”

“For many generations. From back when boats could visit as they wanted and we had visitors often.” She shrugs. “Things have changed much, so the stories say.”

This place seems interesting, but Chloe is distracted by the pain in her very bones. Moving at all makes it worse. Alethea seems to notice it. Or maybe she’d already planned to help.

“We are… cut off from the world. We do not have many of the modern advancements that the world has gained. But I can offer something to help with your pain.”

Chloe raises an eyebrow, skeptical. “And that would be?”

Alethea removes a small leather bag from her pocket. “We have a flower on this island that has some pain relief properties. Well,  _ plenty _ of pain relief properties. It will certainly make you numb to it for many hours. But there may be other side effects."

"Such as?"

"Forgetfulness. Not complete memory loss, but it will be harder for you to recall things while under its influence. You may be dizzy or unsteady on your feet. Or drowsy. Everyone seems to react in a different way to it."

Chloe purses her lips. "That seems strange."

"The gods blessed us with this flower long ago. Before the sea became too dangerous to traverse and our people were decided to stay on the island."

Chloe connects some lines. It's possible, but she's not certain.

"Your people… Those you descended from. Do you have a name?"

Alethea gives Chloe a curious look. “May I ask, first, if you are a scholar?”

Chloe lets out a half chuckle. “Suppose you could say that. My father was an anthropologist and I, well… didn’t follow in his footsteps. But I certainly have a love of discovery.”

“Knowledge is invaluable. The more you have, the better off you are." Alethea clasps her hands together and seems to deliberate her next words. “How familiar are you with the story of Odysseus?”

“As in The Odyssey? King of Ithaca can’t reach his home for ten years and experiences all sorts of strife while his wife and child fend off the suitors?”

“So you know it well.”

Chloe shrugs. “Well enough. I’ve read it once or twice.” It being mentioned leans Chloe towards her original thought. But she waits because she doesn’t  _ really  _ know what it means.

“It is recorded that long ago, before storms kept ships from us, Odysseus landed on our late sister island. They had been overcome by desire, or perhaps cursed, and fallen prey to the lotus. Odysseus kept his men from the same fate.”

“And this flower you have is the same? You’re the lotus-eaters,” Chloe fills in. She’s not judging them by it, but certainly, she’s curious on it.

“Some call us that, but I do not believe it is accurate. They may be the same flowers, but it has been a very long time and this island is far from where that island was.” She picks the little leather bag back up. “And we do not use this recreationally, which was their undoing. This is for pain relief only.”

Chloe has never been one for drugs. Ibuprofen or aspirin, certainly, but even in her youth, the thought of any true drug use hadn’t been her thing. She had, admittedly, had tried pot a couple of times, but she didn’t care for it. Made her feel like the whole day was wasted.

She knows that the lotus spoken of in the Odyssey had been opium. She wants no truck with that.

She can handle the pain, she’s certain. If she has to. But even thinking that she thinks about how painful it is to move right now and how sitting still is like pure torture to her.

“Could I think about it?”

Alethea nods. “Of course. It is your choice.” She returns the leather bag to her pocket. “I have books that our people have written on it, as well as books brought to us, that you could look at if you’d like. We were blessed to have a very skilled scientist wash up on our swords and he wrote much on it during his years here.”

“I  _ would  _ like to read about it.” She wants some sort of painkiller, so perhaps this might be a possibility if the nature of it is off of what she knows. Besides, reading might distract her.

“Eat your food. I’ll bring you the books.”

* * *

There's the sound of something scraping on rocks. Nadine feels a tug on the material beneath her, followed by more scraping.

Her thoughts struggle to form into anything sensical. It feels like ages before it hits her: the boat had sunk.

She opens her eyes suddenly only to be greeted by the bright yellow of her liferaft. She only just remembers deploying it and climbing in. She only just remembers trying to find Chloe in the tossing waves.

_ Chloe _ .

She's gone. The sea had taken her, ripped her from Nadine's arms.

A voice speaks to her. It takes a moment for her brain to process it. It's greek, and she understands the majority of it. She's being asked if she's okay.

Nadine blinks and tries to speak, but her throat is dry and pained.

Something is shoved into her hands and she's urged to drink, again in greek.

She refuses at first, words still garbled by the pain in her throat, but then the voice says water. She's assured it's just water.

Nadine drinks. She's never found water so delicious as right then. It's warm, as though it's been left in the sun, but it doesn't matter because she needs ever drop she can get.

When she finally stops drinking, she's panting. Her voice finally finds her. It's rough from overuse, but she can speak.

Nadine’s words come out in scratchy Afrikaans. She asks where she is, but realizes this woman probably doesn’t understand it. And it would make all the more sense for her to answer greek with greek, but the words elude her. There’s a chance English could work.

“Where… Where am I?”

"You are safe. That is what matters now."

She looks up to see a woman standing by the edge of her raft. She's tall with brown hair and dark eyes. Her skin is only a few shades lighter than Nadine's, but if Nadine had to hazard a guess, the woman is greek.

Again, she's urged to drink.

Nadine feels better with more water in her. The woman helps her climb out of the lifeboat and Nadine finally stands.

Looking down over herself, Nadine sees no evidence of harm. Physically, she feels tired, but not hurt. Still hooked over her shoulder is the bag with the statue in it. The statue.  _ Fuck _ , it feels so worthless now.

Nadine turns her attention off of it.

They're on the edge of a beach. The liferaft has been pulled up, out of the waves. The woman beside Nadine is half soaked, suggesting she'd gone in the water to grab it.

Nadine's brain still struggles with this all. She's still reeling only just at the edge of shock. Everything feels wrong right now.

Chloe can't be dead. She  _ can't  _ be.

"I am Phoebe," the woman greets. She's got a thick greek accent. Nadine has to look up to meet her gaze.

"I… Nadine Ross," Nadine manages to answer.

"You are shaken. It is understandable. I will bring you back to the village. You will find help there."

"The village?" she asks. She's obviously somewhere in Greece, judging by the woman in front of her.

"Parádeisos. It is small, but it is strong. There is nowhere else to go, besides. And I do not have the supplies to help you out here."

"What do you mean, nowhere else?"

Phoebe gives her an enigmatic look. "You have been washed up on an island. This place is protected by the gods. If you reach it, Athena herself has blessed your ship. If the tide brought you here, Poseidon himself spared your life."

Nadine looks around them. The beach is just that; a beach. It’s rather unremarkable. There is a large pile of driftwood nearby, but it seems to have been piled there on purpose.

A few meters away from them is the edge of a forest. It’s not sparse, but not overgrown. She can see oaks and poplars. Bright flowers can be seen growing off small bushes of knee height that spot the ground between the trees.

“Have you… Have you seen a woman in a red shirt? She… Eish, she would have… washed up.” Nadine frowns. She can still feel Chloe being ripped from her arms. She feels like she’s about to collapse.

Phoebe sets a hand on her shoulder. It steadies her, but only just.

“I have not. But there are many places she may have been found.”

Nadine is staring at the ground, barely listening. She should’ve insisted they head back to shore. She shouldn’t have fallen asleep. Chloe is gone and it’s her fault.

“Nadine. You must focus. I will bring you to the village. If she has been found, that is where we will find her.”

Nadine wants to believe that but she can’t. Every time she closes her eyes, she’s back on the sinking boat, screaming for Chloe. How could Chloe have survived? Nadine had only lived because she had a raft. Chloe… Chloe had nothing.

“Please, friend. I know grief is powerful, but falling prey to it will only make this worse.”

Nadine sighs. She’ll have to avoid thinking about it. If she can. Ignore the pain that’s hitting her for a second time now. The first had been when she’d first climbed into the lifeboat, where she had sat alone, unable to do anything about the horror around her.

Nadine looks up at Phoebe and nods. She doesn’t say anything. She’ll follow Phoebe where she needs to go. Other than that, she doesn’t know. She’ll deal with it later.

“Lead the way,” she says quietly.

Phoebe seems relieved. “Thank you.” She grabs the edge of Nadine’s lifeboat and pulls it further onto shore. “I will return for this later,” she explains. From there, she starts picking up the driftwood nearby. Nadine assumes she’d made the pile. Without thinking, Nadine helps with it.

“You should rest--”

With a shake of her head, Nadine picks up more. “Exertion helps me… not think.”

And she's certain her body will yell at her for this later, but she doesn't care. She doesn't.

Phoebe seems to allow that.

“The village relies on the wood that is collected from the beach,” she explains. “I bring as much as I can manage every few days.”

“You don’t live in the village?” Nadine’s voice is quiet. If she’s understanding correctly, this island is isolated from the outside world. Whether or not the Greek gods and goddesses protect it, she doesn’t know, but she can see the importance of resource management. Gathering driftwood means they don’t cut down their trees. But if this is an island, it seems strange that someone would choose to live away from the people of the village.

“I do not. I live alone but visit often. My duty to the island and to the gods keeps me separate from my people.”

Nadine isn’t sure how to respond to that. Chloe has always been better with history, which she’s certain the way of this island would fall under. She’s under the impression most of Greece is christian at this point. Chloe had mentioned some smaller sects still worshipping Grecian gods and goddesses, but no more than a small amount.

“Sounds lonely.”

The phrase is barely a comment on what Phoebe’s said. Nadine feels like she’s in a daze. She’s moving to move, not with any real purpose. She wants… for lack of a better phrase, Chloe. She’s aching for her partner. She wants to be back in Chloe’s flat, curled up beside her on the couch as some show or other plays on the television.

She doesn’t want to be thinking of that right now. She needs to focus on… she doesn’t know. Following Phoebe to the village?

“Perhaps at times. But there is rarely a day I do not see someone. My mother often visits, as do many other villagers.” She gives Nadine a short side glance. “Rarer, though, is it that I find someone on the shore. Most wash up near the village. The tides bring them there. I wonder, what is it that brought your boat to my section of the island?”

That’s another thing Nadine has no answer to. Again, she doesn’t want to think about the fact she’s washed up at all. She doesn’t want to think about the wreck or sinking or Chloe.

How is she supposed to be able to tell Chloe’s loved ones? Charlie, Nathan… How is she supposed to face Elena with that news? She’ll be wrecked.

But giving this news does mean she would have to get off the island first. She wonders if that will be difficult.

Taking a boat back, without Chloe, seems impossible.

“How far until the village?” she asks.

“An hour’s walk, but we will need to rest before we reach there.”

“I’d rather keep walking.”

“I understand, but you’ve endured much in the last day. A short rest will keep you from collapsing.” 

Nadine isn’t sure she cares if she collapses. Everything feels empty right now. Hope seems pointless. She wants to believe Chloe is alive and that they’ll be reunited soon, but it seems so unlikely.

Phoebe seems like she knows some of what’s going through Nadine’s head.

“Would it help, do you believe, if you told me about her?”

That’s something to consider, but… it’ll hurt. But Nadine  _ likes  _ to talk about Chloe. Her father has commented on it before, during her last visit with him. But Chloe is wonderful. A bit irritating at times, but who cares?

Phoebe seems to take Nadine’s silence as a refusal to speak. She seems genuinely surprised that Nadine speaks a moment later.

“She’s lovely,” comes her first words. “Absolutely beautiful. Funny too. Stronger than she knows.” Nadine sighs. “Stubborn and ridiculous, annoying too. But she’s... amazing. I’d do anything for her… In some ways, I already have.”

Phoebe is smiling. “You care deeply for her.”

“Ja. Ek is-- I need to find her.”

Hope is still scary. It will hurt far worse to get her hopes up. But she  _ needs  _ Chloe. What is she supposed to do without her? Treasure hunt on her own? Half of the treasure hunting  _ was  _ Chloe. Not the planning or discovery of what to hunt for, but Nadine’s enjoyment. Chloe is what makes treasure hunting enjoyable.

Phoebe hesitates in response, but changes the topic. “Might I ask what languages you speak?”

Nadine gives her a curious look. “I was raised with Afrikaans and English. But I can speak a few others. Why?”

“Many here like to learn new languages whenever possible. I do not believe Afrikaans has come to the island as of yet. You will be popular with the others.” She readjusts her grip on the load of driftwood on her arms. “Does your partner, Chloe, know many languages?”

“Eish, yes. She’s terribly smart.” Nadine can’t help but smile at the thought. “Hindi, Bengali, Urdu, Kannada… More than that. Her father taught her a lot. She wants me to teach her Afrikaans, but we never have the time.”

“She will no doubt be incredibly popular in the village. Knowledge is invaluable.”

Nadine appreciates the thought. But should she be hoping like this? The chance of Chloe being found is so terribly small.

That hits her again.

Chloe is gone.

She takes a deep, shaky breath. Maybe she shouldn’t be thinking of it.

But if Chloe is gone, shouldn’t she be remembering her whenever possible? Sharing her memories?

“She’s popular everywhere she goes,” Nadine manages. “We travel a lot.”

“What is it you travel for?”

Nadine wonders if treasure-hunting is something she should say. They avoid it around most people. But more often than not, they get things back to the original owners. The tusk had only been the beginning.

“We would… retrieve artifacts. Sometimes hired to, sometimes on our own.”

“Returning them to their rightful owners?”

“Usually, ja. Our first was for her. We didn’t know it at first, but… We got this artifact, this tusk, back to her people rather than sell it. She’s had a thing for repatriation lately. It’s good, I think.” She shrugs. “It makes her happy, and I can’t complain. Our rent is paid and we have each other. The treasure doesn’t matter.”

Saying that out loud surprises Nadine. But it’s true, she realizes after just a moment. The treasure doesn’t matter to her. It’s fun hunting it, but she finds it for Chloe. It’s not even for the money anymore. It’s for Chloe. The tusk had started the trend, moments after Chloe’s soft utterance of “we can’t let him get the tusk”. Now, Nadine will take the treasure wherever she decides, within reason.

“A noble profession."

Nadine is almost taken aback. "Never thought of it as noble. Usually, it's just to make money."

"And how much would you make if you sold these artifacts for profit rather than return them to their people?"

"Eish, not sure. Loads more than we've made so far."

"Then it is noble. You return these things home and take only what you need."

"I'm not sure if it's only what we  _ need _ , but it is far less than if we'd auctioned it instead."

"The artifacts are likely glad to be home. This tusk and whatever else; getting them to the right place is important." Phoebe gives Nadine a smile. "No matter what, it is good to connect the descendants of their creators with their roots."

Nadine nods. "That's why Chloe brought the Tusk back. She's Indian and she'd been raised rather far from it. She's embraced it much more now. What she said when she realized its importance… How the tusk was a symbol of her people… It was important to her."

"Were you still of a mind to sell it? If I am understanding correctly, that is how you were, yes?"

"Uh, ja. At least, until she… she said something. Didn't ask me about not selling it or anything. She just… needed to keep it away from the man trying to get it first." She shrugs. "It was important. And for her… I needed to make sure she was happy. That she got what she needed."

"Your connection must be strong. How long had you been partners at that point?"

Phoebe seems to be genuinely interested in the life Nadine has been living with Chloe. And speaking about her, about Chloe, is helping. It's strange. Chloe is a distraction from Chloe. It feels like it should be bad, but she really does like talking about Chloe.

"Eish… Technically, we weren't. We'd spent the last week together, but it wasn't until the end of that where we became partners." She takes a deep breath as she thinks on that moment. It had been warm and happy and Chloe had stayed firmly by her side the rest of the night.

They'd stayed firmly by each other's side ever since.

Phoebe is smiling. "A truly strong bond. The gods themselves couldn't break it."

Nadine hopes that's the case. She's feeling a bit better now.

They take a short break then. Nadine doesn’t outright oppose it, but she needs the movement to stay in a better mindset. Phoebe seems to know this, so after a few minutes and plenty of water shared between the two of them, they gather their driftwood and start walking again.

The village comes into view.

It’s far enough inland that storms likely don’t affect it much. The buildings are mostly one-story, made of some sort of brick, or adobe like material. Flowers like the ones she saw in the woods blossom everywhere. The village is colourful; bright blossoms against the off white of the house’s walls.

Phoebe brings her to a place to drop the driftwood.

“First, you must eat. I’ll bring you to my mother’s. It’s nearing dinner time and she is who those new to our island usually go to.”

Nadine just nods. She doesn’t have much to say for the moment. She’s equal parts starving and nauseous. Starving because it's been hours since she last ate. Nauseous because of the situation she's found herself in.

They reach a small house on the edge of the town. Nadine is brought inside where she can smell something mouth-watering being cooked.

Phoebe sits her at a table in the kitchen. There's a pot on a simple clay stove. She retrieves a bowl and fills it. "My mother is not here, but I know she would not mind if I fed you from what she's made."

Nadine is handed the dish, as well as a fork.

"Eat. I will go find my mother. She will be able to help you far beyond my capabilities."

"I… if I could ask a question. Asseblief. Before you go."

"Certainly."

She's not terribly certain on how to phrase it. "From what you said… It is hard to leave the island once you're here?"

Phoebe purses her lips, as if unsure how to respond. "That is correct."

"Does that mean there is no way to leave?"

She hums before frowning. "I think… this is a discussion for tomorrow. My mother would explain better." With that, Phoebe disappears from the room.

Nadine frowns as well. She'd hoped for just a "maybe" rather than a promise of an answer that is likely complicated. She’s not terribly certain what her future holds right now.

Previously, her future had not been certain, but she’d had some knowledge of it. So much of it had been tied to Chloe. She’d known her future had treasure hunting and crappy hotels and nights relaxing with her partner. 

Nadine finds it hard to think of what may lay ahead of her. If Chloe is gone, Nadine’s future is so terribly shakey. Nothing has felt like this before. Not even losing Shoreline.

But then, Chloe is much more important than Shoreline ever was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anyway, I am hitting you with a bit more angst, but I promise the next chapter will be happier.
> 
> Thanks for reading!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No heavy angst this chapter! Only light.

Phoebe returns just as Nadine is finished with her food. There’s a woman following her that is just shorter than Phoebe, which keeps her still a fair bit taller than Nadine. They look similar; Nadine assumes this is her mother.

Nadine stands.

“Mother,” Phoebe starts. “This is the woman. I found her floating in a life-raft not far from the library.”

The woman fixes her eyes on Nadine, incredibly curious by the looks of things. “I am Alethea. I am Phoebe’s mother as well as one of the leaders of this island.”

Nadine offers her a hand. “My name is Nadine Ross.”

Alethea’s eyes go a bit wider, but she shakes Nadine’s hand with no issue. “It is good to meet you.” Alethea glances her over. “You seem to be in good form. Tell me, do you feel any injuries on you? Scrapes, cuts, bruises. We must know in order to tend to it.”

Nadine shakes her head. “No. Not that I can feel.”

Alethea takes a slow circle around her. Seemingly satisfied, she steps back again. “Good. It is rare that we gain someone uninjured.” She looks around the room. “You have been fed?”

Nadine nods again.

“Excellent.”

Alethea turns to Phoebe. “I will need you back here tomorrow. Perhaps you can help our guests settle in.”

Phoebe dips her head in acknowledgement. “I will be back.” She looks to Nadine. “It was good to meet you, Nadine. I will see you at a later point.” She takes her leave then.

Nadine is alone with Alethea now. But before Nadine can say anything or ask any questions, Alethea motions her out the door as well.

“Come. I have a place for you to rest. And I believe you will enjoy what you find there.”

Nadine has no response to that. Food has made her feel better, but it doesn’t improve how the last twenty-four hours have gone.

She’s tired. The exhaustion is hitting her now, down to her very bones. Sleep sounds good. She’ll likely pass out as soon as she lays down.

As for enjoying where she’s being brought, she doubts Alethea has read her mood. She can’t see herself enjoying much. Everything in the last day has been more than horrible.

She wants to sleep.

And she sort of wants to stop existing.

Deep down, she knows this is a knee jerk reaction to her loss. The grief feels unbearable right now because it’s still fresh and bleeding. Every time she thinks about it for even a moment, it wracks her mind. How could Chloe, strong, adaptable, enduring Chloe, be gone? It doesn’t make sense. Her mind refuses to accept it, even if her common sense knows it.

It’s the first stage of grief. She doesn’t know how long it’ll take her to get to the second, but right now, it doesn’t matter.

Nadine follows Alethea.

They head towards a smaller house on the edge of the village. It’s smaller than most in the village and flowers have yet to climb the side of the house.

“Please, Nadine,” Alethea starts. “I know you have had much trauma in the last day or so. But I promise, it will get better.”

Nadine doesn’t know if she can believe that.

But then they reach the door of the small house they’ve been headed towards.

It's Chloe.

She's sitting at the edge of a bed in some simple white garment. Her hair is loose from its usual ponytail.

She looks up at that moment and meets Nadine's eyes.

"Nadine?" Her voice is soft and breathless.

Nadine sobs. The wind is knocked out of her and she can't help but cry as she dashes forward to her partner. She pulls Chloe in close as she lets out another sob.

"You're alive, you're-- I thought you were gone. Felt you go under…"

Chloe doesn't do anything but melt against her.

Nadine's voice is low as she murmurs in Afrikaans in Chloe's ear. It's all sweet nothings, all tender confessions related to how happy Nadine is at finding her partner. Chloe can't understand a word, Nadine knows. It doesn't matter. Chloe is alive. Chloe is in her arms.

She's vaguely aware that Alethea is still standing nearby, but Nadine doesn’t care who might be in the room; all that matters is Chloe.

Chloe, Chloe,  _ Chloe _ .

All at once, her plans, her support, and safety, all of it, snap back into place. Chloe is alive. It makes anything possible again.

Chloe buries a hand in her hair and lets out soft little shushing noises. Nadine realizes she's still crying, still sobbing against Chloe. She tries to quiet herself, but she can't. It’s not until Chloe pulls away a bit and kisses her forehead, then her cheek, that Nadine gets control of herself back.

"You made it," Chloe whispers. "You're here and you're  _ alive _ ."

Nadine nods, cupping Chloe's face in her hand. "I don't know what I would have done without you."

Finally, Nadine notices the bruises. And then she notices the brace.

"You're hurt."

"I… yeah. I got tossed around a bit."

Alethea speaks. "We found her on the shore. She would've been thrown against it many times by the waves."

"They… I can't feel most of it right now," comes Chloe's voice. "They gave me this pain killer… it helps."

Nadine then realizes Chloe does seem off. Not wholly. Just… a touch. Her speech is more airy, her eyes a bit unfocused. Whatever painkiller they've given her seems to be strong.

"I… I can't feel a thing, now. World is, is a little  _ wobbly _ , but that's fine. And now you're here, which means everything will be okay."

Nadine suspects the painkiller is lowering Chloe's inhibitions a touch. Not that she had many to begin with.

Chloe leans back in, face nuzzling against the side of Nadine’s neck. She takes a deep breath and sighs. “I’m so glad you’re okay.”

Nadine runs a hand through her hair. It’s down, loose and wild. Nadine loves seeing it like this; it’s so rare that she can. She wishes it were under better circumstances.

Alethea is smiling. The look on her face is soft and happy. "It is rare we get a reunion such as this. More often those that wash up on our shores lose everyone in the sea."

Nadine doesn't move from where she is. “When did you find her?”

"Last night. We treated what we could when she was out. Otherwise, she was asleep until rather recently.”

“What’s the worst of it?”

Alethea gestures to Chloe’s leg. “Her leg.”

“It hurt like hell earlier,” Chloe mumbles. She’s not really in the conversation, half dosing against Nadine.

“From what we can tell,” Alethea continues. “Her leg was caught between two objects, perhaps rocks, and ripped from it after. There’s some gashes, as well as a spraining of the joint. Her back harbors the worst of her bruises."

“The painkillers helped a  _ lot _ ,” comes another interjection from Chloe.

"They are strong, even in the small dose you were given."

Chloe just shrugs. Her attention is more on Nadine than anything.

"There was a time we were considered well known for this pain killer. People would travel far to receive its healing properties."

"I've never heard of this place," Nadine admits. She's still got one hand running through Chloe's hair. Chloe doesn't seem to care to talk, or perhaps she's falling asleep where she is. 

"We are hidden from the world. It protects us and allows us a quiet life."

"Like Themyscira," Chloe mumbles against Nadine's neck.

Alethea seems amused. "We are not amazons, but that is not far off from our set up. At least, we cannot be found on purpose by the outside world and we remain in worship of our gods and goddesses."

Nadine nods. "Phoebe told me some of it as she brought me here."

"I thought as much." Alethea looks out past the door. "The sun is beginning to set, and you both need your rest. You two are welcome to use this house as long as you need. We will discuss tomorrow what options you have here." Her eyes land on Nadine. “Tomorrow, we will discuss your opportunities on the island as Chloe recovers.”

Nadine nods.

“There are clothes in the dresser. You should be able to find something that fits you. You two rest. I will be back in the morning.”

“Thank you.”

Alethea excuses herself then.

Nadine and Chloe are left alone together.

Still running her hand through Chloe's hair, Nadine sighs. "I'm glad you're alive."

She feels Chloe's smile against her shoulder. "I told you I wasn't going to check out early." Chloe is as close to Nadine as she can be, except for-- “ _ What _ is poking me right now?”

“What?” Nadine looks between them and realizes she’s still wearing the shoulder bag holding the statue. She pulls the bag off and lets it fall to the side. “Sorry.”

“You still have it? Even after all that?”

“Uh, ja. Doesn’t matter though.” Nadine takes a deep breath. “You’re alive. Don’t care about the statue.”

“Miss me now, did you, China?”

“Ja, I did.”

There's a short pause before Chloe giggles against her. "You know? I think they may think we're a couple."

Nadine snorts. "What gives you that idea?"

"I kept calling you my partner, but never mentioned work… And they've given us this little house to stay in. Only one bed."

"We've slept in the same bed plenty of times. And we  _ are _ partners."

Chloe pulls her head back so she's looking Nadine in the eye. Nadine thinks, for a moment, Chloe is going to kiss her. But instead, Chloe leans their foreheads together and closes her eyes.

"Best partner a girl could get, China. That's what you are."

"I try."

They sit together like this for a few minutes. Nadine is just grateful to have Chloe back again. She doesn't care about what this may mean for them or what the islander's think. She has the woman she loves in her arms-- even if she hasn't shared that information.

Chloe yawns. Her ordeal has been worse than Nadine's, so it's not surprising she's tired.

Gently, Nadine lays her down in the bed before standing.

"Mm, where are you going?"

"Changing my clothes. I'll be back in a moment."

A sleepy grin spreads across Chloe's lips. "You could always sleep in the nude," comes the suggestion.

With a snort, Nadine pulls open the dresser Alethea had mentioned. "In your dreams," she jokes.

"Oh, darling, my dreams could never do you justice. Trust me."

A light dusting of pink appears on Nadine's cheeks. Chloe has dreamt about her that way before now? It's equal parts terrifying and intriguing.

"Well," she starts. "Maybe if you weren't hurt, you could make your dreams a reality. But let's not exacerbate your condition.”

Chloe lets out a soft groan. “That’s cruel, love. Teasing me like that.”

Nadine hums. “Not a tease, hartlam."

"It is while I'm hurt."

She digs through the dresser. The clothing is a mix of many different types. Much of it seems to be made of the same fabric Chloe wears, but there's a good deal of more modern stuff too. She finds a suitable pair of shorts and a loose shirt.

She doesn't hide herself as she strips. Before the shipwreck, she would constantly have to find a place to change in private, lest she face Chloe's teasing. Now? She doesn't care. Chloe can look as much as she wants because Chloe is alive and that's all that matters right now.

Chloe, however, is asleep when Nadine finishes changing.

Nadine smiles and climbs into bed beside her partner. Gently, she gathers Chloe up in her arms and pulls her close.

It's peaceful. There's the sound of the sea nearby, the easy comfort of being close, and the euphoria of finding Chloe again.

This is a vast improvement from when she’d woken up on the beach.

She has Chloe again.

* * *

Nadine wakes with a start to a hand grasping her arm. Her eyes shoot open and she's met with the site of Chloe laying on her back in bed. There are tears forming at the corners of her eyes.

Nadine sits up; she's all at once frantic over what she's seeing.

Chloe looks over. Her expression is pained. "Everything hurts," she murmurs. "I-- and I jostled my leg and bloody hell, China, it feels like it's on fire."

Nadine isn't sure what to do for all of a few seconds. But then she's up and out of bed. "I'll get Alethea. For painkillers."

"Please."

Nadine shoots off out of the house. The weather outside is pleasant, but she doesn't dwell on it. Alethea's house is the closest to the little one she's just emerged from. The sooner she helps Chloe's pain away, the better.

Alethea has only just woken, it seems. She answers sleepily but understands the hurry. It's barely two minutes between Nadine getting out of bed and Alethea returning with her.

"The day after is always worse," Alethea comments. "It's when your body truly feels the injuries you've received. And you have  _ many  _ injuries to feel."

Chloe manages to crack a smile. "You've got that right."

Nadine climbs back onto the bed to be beside Chloe. Her hand is grabbed almost immediately; Chloe squeezes as hard as she can.

"You cool?" Nadine asks quietly.

"Cool as I can be."

She looks up to Alethea. She isn’t sure what to say; she doesn’t have the resources to help Chloe the way she usually does. Back home, whenever Chloe was hurt, Nadine knew what to do. She knew exactly what to buy, how to use it, and how to keep Chloe comfortable. Often, if Chloe was hurt, Nadine was too. Never as severely-- a failure, in Nadine's mind. She should be able to protect Chloe better and take more hits. Chloe shouldn't be in this situation, Nadine should have been better, should have planned better, done something--

Chloe squeezes her hand and brings her back. She's looking at Nadine like she knows exactly what's on her mind. She rubs her thumb over the back of Nadine's hand. Her mouth opens a bit, but she seems to reconsider speaking for the moment.

Once Chloe has taken her medicine, Alethea excuses herself again, promising to return in a couple hours so they might get more rest before facing the day.

Chloe takes a deep breath. "Once this kicks in, I'd love for you to hold me a bit longer."

"And here I thought you were always the big spoon."

A soft chuckle leaves her. "I think I deserve some little spoon time after all this."

Guilt slams into Nadine again. "I-- you-- I'm sorry."

Chloe frowns. "That's… Nadine, you have nothing to be sorry about. You're alive and that's more important than anything." She shifts and grimaces. "If I wasn't the human embodiment of pain right now, I'd kiss you from sheer joy of it."

Nadine does have something to be sorry about, she is sure. Every injury on Chloe's body is a mark of Nadine's failure to protect this woman. It's tearing her apart, but she keeps her focus on what Chloe needs in this moment.

“Not sure what I would’ve done if you hadn’t made it,” Nadine admits in a soft voice.

“You-- That sounds familiar, did you say something like that last night?”

“Ja, probably. You don’t remember?”

“It’s blurry. Apparently this pain killer of theirs affects memory. Like… I remember you showing up last night, China, but not much around that.” She shrugs. “As for what you said… You’d figure something out. Without me? Treasure hunting on your own-- never falling into traps because of how damn prepared you are. Bringing back everything in tact. Rarely having to blow things up because you’re so damn smart.”

“Me, the smart one? Your painkillers must be kicking in.”

“Mm, they are, but you’re still smart. Who supplies me with endless facts about animals and… modern boat design, or anything military? Certainly isn’t Sam.”

Nadine frowns. “Just had to mention him, did you?”

Chloe chuckles and rolls herself onto her side, facing Nadine. “If not a treasure hunter,” she continues. “Maybe a park ranger? Or… maybe you’d go all The Most Dangerous Game but exclusively hunt poachers.”

“Wouldn’t mind hunting poachers.”

“They would cower if they heard you were in the area. Imagine how many elephant friends you could make then.”

Nadine smiles and settles back down beside Chloe. Facing each other, the only light from the rising sun outside, Nadine finds Chloe practically golden.

“I’d rather have a partner. Would rather have  _ you  _ with me.”

“What use am I with animals? You’re vastly more skilled there. I’d just scare them off.”

“We’ll have to stick with treasure hunting.”

Chloe must be feeling the effects of her pain killers, as she squirms her way into Nadine’s arms with no concern for pain. “Well, we’re both still here, so treasure hunting it is… After sleeping. And whatever else this place has in store for us.”

The last line causes a little bubble of anxiety in Nadine’s chest. She has no idea what to expect here. It’s leaning on the side of positives; both Alethea and Phoebe have helped them. They’re safe and alive, though not uninjured. Things could still go poorly. Nadine hopes they won’t.

But right now, she has Chloe, and together they can get through anything.

Nadine realizes Chloe has already fallen back asleep. She kisses her cheek and sighs. “Ek het jou lief, Chloe,” she says in the softest voice she can muster.

* * *

A few hours later, Nadine finds herself seated at the small table in their borrowed house. Alethea is with her as well. Chloe is just at the edge of the bed. It lets her be involved with the situation, but doesn’t force her to find a way across the room with an injured leg. Not that Nadine wouldn’t have carried her, had she asked.

“Parádeisos is a quiet place,” Alethea says. “Conflict here is rare in small scale and completely nonexistent in the grand scale. We have been self sufficient for centuries, from what we know. It is only by the grace of the gods that we have been provided with the supplies we’ve needed or the people to keep going.”

“We, of course, are careful with the resources on our island. Meat-- goat, deer, or anything else we may have-- is rarely consumed. Fish and other sea creatures are main staples of our diet.” She taps on the side of the table, thoughtfully. Her words are practiced, as though she’s had to give this speech many times. “We use much of the island for crops. We have a small olive grove, as well as a small apple orchard.”

“One thing we value here, above all else, is knowledge.” She gives them both a smile. “You both seem like smart women. The more knowledge you’re willing to share, the more popular you’ll be here. We have a library at the center of the island, furthest from the shore. The people that have ended up here for the last few centuries have donated to it. Most here know more than one language due to what they’ve learned at the library. Even those that leave us often leave behind some of the knowledge that they arrived with.”

Nadine jumps on that. “So people have left the island?”

Alethea seems to sadden a bit at that, but she nods. “Yes. Not every castaway enjoys life here, or stays when they do. There is much of the world out there. There’s plenty to miss, so I’m told.”

“What would it take to leave?”

“A boat, and a proper reading of the sky. But… I think I will explain that later. For the foreseeable future, I believe you will  _ have  _ to stay.” She gives Chloe a quick look. “Only one of you is fit for travel.”

Chloe gives Nadine a half grin. “Sorry, China.”

Nadine doesn’t respond. This is not Chloe’s fault.

“Might I ask how you came to be in the storm?” Alethea starts. “Phoebe mentioned you mentioned something about being in the art of recovery?”

Nadine shrugs. “As of late.”

“I’m not sure,” Chloe adds. “It’s really more treasure hunting, but I suppose most of it has gone back to the proper owners lately.”

“As long as I’ve been with you,” Nadine responds. “All but two of what we’ve found, I think.”

“Eh.” Chloe shrugs. “We’ve had fun and made some money.”

“Treasure hunting?” Alethea presses. “That does sound interesting.”

With a grin, Chloe nods. “I’ve been all over, but the best places, in order, would probably be Belur, Halebidu, and Shambala.”

Alethea’s eyes go a bit wide. “Shambala? The Buddist utopia?”

“Not sure if I’d call it that, but you’ve got the right idea. It was long before I met Nadine, unfortunately, but an adventure of it’s own. My ex did some stupid things, a friend got badly hurt… Not the greatest adventure I’ve had, no, but certainly exciting.”

“And the other places? Belur? Halebidu?”

“Much better. Our,” she motions between herself and Nadine, “first adventure together. A bit bumpy, maybe, but we got a lot out of it.” She shoots Nadine a wink.

Alethea takes a deep breath, as if holding herself back. “I would love to hear the whole story-- both of them-- when we have time. However, for the moment, I could give you, Nadine, a quick tour of our village? I would offer the same to you, Chloe, but we should not aggravate your condition as walking, even with crutches, would.”

Nadine looks to Chloe, who gives her a smile. “Go ahead, love. Tell me about it when you get back.”

Nadine isn’t terribly keen on that. Letting Chloe out of her site at this point would give her more anxiety than she could handle. “I could carry you. If you’d like.”

She catches Alethea smile a bit from the corner of her eye. Chloe, however, is grinning ear to ear.

“Oh, so you’ll carry me now, but not when we were in Guinea?”

Nadine snorts. “In Guinea, you faked a sprained ankle. Right now, you’re truly unable to walk. I’ll carry you, if you’d like to go. It’s no trouble.”

Chloe’s grin turns shark-like. “I would  _ love  _ for you to carry me.”

With a sigh, Nadine stands. “We going now?” she asks Alethea.

“We can.”

Nadine scoops Chloe up in one quick movement. She keeps her grip gentle. “We’re ready.”

Chloe rests her head on her partner’s shoulder. “So  _ strong _ ! Jesus, your muscles are amazing.”

Turning a bit pink, Nadine purses her lips. She looks at Alethea to lead them out of the house.

Alethea is smiling, obviously amused by this, as she leads them up the path to the main section of the village.

She gestures to a house they pass, the one Nadine had been fed in the prior night. “That’s my house. I don’t spend much of the day home, but should you need me, that would be a good place to start.”

They continue on, further into the bundle of houses. As Alethea had said, it is a quiet place. There’s some sound of talking, of animal bleats, and of birds singing, but there’s nothing of the modern noises both Nadine and Chloe are so used to. No cars, no planes… no mechanical clattering that’s so terribly normal in London, or Johannesburg, or any other place they’ve stayed in at any point in their lives.

Nadine enjoys it.

It’s reminds her, a bit, of the time they’d sat at the top of the waterfall in Halebidu. There had been nothing but nature and each other then. Even the pounding of the water as it hit the ground had been lovely.

Already, this place feels better to her than nearly any other she’s been. And she’s barely met any of the people.

Chloe is looking around, taking in every bit she can. Nadine has seen her like this plenty of times. Every time they set foot someplace new, she does this. She absorbs information as quickly as possible, finds things for them to exploit, and often spots traps long before Nadine does.

In this place, they have no need to exploit anything and the chance of traps feels incredibly low.

But Chloe, like this island seems to, thirsts for more information. Nadine is certain there’s not a day of her life she didn’t relish learning something new.

Alethea motions someone over. He’s an older man, perhaps in his late fifties, with a mixed complexion and dark brown eyes. “Ah, Tymon. Come meet the latest to find out shores.”

The man, Tymon, smiles at them. He offers a hand out. “Pleased to meet you.” His accent is similar to Alethea’s and Phoebe’s, but as though it’s mixed with something else.

Chloe shakes his hand, as Nadine doesn’t have the ability. “Same to you,” she responds sleepily. “I’m Chloe. This is Nadine.”

Nadine nods to him.

“It is good to see new faces. It is rare we get to find new people on our shores.”

“So Alethea says.”

He chuckles a bit and motions behind him. There’s a house, similarly built to the others here, but behind that is many trees stretching further back. “I tend the apple orchard we have. Should you have need of any, I’m certain we have enough preserves. It’s a couple months yet before harvest.”

“Apples are plentiful, come the autumn. Our preserves are a staple to the diet here,” Alethea adds. “Though apples are not the only option.” She gives Tymon a pleasant smile. “We will see you later, I’m sure. I must bring these two further.”

“It was good to meet you,” Tymon says as he continues on.

Alethea leads them further. “We have a couple options for our next stop. There is a small vineyard we could visit, or, should you like, you can see the animals we have in the barn.”

Nadine perks up at the thought of animals. Before she can even open her mouth, Chloe is already answering.

“The barn, if you don’t mind. I happen to know a certain someone loves animals.”

Alethea nods. “Certainly.”

She turns them down a side path that leads out of the village, rather than continuing into it. It would make sense for the animals to be kept in a more open space.

“What animals do you keep?” Nadine asks.

“Our main livestock are goats and sheep. They must be maintained well, but they provide most of what we need; meat, wool, milk. Some years ago, six cattle washed up. Four were able to survive, thank the gods. They are needier than the goats and sheep, but they give us more resources than we had before.” She thinks for a moment. “While they are not livestock, we do have some cats on the island. Some are strays, others are kept by those in the village. The strays hang around the barn, most often. They are useful for keeping rodents from our stores.”

“On a smaller island, what is it you feed the cattle? If resource management is important, such large creatures must be difficult to account for. They require more than twenty-four pounds of dry food a day.”

Alethea seems to enjoy the little fact Nadine has dropped, but she doesn’t comment on it. “They are a bit harder, but the sea provides for us what we need. We feed them what we can of the hay from our wheat harvests, but we add dried seaweed as well. They seem to thrive on the mix, as they’ve remained healthy since washing up on our shores.”

“Seaweed in a cow’s diet cuts the amount of methane they produce,” Nadine responds. “Not that four cows would have a negative effect on the environment. But some places are trying to get it added to the diets of dairy cows and the like, to cut down on emissions.”

“Animals seem to be a strong suite of yours,” Alethea comments casually. “We would love to have you record at least some of what you know to add to our library.”

Nadine blinks. It’s a strange request. She feels somewhat honoured by it.

“She could fill  _ loads  _ of books for you,” Chloe chimes in. “She may as well be the library of Alexandria in regards to what she knows on animals.”

“Chloe could fill more books than I ever could. History, rather than animals, but plenty more.”

Alethea is grinning again. “We would be honoured to have  _ both  _ of you record what you know. Knowledge is invaluable. We cling to every scrap we can get.”

Filling books seems like a daunting task. And Nadine-- she might not be eager to leave, but she knows Chloe must be. Chloe is the type to keep moving, to itch for adventure and their next prize. She doesn’t sit still, even when doing something calm, like watching a movie. Staying in one place too long seems to make her restless. It hasn’t hit her yet, Nadine knows, but once her injuries are healed, Chloe will want to leave.

Nadine has to be ready for that.

They shouldn’t be stuck her in the first place.

Chloe shouldn’t be hurt.

Nadine doesn’t realize they’ve arrived at the barn until Chloe catches her attention. She’s been too lost in the guilt that keeps hitting her.

“You there, darling?”

“Hm? Ja, sorry.”

“No need to be sorry.” Chloe kisses her cheek. “How ‘bout, instead, you give us some more cow facts?”

Nadine chuckles, carrying Chloe into the barn behind Alethea.

Inside, there’s a single cow munching contentedly at some plant matter. The back door is open, suggesting the other cows are outside.

“I might be able to think of some.”

Alethea is watching them, Nadine knows. It’s not a distrustful stare, just an amused look at the two people currently under her care.

Chloe grins. “Show off, love. I’m not the only one who likes your facts.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!  
> Don't forget, you can find me as Chloe-Gayzer on tumblr.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have had an absolute week. Nearly lost my progress on this chapter earlier, after posting it to the wrong story.
> 
> I'm going on vacation Sunday and I can't wait.
> 
> Don't forget to tell your local trans person they're wonderful.

The island is small, but Chloe tires before they finish the tour. It's just as Phoebe finds them that Chloe asks to be carried back. They’re sat just inside the small fences around the vineyard.

And Phoebe, much to Nadine's chagrin, flirts with Chloe. The line is smooth and complimentary. "Aphrodite herself must have blessed you, judging by the beauty I see."

Nadine tries to hide her jealousy-- not that she'd admit it is jealousy. But then Chloe sets her at ease and says to Phoebe "thank you for pulling my Nadine here from the water". That makes Nadine feel better.

“I did come to see if either of you would like to see the library,” Phoebe explains. Alethea is standing to the side, having just finished showing them the vineyard.

Chloe looks genuinely interested, but before she can say anything, she yawns. “I really would like to go,” she answers. “Love that crap. Libraries are always one of my favourite places to go.”

“If you can get her to sit still, that is. We’ve been kicked out of one or two.”

Chloe chuckles. “Mm, China, the ocean has already made it hard for me to fidget. And it wasn’t even a good library. It’s always ridiculous to have “banned books”. Especially history books.”

“We have no banned books in our library,” Alethea comments. “Knowledge is available to those who seek it.”

Chloe looks exhausted, but she still gives the older woman a smile. “I’ll take advantage of it when I can stay awake. For now, though, I think I need to take a nap.”

Nadine snorts. “That’s not far off from a standard day for her, but she’s got an excuse now.”

“Damn right I do.”

Alethea is smiling again. She nods. “Would you like a guide back?”

With a shake of her head, Nadine stands. “I know how to get back.”

Chloe lifts an arm, allowing Nadine to pick her back up. She settles into her arms comfortably. Chloe is no heavyweight; Nadine could carry her for a decent while before tiring.

Chloe seems to delight in this strength every time it’s shown. Nadine doesn’t mind much; Chloe is one of the first women she’s known to enjoy it rather than find her crass or too masculine. Nadine appreciates it. Even if Chloe might get a bit too handsy when drunk to pass as just business partners, but they’re past that now anyway.

“And you, Nadine? Would you like to visit the library?”

Nadine hesitates. She could, but leaving Chloe’s side makes her anxious. It makes no sense, but she feels as though parting from Chloe might tempt fate. It’s paranoia, really, that maybe finding Chloe was some dream, that maybe Chloe really did drown rather than wash up on this strange island.

Nadine frowns. This better not be a Lost thing. She’d like to think her own life wouldn’t have such poor writing. Purgatory, bleh.

“You should go,” Chloe pipes up. “Tell me all about it when you’re back. Maybe pick something out for me to read?”

Still, Nadine frowns. Does she really want to part from Chloe right now? It’s anxiety-inducing. It's  _ scary _ . She's certain if she steps away, Chloe will disappear. Just gone.

But she can feel Chloe in her arms, that solid weight and warmth against her. Chloe is here, Chloe is real, Chloe isn't going to leave her.

"Alright. Ja."

Phoebe nods. “I will find you shortly, once she is settled.”

Nadine turns away, heading back down the path towards the little house they’re staying in.

Chloe gives her a soft smile, which lessens Nadine’s frown a bit. "I'll still be in bed when you get back, I'm sure.”

“You’ve always been one for a nap anyway.”

A scoff. “Not in this sort of situation. An island unknown by the outside world? I would love to poke around here, sniff out what I can. How can an island survive on its own without running out of resources? How long have they been here?” She leans her head on Nadine’s shoulder. “Alethea mentioned  _ hundreds  _ of years. The island seems rather  _ small  _ for that length of time. How do they manage it all?”

Nadine shrugs. “Suppose that’s the mystery here, ja?”

“Exactly! A mystery but I’ve been beaten to hell and can’t move without painkillers. And then when I take the pain killers, I’m so damn tired that it’s no use.”

“I’ll see if they have any aloe to speed the healing process.”

“Please. There are so many things I need use of my body for; and not high off painkillers use, real control of myself.” She’s half nuzzled against Nadine’s neck. “The only benefit from this crap is now I get you in bed with me every night.”

Nadine snorts. “If you wanted that, you could’ve just asked. We didn’t need the damn boat sinking for that.” She pushes the door open to their small abode and heads for the bed. “Might’ve been harder when we’re at our separate apartments in separate countries.”

“We’ll just have to move in together,” Chloe jokes.

Nadine looks around the house. They’ve only been here a night, but they’ve been given this place to stay for the foreseeable future. “Might already be at that point.” She lowers Chloe to the bed.

“Ah, right. Still, China… You’re my favourite.”

Chloe is obviously still under the effects of the painkillers. This is the mushy Chloe that's maybe a bit less nervous about just outright stating things like that. This is close to drunk Chloe. Usually, something like the statement she just murmured out would be couched in three either vaguely insulting comments or something to downplay it-- something to distract Nadine from it. But on the medicine, Chloe has no such inhibitions.

Chloe holds onto Nadine so she can't stand back up all the way. She huffs. "Frazer, must you?"

Quick as a blink, Chloe tugs her down hard and kisses her. They meet almost too hard but quickly find a rhythm against each other. Nadine has to catch herself on her hands and finds herself half pinning Chloe to the bed. Chloe has both hands cupping Nadine's face, holding her close.

When Chloe finally relents, she lets herself fall back onto the bed with a grin. "Try calling me Frazer after  _ that _ ."

Nadine is half tempted to say it again and see what she does. Instead, she gives Chloe a long look. "Chloe," she speaks up. "I should go find Phoebe."

Chloe sighs. "Wish I could go with. But I'm maybe a minute from falling asleep… bring me a good book to read?"

"Of course."

“I'll be right here when you're back… Not that I could move or do anything if I wanted." She bites her lip and looks over Nadine. "And  _ jesus _ , do I want to."

Taking a deep breath, Nadine manages to give Chloe a hopeful smile rather than show how interested she is in the thought. "You'll heal fast enough, and then you can go back to taking risks you shouldn't just to startle me."

"Oh, I don't startle you on purpose," comes a smooth lie.

"We both know better than that."

* * *

The library is huge. Nadine can’t remember the last time she’s seen so many books. She and Chloe visit libraries often-- usually any with ancient books or uncommon books or  _ anything  _ with information on treasure they could hunt. Every single one pales in comparison.

“A goddamn library of Alexandria…”

Phoebe smiles. “The burning was a great loss to the world. But we keep good care of our knowledge here.”

This library is obviously old. The main section, where the door is, is  _ ancient _ . There are columns, the classical greek kind, holding up the outside of the main building. The building has aged well; there are no cracks, no chips. But there are some small areas that look as though they’ve been patched, but long ago.

The other sections of the building are all of the same adobe-like material that the houses of the village are made from. They were built long after the original section of the building if Nadine had to guess.

One thing Nadine noticed upon entering are the scorches on the inside of the oldest part of the building.

“This library has seen burning of its own, ja?”

Phoebe looks thoughtful about that, but she turns away. “A story for another time.”

She leads Nadine further into the library.

Every wall is covered in books. Tall bookshelves, most of stone, stretch high above. Nadine has a hard time spotting spaces that are empty. Some books seem as old as the island. Some are scrolls, some are bound in rough animal hide, others seem to be short things on stone tablets, even. There are more, probably from a century previous at least. She even spots more modern looking books as well, as if they’re only a decade old. She spots, here and there, books she knows to be recent releases. The ones she sees the most, though, seem roughly made, but all in the same way, neatly all bound in simple leather.

“Where do you get them all?” Nadine asks as she looks over the shelves. 

Phoebe brushes her hand down the spines of the books on the shelf beside her. “There are times we are lucky enough to find them repairable on our shores. Some we’ve had on our island for longer than anyone on it has been alive. We copy and repair as needed. But most, most come from the people who visit us.” She stops and turns. There’s a small cabinet before her. She opens it and gestures for Nadine to look.

The cabinet is full of more of those simply made leather-bound books.

Alethea had mentioned getting her and Chloe to copy down the things they knew, the experiences they’d had. The fact so much of their library are these same books must mean they’ve had countless people contribute.

“All of these are empty,” Phoebe speaks up, confirming what Nadine had guessed at. “When we gain a new person here with us, we ask them to fill what they can. Knowledge, it’s-- It is vital. It is what keeps us alive. We cling to every scrap, every  _ morsel  _ we can. And so, the people that join us-- we ask them to provide us with what they can.”

Nadine looks back around the room. There are hundreds of these journals. Not all the same, but in similar make to each other. The minds of many cover these walls.

“This is generations of work.”

Phoebe nods. “Not everyone has stayed with us. But some of the authors, those on these walls, have descendants here.”

Nadine reaches out and picks a book up at random. She opens it to find neatly written words on the homemade paper. She reads a short section; it’s a diagram of a bird. There are paragraphs of text beside it describing it and it’s behaviours.

Nadine soaks it in.

_ Peregrine falcons are crow-sized, the males being smaller than the females. Their colour varies with age and range, typically being a blue-grey on the above with barred underparts-- _

Phoebe catches her attention. “That was written more than a decade ago. The woman who wrote it left us after she finished it. You may borrow it if it’s of your liking.”

“I’ll look around first.”

“We have many options. We are working on translating them all to the languages we have here. It is likely you can find something here to suit you, as well as something for your partner.”

Nadine’s expression softens. Chloe is going to love this place. They’ll have to spend some time here before they leave. Reading is, traditionally, low energy. That’s what Chloe needs while she’s injured.

Leaving, though, she’ll have to ask about again once Chloe feels better. They’ve got time, for the moment. Chloe can’t even walk at the moment. And she could probably make some rough crutches if none are to be found, to help Chloe get around. Not that she can’t keep carrying Chloe around, but Chloe needs to have that freedom at some point. Probably after her bruises heal a bit, and that nasty cut on her leg.

“Have any good history books? Books on history or anything like it.”

“Any particular region or people?”

Nadine shrugs. “Chloe likes anything, really. Maybe if you have anything on India? Or anything that’s a bit less likely to be known… maybe different perspectives on things?”

“I’ll help you pick more than one out if you’d like, so she might still get her pick.”

“She’d like that… Might take her mind off the pain.”

Nadine searches the walls, examining much within her reach. Each book is penned in a different hand. Some information is mixed while other books are purely one subject. Occasionally, she’ll find ones with illustrations. There’s even a section that’s fiction, a mixture of stories written by the past inhabitants and stories that have washed up on the shores.

Nadine ends up leaving with her arms full. She’s got one or two for herself, but most are for Chloe. Phoebe, being familiar with the library, is a huge help. Nadine can mention a subject and a book gets pulled off the shelf and passed to her.

Nadine is excited to show Chloe her haul.

Chloe is still asleep when she gets back, so Nadine sets the books on the table. She passes a wistful look over Chloe's sleeping form. It starts warm, but then a seed of guilt blooms in Nadine’s chest again. Chloe is in a sorry state. Any bare skin Nadine can see has some evidence of bruising. With it all turning a deep purple, one or two going green at the edges, it’s hard to miss. Her leg is still bandaged as well. It’ll have to be changed shortly.

This shouldn’t have happened.

And deep down, Nadine knows she shouldn’t be blaming herself, but it’s hard not to. Her partner is hurt. Someone has to take the blame.

After finding a place for the books and leaving a couple within arm’s reach of Chloe, just in case, Nadine decides to find what she needs to rebandage Chloe’s leg. She hesitates at the door for a moment before returning to kiss Chloe’s cheek. There’s no reason to, but sometimes that sort of thing doesn’t need a reason.

Nadine finds Alethea by the well in the centre of the village. She’s speaking to a pair of children, probably no more than ten. They’re of mixed race as far as Nadine can tell, one with hair cut short, the other with tied back braids.

Alethea spots her coming over and smiles. “Nadine. You’ve returned from the library?”

“Ja. Brought some books back for Chloe, but she’s still sleeping.”

Alethea motions her closer. “Nadine, these are Urvi and Lindiwe. Two of the youngest on our island.” She looks to them. “Why don’t you try another language to introduce yourself?”

Without hesitation, one of the children-- Nadine isn’t sure if it’s Urvi or Lindiwe-- turns to her. And greets her in swati.

It’s surprising, but Nadine knows enough swati to get by. Men from all over South Africa had ended up in Shoreline; her father had wanted her to be able to effectively communicate.

She answers the greeting as best she can, but admits her swati is rusty.

Both children seem excited to get a response. They steal her in quick conversation for a few minutes. Lindiwe, the one with short hair, is excited. She asks Nadine where she’s from. The answer gets an enthusiastic reaction. She’s told how Lindiwe’s great grandfather had been from South Africa and washed up on the island long ago.

When she finally excuses herself from that conversation, promising to speak more with Lindiwe later, she turns to Alethea.

“Chloe’s leg needs clean bandages. I can change them myself, but I would need the supplies for them. I was hoping you might direct me to where I could get them.”

Alethea nods. “Of course. You are trained in medicine?”

A shrug. “Field medic at best. And I’ve had to tend her wounds more than once, this sort included.”

Alethea motions her to follow. “If you have any skill in medicine, we welcome it. We have few accidents, but it is always better to be prepared.”

“I agree.”

“The woman who typically tends to any injuries lives here,” Alethea says as they approach a small house. Just outside of it is a large garden. Nadine recognizes a plant or two. She’s got aloe growing, for example.

Nadine follows Alethea in. Inside, they find a small woman with dark brown skin dusted with freckles. She’s got her hair tied back in a rather messy bun, a flower stuck on the side of it. She’s sewing some fabric together when Nadine and Alethea enter the room.

Her eyes flash up to see who’s entered her home, but then she smiles. “ ‘Thea. Who’s this you’ve brought with you? We get another castaway?” Her accent is unrecognizable to Nadine.

“Yes. This is Nadine; she’s with Chloe, the woman you had to patch up when we found her.” Alethea motions to the woman. “This is Taliza, our own doctor.”

Taliza gives Nadine a smile and stands. “Good t’ meet you.” She offers a hand out to her.

Nadine shakes it. “And you.”

The doctor sets her hands on her hips, regarding Nadine. “You don’t seem hurt. Were you able to make it ‘ere unscathed?”

“I was.”

She smiles. “Good. Too many end up ‘ere with more wounds than we know how to deal with.” She’s a happy sort of woman it seems. She reminds Nadine a bit of Elena, but still very different. “I patched up your girl best I could. She awake now?”

“Ja-- well, she’s woken up. Asleep right now and in a lot of pain, but the painkillers are helping.”

Taliza gives a sympathetic smile. “My wife washed up near seven years ago now,” she comments. “Had a broken arm, some nasty cuts down her back, and was more bruise than body. But she healed up just fine. ‘M sure it’ll be the same for your Chloe.”

“It is Chloe who we are here about, in a way.” Alethea dips her head a bit towards Nadine. “Nadine needs bandages, so she might put clean ones on Chloe’s leg.”

“Ah, ‘course. It’s a good time t’ do it. I’ve got some with honey already prepared for her-- I meant to stop in an’ change it tonight.”

“Honey?” Nadine asks.

“A bit on the bandages will keep infection from settin’ in. We don’t have near as fancy as the things you can get off island, but we’ve found our own ways to keep healthy. This is safer than tryin’ to make our penicillin.”

Nadine has heard some things on natural antibacterial options, but she certainly doesn’t remember what those things were. If this island has survived this long, she’ll have to assume they know what they’re doing.

“Was wondering if you might be able to spare a bit of aloe, for the worst of her bruises. It’s hard for her to move when the painkillers wear off.”

“Yeah, I can swing that. You headin’ to switch the bandage now? I’d like to tag along for my own peace a’ mind.”

“Ja, I was, if Chloe’s awake.”

Taliza seems nice enough, and Chloe would probably like to meet more of the people on this island. At the moment, the number is small and Chloe has too much curiosity to be satisfied sitting in bed the whole time.

“I’m sure she’d like to meet you.”

Taliza smiles again. “Give me just a moment to clean up an’ I’ll be ready.”

* * *

Nadine returns to the little house she’s sharing with Chloe, Taliza right behind her. They find Chloe sitting up in bed; one of the books Nadine had left her is open in her lap. She looks up when they enter and smiles.

“Hello, gorgeous. See you made another friend.”

“Chloe, this is Taliza.”

Taliza gives Chloe a friendly smile. “Nice t’ meet ya. Properly, that is. You were unconscious when we met the first time, you having just been found on the beach. Feelin’ alright?”

“Ah, you’re the island doctor, I’m guessing? I’m feeling… well, like I’ve taken a whole lot of painkillers that I’m not used to, but other than that, fine for the moment.” She shrugs. “It’s a bit hard to focus, but I was told that’s normal.”

“It is.”

Chloe’s eyes go back to Nadine. “You get the doc so she can check up on me?”

With a soft hum, Nadine shakes her head. “Just needed bandages first, but you should probably be checked out anyway.”

“Well,  _ you  _ can check me out anytime you want, love,” Chloe purrs. She interrupts herself with a soft chuckle. “But I suppose I should get checked out by a doctor too.”

Nadine rolls her eyes at the comment, but she still smiles. This sounds like her Chloe. She wonders if the painkillers are wearing off. They seem fairly long-lasting.

“Let’s get to your leg, hm?” Taliza has already walked over to the table, laying out the supplies she’s brought. She seems amused at the obvious flirting between the two.

Nadine moves to Chloe and pulls the light blanket off from around the brace. 

Chloe moves her book to the side. Her movement seems stiff and lethargic. Like she’s starting to hurt again.

Nadine frowns.

Taliza has a clay pot on the little fire stove in the corner. “We need t’ wash it before we put the new bandages on,” she explains. “Lower the chance of infection.”

Nadine knows that, but she realizes Taliza is simply saying it to share information. It’s a small comfort, she supposes. Most of her patients probably don’t have the training Nadine does.

It doesn’t take long for the water to warm up.

Nadine takes care of removing the old bandage. She’s careful not to pull as she unwraps it.

Chloe is watching her, arms crossed over her front. She still looks tired, but it’s not the same way as before. Nadine focuses on the bandage for now. She’ll do her best to help once they’re alone.

The last of the bandage falls away. Nadine grimaces at what she finds there. There are three sizeable gashes, the length of her hand or more, all freshly scabbed over. They look tender and painful and inflamed. No wonder Chloe has nearly cried that morning after jostling her leg.

Taliza hands Nadine a cloth she’s dipped in the warm wet water. Nadine’s touch is gentle as she cleans around the wounds. This is far from the first time she’s had to do something like this for Chloe. The woman is accident-prone at best.

Chloe is gritting her teeth, trying to act unbothered by what Nadine is doing, but Nadine notices.

She’s no fan of putting her partner… Her girlfriend? Her lover? She has no idea where they stand now, but nonetheless, she’s no fan of having to put Chloe through this. They have no proper painkillers and no proper antibiotics. Nothing they have access to is even close to proper.

Chloe’s hands are in a tight grip on her blanket. She gives Nadine a small, surely  _ fake _ smile when their eyes meet.

“They’re wearing off, aren’t they.” Nadine doesn’t say it as a question. She knows the painkillers have got to be nearly out of her system after all this time.

“No idea what you mean, China. I’m right as rain.”

“I’ve brought more,” Taliza speaks up. “My Tessa needed them for weeks after she ended up here.”

“That your wife?” Nadine asks.

“Yep. I was still trainin’ to be the doc here. She was my patient for a long while. Still is if she hurts herself.”

Chloe smiles, this time for real. “You and Nadine have pretty similar jobs then. I know I wouldn’t have lasted this long without her taking care of me. Isn’t that right, China?”

With a snort, Nadine replies, “Take fewer risks, and I wouldn’t have to take care of you so much.”

“But I like you taking care of me.”

“You’re impossible.”

Taliza is smiling again. “You two are cute.” She takes a small pouch from the supplies she’s brought. “Would you like to refresh ya’ painkillers?”

Chloe makes a face. “Not yet, I don’t think. Rather be lucid for a bit before that, I think. Keep the world from being wobbly.”

Taliza seems to understand and sets the pouch on the counter. “It’ll be here if ya’ need it. Dose is already measured for ya’ too.”

Chloe thanks her, but it is interrupted by a soft gasp as Nadine brings the washcloth, gently, over the gashes.

“Jammer!” Nadine’s voice is the slightest touch panicked. “Didn’t mean to--”

“S’alright, love. It’s gotta get clean, yeah?” Chloe gives her a soft look.

Nadine is rather fond of that expression. She often receives it, even if she doesn't always understand why. Any warmth like that is appreciated from the woman she loves. Knowing it's passed her way in forgiveness for causing hurt doesn't make her feel better, really. Chloe shouldn't be in this state in the first place. She can't stop thinking that.

Taliza steps in and looks over the wound. She seems thoughtful, rather than truly worried about it. After a moment, she passes Nadine a dry washcloth. It's quick to dry the area than it was to clean it. Chloe sighs at the soothing touch of the cool bandages. Nadine wraps her calf well before returning the simple brace to her ankle.

“No puttin’ weight on that, ya’ hear me? We’ve got crutches for you, once your bruises heal enough for you to move.”

Chloe smiles. “Thanks. Til then, guess Nadine will have to put up with carrying me around if I’d like to go somewhere.” She tries to stretch then, but can’t move much before her injuries pull. With a huff, she glances out the door. “Don’t suppose you’d be willing to bring me to the bathhouse, China? I want to get clean.”

Alethea, during their tour, had shown them a small, rather ancient-looking building that was where most went to bathe. An utterly greek thing, a bathhouse, but cleanliness was and is important.

Before Nadine can answer the affirmative, Taliza chimes in as she starts to gather the rest of her supplies.

“We’ve got a tub you can use since you’re hurt. Easier than what we’ve got on at the bathhouse.” She looks to Nadine. “Tessa can help you get it down here, should you ask.”

“The less movement on my part, the better,” Chloe admits. “You don’t mind hauling it down here, do you, Nadine?”

“No. I don’t.”

“Might be best t’ have it brought down tomorrow. I’ll send Tess down in the morning to get you.” Taliza finishes packing what little she’s brought that wasn’t used.

“Sounds like a plan. Thank you, doc.”

She gives Chloe a grin. “Thank me when you’re better.” She tugs something back out of her things and passes it to Nadine. “I know it’s not much, but it’s what I’ve got. Should help a bit. Use it all if you need to.”

With that, she heads out.

Nadine looks at the little earthenware jar in her hand before opening it. Inside is a thick, handmade aloe cream. She moves closer to Chloe and shows her.

“We can help the worst of your bruises if you’d like. It's not arnica, but it should speed up healing a bit.”

Chloe grunts, shifting in her spot again. “I’d  _ love  _ that. Maybe then I won’t have to take this damn painkiller so much.”

Frowning, Nadine sits on the edge of the bed. “That bad?”

Another grunt. “Can’t tell how long it’s been. Messes with my memory too. I’m certain I’ve forgotten half of what happened on the tour Alethea gave us. Like, the bathhouse, I remember. Where we went after? Not a clue. Just that I asked you to bring me back here after.” She makes an attempt to move closer to Nadine but lets out a soft squeak of pain as she pulls at something new. Nadine moves closer herself.

“And then--” Chloe pauses, mid complaint. “The worst bruises are on my back, if you wouldn’t mind helping me out?” She fiddles with the hem of what she’s wearing, yet another loose shapeless gown as to make it easiest for her to move. “And maybe help get this off too? Then I’ll lay on my stomach so you can put the aloe on?”

Chloe seems uncharacteristically nervous for a question like that. Usually, she’d ask for something like that by way of flirting or as a challenge. Something like _ “well, china, wanna help me get my clothes off so you can finally get your hands all over me?” _ or similar.

Instead, she’s looking at Nadine, uncertain.

Nadine realizes Chloe is totally out of her element at present. She’s just down off of what can only be described as a high from painkillers and she’s unable to move without assistance. Any control she has in the situation is gone, leaving Chloe with damn near nothing else.

“‘Course I’ll help,” Nadine says quietly.

Chloe makes a soft noise in the back of her throat as Nadine gets on her knees beside her. Nadine takes the edge of Chloe’s gown and carefully tugs it up and over her head. It leaves Chloe in front of her, bare but for a simple pair of panties.

In any other moment, Nadine might be awestruck by her partner before her. At this moment, she can only be angry at herself.

Chloe’s body seems to be a battlefield. There’s barely any flesh that isn’t marred in some way by the beating she took in the water. Bruises in dark purples and blues blossom over her torso. She’s scratched too, in various places, some coinciding with bruises, others a nasty, irritated red on their own.

Nadine is pissed. How could she have let this happen? How could she let her partner, the woman she loves, endure all this?

“Nadine?” Chloe’s voice is soft. It anchors her, brings her back to the present.

“Ja. Sorry…”

“You cool?”

She’s not, she really isn’t. How could she be?

“I’m sorry, Chloe.”

Nadine’s meaning seems to hit Chloe then. She seems to see the guilt Nadine is subjecting herself to.

“What? No-- Nadine. Are you blaming yourself?”

Nadine scowls at her hands in her lap. “I should’ve done something. Vetoed the trip. Gotten us back to shore sooner-- not fucking _ fallen asleep _ ,” she spits. “Or even just held onto you better. You-- You’re hurt. All for that stupid statue. You could’ve died. You probably should of. The fact that we're here is all… it’s chance. Eish. Jammer, Chloe, I’m so sorry.”

Chloe reaches up to place a hand on the side of Nadine’s face. “Hey. None of that. I planned the trip. I convinced you to let us go ahead with the job. I got you to lay down with me on that towel, alright? Blame me, if you need someone to blame, but like hell should you blame yourself.”

With a tired look, Nadine gestures to the bed. “Lay down, Chloe. Let me get at your back.”

Nadine knows Chloe won’t be fooled by a simple change of subject. But she can’t help but blame herself and has no wish to tire them both out arguing over it. The stress would only exacerbate Chloe’s injuries.

Chloe sighs. “Alright. But you’d better stop blaming yourself.”

Nadine helps her over onto her stomach and frowns again. Her back is, visually, much worse than her front. Two healing gashes, maybe eight or nine centimetres long, are on one shoulder. The rest, centred higher up on her back, is covered with horrible dark purple bruises, all half swollen still. Nadine can see how they must be painful.

Nadine takes some of the aloe cream and, with the softest touch she can muster, begins to spread it over the contusions.

Chloe makes a soft groan, but it doesn’t seem to be pained. “Already feeling better, China.”

Nadine doesn’t respond, choosing to keep focused on her task.

“Tell me, China, if you don’t mind, did I imagine kissing you earlier? Or was I actually that lucky?”

That makes Nadine crack a smile. “You kissed me, ja.”

She huffs. “Damned painkiller, making me forget. That’s the type of thing I very much would like to remember. I thought I might’ve dreamt it.”

“Hm. Could always refresh your memory, when you need it.”

“Say it like that and I might be more forgetful on purpose.” She grins up at Nadine, cheek still pressed to the pillow. “Remind me now?”

“Ja,” comes the soft answer.

As Nadine leans down, Chloe’s hand darts out and captures the back of her head to pull her in faster. They meet, soft and sensual. Nadine is held there for longer than expected, lost in a world that is Chloe’s incredible skill of kissing. When Chloe finally lets her break away with a soft pop, the woman grins.

“I doubt either of us will forget that, eh?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! You can find me on tumblr as Chloe-Gayzer.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some plans are made and Chloe takes a bath.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am back from vacation and I am so sunburnt. And I wrote most of this on the drive down.
> 
> As a quick warning: there's a bit of sexual toned scene in this. It's not smut, but it's big ol' yearning. And I've just realized it's more than half the chapter, word count wise. Hm.

Nadine is restless. She has little to do now, on the island, besides ensuring Chloe is comfortable. But when her partner is asleep, which she tends to be at least half the day, Nadine has nothing to do.

She’s exhausted the many questions she’s had about the island. Some, Phoebe had answered, others had been answered by Alethea.

According to Alethea, the island is careful with resources-- _every_ resource. From the driftwood that washes up on the shore to the flowers that grow in their small copse of woods, they keep track of everything used and they do use _everything_. The life-raft Nadine had washed up in is being used to waterproof a silo. Some of the boat she and Chloe had sunk has washed up; it's just twisted bits of metal and wood. But all if it will be used. Recycling is the island's strength.

The storms that have been mentioned, though Nadine has trouble spotting any on the horizon, are apparently impassable at the best of times. Rarely are there breaks in this and rarely do people join the island community. It worries Nadine, as she would like to get herself and Chloe back home and to proper medical attention as soon as possible. Tales of people having left before don’t make her feel better. Maybe it’s anxiety, maybe it’s paranoia, but whatever it is, Nadine wants to get them off the island. If only for Chloe.

Despite the strange happenings around them and the less than lavish lifestyle, the island is comfortable. The people here seem to be happy.

Nadine finds herself enjoying it, despite herself. But she needs more to do. She enjoys her time with Chloe, but she aches for a proper gym. She needs a way to keep in shape. Carrying Chloe from location to location as she has would surely help, but that’s no solution.

Alethea finds Nadine sometime in the late morning. Chloe hasn’t woken up yet after taking her meds, Nadine is sure. She’d make herself known.

“Nadine.” Alethea sits on the step beside her.

“Ja?”

“I believe this has been the first time I’ve seen you without Chloe nearby.”

Nadine snorts. “We enjoy each other’s company.”

“I understand.”

She doesn’t dig into that comment or what it means. The island has been accepting of them. Even if they haven’t defined their relationship, only the blind or the painfully heterosexual would see them as something other than a couple. Nadine doesn’t really care what people see them as; what matters is Chloe's view and her own.

Admittedly, she doesn’t know Chloe’s views on it. But she’s certain it’s positive. 

“You seem troubled.”

She shakes her head. “Ne. Just restless. I went for a run, but it wasn’t as tiring as I would’ve liked.”

“You wish to remain active?”

“Ja. Usually, I go to the gym or something. I like to keep in shape.”

“If you would like something to do, I’m certain someone on the island could use an abled body woman to assist them.”

“What would the work be?”

Alethea shrugs. “Some need firewood cut. Others might need things moved in their houses. And Phoebe can’t always collect enough driftwood for us all if you would be willing to help with that.” She gestures out to the sea. "We need as much as we can get."

"I wonder how you get as much as you do," Nadine comments. "Our boat washing up makes sense. We sank near here. But the wood-- we're far from the mainland. How anything washes up, I don't know."

Alethea just smiles and leans back. "Our island already defies all logic, I believe. There is no reason we should have survived this long. There is no reason we should do as well as we do. No reason for the driftwood we get, or how plentiful the sea stays near us. And there is no reason Chloe should have survived to be found on our shores. But here we are. I have my island. And you have Chloe. There is no reason we should have either."

Nadine taps her fingers on her knees. "You believe it providence?"

Alethea dips her head. "Coincidence could not keep us alive this long. Though I will admit it could have kept Chloe alive, though it is unlikely."

Nadine shrugs. She's Jewish, born and raised. She is comfortable in her faith, but she isn't sure she believes _any_ deity would purposely interfere to this degree. But there's no real point in questioning it. Alethea is right. The island is surviving. Chloe is alive. From where they are right now, there’s no point in questioning it.

“I don’t mind helping out,” Nadine answers. “I’ve certainly got the time to.”

“Wonderful.” She glances back towards the house. “How has Chloe reacted to the medication?”

Nadine frowns. “She doesn’t like it. She isn’t a fan of the memory loss she’s had. Had to ask me to tell her some of the things that happened while she was under its influence.”

“That is common, I am afraid. It is why we control its use, rather than risk being an island full of forgetful people wasting away as we shirk our duties.”

“She appreciates the fact she isn’t in pain while on it.” If Chloe wasn't in that great deal of pain, things would be different, certainly. Chloe would’ve explored half the island by now. "She would much rather be out here. Explore your island. Was always one to hunt knowledge down.”

Alethea smiles again. “She seems like a kindred spirit. Perhaps the gods have brought you two here for a reason.”

Nadine purses her lips. “If they did, they could’ve done so without hurting her. Though I am thankful she’s alive.” She closes her eyes and enjoys the breeze coming in off the beach. “I wish we could be home.”

The other woman’s expression turns sympathetic. “I understand.” She hesitates. “Tonight. When Chloe is lucid, before she takes her next dose… Find me. Phoebe and I will discuss your options on leaving the island with you.”

With a blink, Nadine tilts her head, curious. She holds back her questions. “Alright. I’m waiting for Taliza’s woman to get me so we can bring the tub down. I promised Chloe a bath.”

“Tessa is a good woman. She’ll likely be down once she takes a break from her duties.” Alethea rises from her seat. “Find me when you’re ready and Chloe is lucid. And tomorrow, we will find you things to do to alleviate your restlessness.”

“Danke.”

* * *

It’s not terribly much later that Tessa arrives and Nadine helps move the tub down and into the middle of their little space. She’s a kind woman; she’s taller than Nadine and almost as muscular. Her dark brown skin suggests she’s got some sort of African ancestry, but they don’t chat about it.

The tub is a rather old looking metal clawfoot. It had apparently washed up years prior and hadn’t really needed repairs, so they had kept it as is. How it had gotten into the ocean in the first place was anyone’s guess.

It takes time, but Nadine fills it with hot water with some help from the stove. It’s much more work to put together a bath than she’s used to, but she welcomes the activity it takes.

She turns to Chloe once she’s finished. "Ready to get in?"

Chloe nods. She's on the tail end of her pain killers influence, but she's yet to really come to. No, right now she's still in, as she likes to call it, the “wobbly stage”. Where the world seems to be a bit more jello-like than it should.

"Help me get this off?" she asks in a low voice. It's not quite the husk Nadine expects, but it's close enough. It’s also, surprisingly, not used as some sort of innuendo. A healthy Chloe would’ve added something more risque, like a simple _“or maybe get me off?”_

Maybe she is finally starting to sober. Her lucidity seems much clearer than it had been ten minutes ago. And the pain might be enough to inhibit her penchant for flirtatious lines.

"How's your pain?" Nadine checks in quietly. She helps gather up the fabric of Chloe's outfit and slips it gently over her head. 

Chloe makes an uncertain noise. "Just coming back. Can we get me in that tub before it's too prominent?"

"Ja, of course."

Nadine has seen Chloe mostly naked before. Never fully, though. But as Nadine helps pull Chloe's underwear down and then, carefully, over the splint on her foot, Nadine gets to look.

Chloe is softer than Nadine, physically. Her hips are more full, her muscle less defined, and her scars less prominent. Nadine lets herself ignore the bruising for a moment to just _see_ Chloe. Her eyes travel down from her face to her breasts and to every little scar. The scars are nothing but flecks of lighter coloured skin against Chloe’s warm tone. Their time in the sun before the boat wreck has left her darker than before. She’s practically golden. And maybe Nadine is standing there too long, absolutely staring at the woman before her, but she can’t help it. She feels almost too lucky to have her here. Certainly someone else would deserve her more? Someone with a better past or someone who can handle the task of keeping her safe? Nadine tries, but she feels like she’s failing. And all these bruises and pain that Chloe shouldn’t have to endure...

She pushes the self-doubt out of her head and brings her focus back to Chloe. She’s gorgeous. She feels as though everyone else in the world must be blind; who wouldn’t fall for the beauty of Chloe once they’ve seen her? How has no one made to steal her away?

Nadine wants, very much, to touch Chloe like this. She has to remind herself she can’t.

Chloe gives her a half-amused look, but she seems perfectly fine with Nadine looking. More than fine, really. "I finally get to have you strip me and I can barely move for the pain. Fate is cruel."

The joke helps ease Nadine’s mind. She chuckles low. "We'll figure something out when you feel up to it."

Chloe lets out a near groan. "Don't tease me, love. I am absolutely dying here. With you looking me over like that and… _Mmm_."

With a sympathetic look, Nadine gestures to the tub. She has to be the focus for both of them right now. "You ready?"

Nadine _wants_ to give Chloe what she wants. She wants to give her that closeness, that pleasure, but there's not much in the way of solutions there. Chloe is hurt. It's not simple hurt, it's not easily fixed, it's injury beyond their current ability to treat. Healing will be slow. Healing will take more time than it has ever needed to.

And Nadine, she's always had a rather nonchalant relationship with sex. She enjoys it, certainly, and she has no issues sharing that with her romantic partners when she bothers to _have_ a romantic partner. She rarely seeks it out, but she knows it's something Chloe enjoys.

Nadine has no doubt she'll enjoy it as well, with Chloe. Chloe is gorgeous, captivating… Chloe is nothing Nadine expected to have, but she can't see herself living without her at this point. And maybe that's an intimidating thought when she puts logic to it. Maybe it's not something she ever expected of herself, this-- this dependence on another human being. It isn't even physical; it's emotional. Chloe has made so much of her life better and Nadine knows that too well. Losing her, something she's come too close to very recently, would revert her life back to what she hadn't realized was surviving rather than living.

Chloe hums. "Most definitely. While the water is warm."

Nadine slips an arm behind Chloe's back and another underneath her knees. It's no effort for her to lift Chloe up. Chloe is delighted by it, but she still seems like she's in pain from it.

"Sorry," Nadine murmurs to her.

"S'alright, China. You know I love your muscles." She pats Nadine's bicep. "Can't wait to get my hands all over them."

Nadine lowers her into the water, careful to keep her bandaged leg out.

Chloe lets out a pleased sigh. "This feels lovely. Jesus. It's amazing." She hums again. "Only one thing could make this better." She drags her eyes down Nadine's form. "Any chance I could convince you to part with _your_ clothes? You've undressed me, after all."

Nadine isn't sure how much she wants to give Chloe right now. It's certainly possible to go too far or maybe tease too much.

She meets Chloe's eyes. She seems lucid. Nadine already knew her pain was coming back.

All of her clothes is too much to part with now, she decides. But a shirt, she can do. She tugs it off so she's there in her sports bra.

"There."

Chloe bites her lip. "Ngh, that's a good start. Do I get to see more?"

Nadine chuckles. "Not right now." She glances over Chloe. With one injured leg hooked over the rim, the rest of her is mostly submerged. "I'll get you the soap."

Chloe nods and closes her eyes, leaning her head back. "Mhm."

Nadine heads over to the small counter beside the stone stove and picks up another small earthenware jar she’s been provided. She brings it back over and opens it for Chloe.

“Here.”

Chloe makes another soft sound as she reaches for it.

“Is the pain getting worse?”

“Yeah. But I don’t want to take more painkillers. Not yet.”

Nadine nods. “You can’t besides. Alethea wants you lucid when she stops by in a bit.”

“Hmm. She say why?”

“Ja. She says she and Phoebe have things to discuss us leaving.” She shrugs. “Hopefully we’ll be able to get you to a proper hospital with the right supplies. And then back home.”

“Only if you’re coming home with me,” Chloe murmurs. She’s got the soap in her hands but she’s yet to start using it. Her head is tilted back with her eyes closed.

“Of course. Not sending you back to your flat alone, not when you’ll need the help.”

Chloe peeks one eye open at Nadine. “Well, that, but I’m already attached to having you in my bed at night. However would I sleep if I didn’t have my big cuddly teddy bear with me?”

After a moment’s consideration, Nadine leans down and presses a chaste kiss to Chloe’s lips. “You’d probably sprawl out, not having someone to cling to.”

Chloe snorts. “Fair. But who would I steal the blankets from?”

Nadine notices how she’s yet to actually start cleaning. “Do you need help?”

Chloe opens her eyes again. “It wouldn’t be too much for you?”

It would be a fairly large step past what they’ve already done. Before now, there’s been no reason for this sort of thing. The most contact they’ve had like this had been the night prior when Nadine had rubbed aloe onto the worst of Chloe’s bruises. She’s taken care of her before, by way of injuries, but none of that was ever so intimate as this likely will be. Nevertheless, Nadine would do this. As long as Chloe is comfortable with it, Nadine will do it.

Nadine meets Chloe’s gaze. “No. Would you be okay with it?”

Chloe’s grin is accompanied by a small chuckle. “Dearest, I think I’ve had that fantasy before. I would most definitely be okay with it.”

Nadine blushes a deep pink but she grabs a bit of cloth to use as a washcloth. Without saying anything else, she takes the soap and pulls a chair closer to the edge of the tub.

“Let me know if I hurt you.”

“What if I want you to?” comes a low husk.

“Eish.”

Nadine takes her hand and brings the washcloth up her arm. Chloe’s eyes close again as she leans her head back.

“Absolutely torturous,” she murmurs. “I hope you won’t be this much of a tease when I’m healthy enough for sex. I mean-- teasing is fine occasionally. But jesus, you’re gorgeous.”

Goosebumps raise as a tingle passes down Nadine’s spine. Chloe’s want is obvious in the tone of her voice. She continues with the warm washcloth, bringing it up and over the back of Chloe’s neck.

“Focus on healing,” Nadine responds.

As much as Nadine would like to sleep with Chloe, she’s not about to risk her health. There are options, certainly, but for now, Chloe wants to be clean, so that's the focus.

Chloe leans into her touch and occasionally lets out a quiet noise, but it never seems to be out of pain, so Nadine continues.

There's a real reaction when she has to pass over Chloe's breasts; Chloe goes tense and let's out an unintentional moan. She pushes her luck and cleans there slowly. She brings the washcloth over the top before, with some light pressure, goes underneath them. She, through the cloth, palms Chloe’s breast and feels her hardened nipple as she brushes past in the name of getting her clean. She does the same to the other breast only a moment later.

When she’s done, Nadine is slow to pull away, but only because Chloe's hand has a strong grip on her wrist.

"You should kiss me," Chloe croaks out.

Nadine does. She's not about to deny that invitation.

Chloe holds her there for a solid minute before releasing her again. "Alright… Keep going. Promise I won't interrupt again."

A snort. "Wasn't an interruption when I was egging you on. But the water will get cold if we do that too much."

"You could warm me up again…"

"Chloe."

“Not my fault with _you're_ teasing.” Chloe sighs and leans her head back again. "Wish those painkillers didn't mess with my memory. Then I could just take some and absolutely ravage you."

Nadine's blush flares back up. She’d just fondled Chloe and still the woman can get a blush out of her with a few short words. "Thought they made the world "wobbly", ja?"

"I could handle wobbly if it let me touch you."

"Hm. Just relax for now. I'm yours as soon as you can move without pain."

Chloe settles in. She makes herself easy to move so Nadine can get to her back and whatever else is needed. Nadine has to be as gentle as possible when it comes to Chloe's ribs; she's certain at least one is cracked, if not more. She'll have to keep an eye on them.

Chloe is still _reacting_ to Nadine's touch. It's driving Nadine a little crazy, in all honesty. She admits some of it is her own fault.

Nadine knows she could provide some sort of relief to Chloe. As long as Nadine is gentle, she could most certainly get Chloe off at least once. Most likely more, knowing her.

Nadine takes a deep breath as she brings the washcloth over Chloe’s uninjured calf. She follows it with her own hand, bare skin on skin.

It’s an option. She could offer that. It would focus on Chloe listening to her and keeping as still as she could. And listening might not be Chloe’s strong suit, but if she agrees…

Nadine sets the washcloth aside and moves behind Chloe. Chloe still has her eyes closed and her head back. Her breathing is steady; she seems to be focused on enjoying the bath without absolutely losing it.

She brushes Chloe’s hair back, off her shoulder. The touch draws a sharp gasp from Chloe, but she keeps her eyes closed.

Nadine leans closer until she’s right by Chloe’s ear. “If… If you wanted, I could… take care of you.”

Chloe tenses, as if she’s not quite sure what Nadine means by this.

Nadine presses a soft kiss to the inside of Chloe’s neck, where she’s just brushed her hair away. “You’d have to stay still,” she murmurs in a husky voice. She feels Chloe’s reaction first, a sort of shiver. She hears it next, realizing Chloe’s breath has sped up just a touch. Nadine brushes a hand over the back of Chloe’s neck, gathering her hair in her hand, and kisses the same spot she just had. “I could touch you… Help release some of that tension. If you wanted.”

Nadine scrapes her teeth, lightly, on the same spot she had kissed. Chloe lets out a deep moan and seems to _shake_.

"I-- Nadine, you are _torturing_ me right now."

Nadine chuckles but pulls back enough so Chloe can think again. "Just giving you an option."

Chloe takes a deep breath and lets it out in a stutter. "I… I want to say yes, Nadine. I do."

"But?"

"Like hell am I letting you make me a goddamn pillow princess our first time together."

Nadine laughs, damn near crows, in response to Chloe's reasoning. She muffles it against Chloe's neck, interrupting it with light kisses from time to time.

"Bokkie," she says a moment later. "Don't worry about me. Touching you will be enough."

Chloe grumbles. "China, I am not-- listen, if you aren't into _being_ touched, then fine, but if I'm allowed to get my hands on you, I refuse to be a pillow princess or anything close."

Nadine releases Chloe’s hair in order to drag her hand through it. “I can take care of myself,” she responds. Chloe lets out a soft gasp as though she’s just thought of Nadine touching herself. “I _want_ to do this for you…” She tries to make her voice a near growl, something Chloe seems to respond well to. At least, she has before, though it was never this context.

With a groan, Chloe shakes her head. “No, China. Not until I can _take care_ of you too. And you-- you doing that absolutely incredible voice isn’t helping, you know.” She takes a long, deep breath. “Give me… Give me a few days, dearest. To where I can handle it, yeah? Because, jesus, I want it, trust me.”

Nadine chuckles and presses a kiss to Chloe’s cheek. “Alright. But the invitation is there.”

“Mm, you’re the best.”

Nadine runs her hand through her partner’s hair again. “Lean your head back. I’ll wash your hair.”

* * *

“Two months?”

Alethea nods. “That is when the storms will be passable from our side. Should you wish, you would be able to leave and return to the life you had.” She’s pacing a bit, as she says this. “You would need a boat and some supplies, but no more. You are proficient with sea craft, Nadine?”

“Ja, I can boat well enough.”

“We can provide you guidance via the stars,” Phoebe adds. “Will you need to be taught how to read them?”

“Yes, it’d be good. Been a long time since my pops taught me how.”

Chloe looks over at Nadine from her spot on the bed. “Your dad taught you that?”

Nadine smiles. “He insisted. Besides, it was good for our camping trips.”

“The next clear night, we will practice,” Phoebe speaks up.

Alethea pauses in by the doorway and looks out at the village for a moment. “Should you wish it, we can have a boat readied with the supplies when the time is right.”

Nadine and Chloe share a look.

“We wish it,” Chloe says with half a grin. “Lots of things to get back to, lots of irons in the fire, you know how it is.”

Alethea responds with a sad smile. “I understand, yes.” She sighs. “That does lead me to my next topic: resources. Resources on the island are limited, as I have already discussed with you, Nadine.” She starts to pace again. “Because of this, there is a… _payment_ , required in order for us to be willing to send you out with a boat.”

“That makes sense. So you get something out of it, you don’t just lose a boat, yeah?” Chloe seems to understand it pretty well.

Nadine gets it, but she’s not sure what they could have as payment. The most valuable thing they have-- the statue. She’d almost forgotten they have it. But she doubts it has monetary value here of all places. It’s not even a huge amount of useful metal. Besides, she doubts Chloe would willingly give it up. That’s their payday, once they get out of here.

Nadine opens her mouth to suggest it but Alethea is already talking.

“We know those on our shores do not have much. But we know you are both intelligent women. And knowledge, as I have said, is invaluable. In exchange for the boat we provide, we ask that the both of you leave with us your knowledge.”

Oh. That’s a bit different, isn’t it?

“The books in the library. The handwritten ones,” Nadine chimes in. “You’d like us to contribute in exchange for the boat?”

Phoebe grins. “Exactly. Two months will give you the time to fill just enough to have us be comfortable with letting it away from the island.”

“As well as supplies. But there is another way we’d ask you-- you, Nadine specifically, to contribute.” Alethea’s smile turns a bit warmer. “In fact, you agreed to it earlier. Lend your strength to those who need it. Just chores for those who can’t do it on their own.”

“Ja. It’s no issue.”

“Wonderful.”

“We thought,” Phoebe begins. “that during the day, you would help around the island as needed- when you are not assisting Chloe. And in the evening, when you, Chloe, are lucid, the two of you might spend time in the library and leave us what knowledge you can.”

“Sounds good to me. How about you, China?”

Nadine nods. “Ja.” She sits on the edge of the bed, careful not to jostle Chloe. “Is there anything you want to know from us? Or is it anything we might be proficient in?”

Alethea finally stops pacing and stands beside Phoebe’s seat. She smiles again. “Facts, science, things of that nature are useful. But so are new stories. Things that have happened to you, adventures you’ve had-- You mentioned finding lost cities. Shambala, yes? And two others? Belur and… I’m afraid I do not remember the last name.”

“Halebidu. And we have more stories than even those. I could probably fluff them out with plenty of historical facts,” Chloe answers. “That’s honestly where my expertise lies. I don’t mind writing it all down.”

“You could probably describe that better anyway.” Nadine shrugs. “I can certainly write plenty on military tactics and types of guns. Maybe some of my experiences with Shoreline.”

“You are a soldier?”

The question comes from Phoebe. She seems surprised to find that out and maybe a tad uncomfortable with it.

“Ex-soldier,” Chloe fills in.

Nadine gives her a grateful look. “Ja. Used to be, until Chloe. I don’t do that sort of thing anymore.” She crosses her arms. “Maybe treasure hunter isn’t the most moral job, but it’s better than Shoreline. Better than the military.”

Her saying that seems to please Chloe. It’s all truth, what she says, and she’d say more if she had to. Chloe and their jobs together feel right. Shoreline… Shoreline had not. She’d pretended, sure, but nothing felt as good as her partnership with Chloe and discovering ancient ruins and their hidden treasures.

“She’s just being modest, by the by,” Chloe speaks up again. “If you ever need to know about an animal, she’s who you’d go to. You heard her at the barn, 'Thea. Knows loads about just about any animal you can bring up. She looks tough, but she’s a big softy underneath.”

Nadine frowns and her cheeks turn a bit more pink. “Hmph.”

“She’s acting all put out because I called her soft, but I’m sure she’s still got a poem or two memorized that she can write down for your library.”

She gives Nadine a warm look. This all feels like she’s making fun of her, or at least it does until Chloe does that. This is Chloe being proud of her, in some way. It’s past the things she’s been raised to prioritize, like guns and planning and the ability to take or throw a punch. This is just… Chloe’s pride in her. Nadine had been annoyed, yes, but she’s still getting past her shoreline instincts. “Soft” had been an insult then. For Chloe, it’s the opposite. It’s simply Chloe appreciating who she is, “soft” hobbies and all.

Nadine sighs. “I can write down animal things too, ja. I-- It’s been a while since I actually read through any poems, so I’m not sure what I can give you there.”

Alethea clasps her hands together before her. “All of that sounds wonderful. Well-- if you could prioritize the science-- animals and such-- over military, we may prefer that.”

“We are not fans of war here,” Phoebe speaks up. “Recordings of them, why they happened and how. But war, unhealthy conflict, is no friend of ours. The few times guns have washed up here, we have taken them apart and used their materials for something else.”

“I understand. Especially since it’s unlikely to find yourselves under siege with how your island seems to work.”

Althea’s expression turns distant. “The gods have protected us from that.”

Both Phoebe and Alethea have turned rather dark at the mention, but it’s only a few seconds before Alethea shakes her head, as if to lose the thought, and smiles again. “I’m certain someone in the village would be willing to help you two fill your journals. Lindiwe has already grown a fondness for you, Nadine. I’m certain she might wield a pen for you in return for stories of your home country.”

Nadine finds herself smiling at that. “She seemed like a good kid. I don’t mind telling her what I can.”

“Excellent. We can start tomorrow, yes? The chores, the writing-- But for now, it is growing late and Phoebe and I both have duties to attend to.”

Phoebe stands and waits as her mother hands something to Nadine.

“Her medicine for tonight.”

After that, the two say their goodbyes and head for the door. It’s only a moment before Nadine and Chloe are alone together.

“Two months,” Chloe says, eyes locked with Nadine’s. “Feels like a long time.”

“At least you should be healed by then. It’ll make the trip back easier.”

Chloe hums in agreeance and leads heavy on Nadine’s side with her head on her shoulder. “The pain isn’t as bad as it was… Well, if I stay completely still.”

Nadine presses an absentminded kiss to the top of her head. “An impossible task for you. Want your pain killers?”

Chloe takes a deep breath. “Give me a few minutes, China. I’m no fan of them.”

“Just as long as the pain is manageable.”

“Manageable enough.” She slips her hand into Nadine’s.

Nadine brings her thumb over the back of Chloe’s hand in a gentle little circle. “We’ll get you to the library before they wear off tomorrow, ja? So the journey doesn’t make it worse.”

“Sounds like a plan, China. I hope you’re thinking of what adorable little animals you’re going to write about.”

She chuckles. “Of course.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for reading!


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PTSD stuff in this chapter a bit, as fair warning

There’s a solid thunk as Nadine swings her axe down on the log in front of her. It splits and she moves it to the pile she’s already finished. Grabbing another, she sets it up and lets the axe fall again. It splits halfway, so she sets the axe aside and picks it up again, one hand gripping one side, the other hand on the other. She pulls and it breaks the rest of the way. She tosses both halves onto the pile.

Nearby, Chloe is seated, watching all of this. She hasn't been awake long, having slept in as she has everyday since arriving here. She thinks her body is healing well, but her judgement only comes when lucidity does.

The drugs don't affect her so far as stopping her from admiring Nadine. And Nadine, jesus, is someone to be admired. She's in shorts and a sports bra. Her hair is tied back, which is a bit of a shame, but her muscles are an excellent distraction from that. She's stunning, of course, with the beautiful definition of her abs and her entire back. Chloe just wants to bite the V that dips under the hem of her shorts. There's a sheen of sweat on her from the work she's put in.

Chloe isn’t quite sure how she got so lucky. Her partner, her lover, is the tough on the outside, soft on the inside, Nadine Ross. The fact that they’d butted heads fairly quickly at the start of working together-- surely due to stubbornness on both sides-- had made it seem like it would be a one job thing. And here they are, some time later, sleeping in the same bed. They haven’t given any distinct names to what they are but it’s  _ something _ . She doesn’t care to put a name on it as long as she has Nadine at all. But do they need anything more than "partner" right now?

Nadine sets the axe aside and brushes the back of her hand over her forehead. “Think I’m done here. Want me to bring you back to the house? You can nap before we head to the library.”

“Dunno. If you’re doing something else like this, I would  _ absolutely _ love to watch.” With a sleepy blink, she looks Nadine up and down. “I could get used to seeing you like this.”

Nadine grins at her. “I knew there was a reason you wanted to come with me for this. Shameless, ja?”

Chloe chuckles. “How could I be shameful at all when it comes to staring at you? Anyone with a brain would find you attractive.”

That blush she likes to much rises to Nadine’s cheeks. Getting this reaction has always been something she enjoyed, even before they were whatever they are now. It’d started at that one comment after finding the queen’s bracelet. “ _ You’re adorable _ ” and the bright red flush Nadine had turned after. Chloe had gotten addicted to it then. She tries for it whenever she can now. 

“I think Alethea wanted me to help Tessa with something,” Nadine fills in, getting back to her original question. “Something about fishing, I think.”

“Hm. Doesn’t sound like something that’ll let me see you like this. I probably will take a nap, then, before the library.”

Nadine takes a long drink from the leather bota bag she’s been provided. Once done, she rolls her shoulders. “It’ll be a moment before we go. I’ve got to move this pile where it belongs, first.”

“Oh, please. Take your time. It just means I get to stare more.”

With a roll of her eyes, Nadine gets to it.

Chloe, of course, thoroughly enjoys it. She’s back to being able to watch Nadine’s back muscles tighten and flex as she hefts up armfuls of the cut wood. It’s tantalizing. Chloe wants nothing more than to touch those lovely back dimples near her hips.

Nadine carrying her is always fun, as well. She likely only has a few more days of that special treatment; her body will likely be healthy enough for crutches soon.

Once she’s back in bed, Nadine gives her a quick kiss and departs.

Sleep, surprisingly, doesn’t arrive for her. Her medication seems to be at the start of wearing off; she’d asked for a smaller dose today, rather than what she’d been given originally. She doesn’t care if she feels pain, as long as it’s manageable. She already hates that it’s so far out of her control, this whole ordeal. Having her mind be foggy is no fun. She can’t even remember what she had for breakfast, or even the walk from the house to where Nadine was chopping firewood.

Her aches and pains are noticeable now, but not so bad as to be debilitating. Most of her bruises show signs of healing well, save for a nasty bit on her ribs. Cracked, Nadine had guessed. Not surprising, seeing how the rest of her looks like she’s been beaten with a baseball bat.

The most painful part, truly, is her ankle. The gash on her shin, combined with her sprained ankle, are horrible when jostled. She has to keep from moving her foot at all and even prevent turning that knee in any direction. It’s absolutely no fun, especially when she very much wants to get on top of Nadine as soon as possible.

Unable to sleep, Chloe sits up. Nadine, surely, is in the midst of her next task. It’s unlikely anyone will check on her before Nadine gets back; she’s usually asleep at this time of day.

Being unable to walk on her own is horrible. She hates it.

But rather than be completely bored and spend more hours, restless, in bed, Chloe braces herself and swings her legs over the edge of the bed. She gasps in pain, but lets her uninjured-- well, less injured-- foot touch the ground.

She only wants to make her way to the table. That’s where, currently, some of the books Nadine had brought back from the library are. It’s not exactly what Chloe wants, but it is certainly better than nothing.

What Chloe does want is to explore. She wants to get up and move around. See the island. There’s got to be so much to learn here.

But for now, she makes her way to the table. Most of the way, she can use the objects around her for balance, but she’s forced to hop a meter or so when she reaches an open space. She tries not to think about Nadine yelling at her for doing this. What else is she supposed to do? Stay in bed with nothing to do? She thinks not. And a little danger never hurt anyone. Mostly.

She braces herself, but starts as someone speaks behind her.

“You best not be thinkin’ of getting there without help.”

Chloe freezes and looks back over her shoulder. It’s Taliza, the village’s doctor, standing in the doorway.

Chloe gives her a sheepish smile. “Have to get over there somehow.”

Taliza smiles. “I’ll help.” She sidles up beside Chloe and hooks under her arm. She’s rather short, but she makes due getting Chloe over to the table.

“Thanks.”

“It’s no problem. Came to check on ya’. And change your bandages. We gotta keep it clean so it heals right.”

Chloe nods. “Sounds good to me. And I’m sure Nadine will be grateful for it. She’s always going on and on about how I should take care of myself better.”

Taliza lets out a soft laugh. “It sounds like she’s good for you. Gotta take care of yourself if you wanna keep goin’.”

A bit of a huff leaves Chloe. “But I’m so bored just sitting here. And I’m in pain but I don’t like that keeping me from getting out of bed… I couldn’t even sleep when I tried not long ago.” She starts to bounce her good leg. “I’m just finding myself a bit restive. And books are better than nothing, you know?”

With a nod, Taliza pulls out the other chair at the table. “Prop your leg up here, will ya’?” Chloe does, grimacing a bit. “And if your pain is lessenin’, we might be able to find something to do for a bit. Alethea has got you fillin’ out books for her, yeah?”

“We’re supposed to start this evening, when Nadine gets back.”

“I’m sure you could take your book back here with ya’, write while Nadine is out ‘n’ about.”

“That’s still a lot of sitting still.”

With careful hands,Taliza starts on unwrapping the bandage from Chloe’s leg.

“That I can’t help ya’ with. But I don’t got much to do today. I can keep ya’ company if ya’ like.”

“If you don’t mind. I’d like to think I’m good company. And maybe you can tell me a bit more about the island, since I can’t actually explore right now.”

“Sure. As long as you tell me a story or two about off the island.”

“It’s a deal.”

With a grin, Taliza removes a small bag from her hip. “I heard you and your woman like to travel.”

Chloe can’t help but smile. Her woman. She likes that. “We rarely stay in one place for long. Our first… adventure together was in India. But we’ve been to Brazil, all along the amazon river, Egypt, Russia… Of course, Australia and South Africa too. Way more besides, if you count the ones we’ve each been to, rather than been there together.”

“Perhaps “liking t’ travel” is a simple description for where you’ve been.” She wets a bit of cloth and brings it over Chloe’s leg. It stings some, but it’s far from feeling genuinely pained for the moment. “When I was young, I hated all those plane trips. I wasn’t meant to be up in the sky, no matter how fancy our flight was.”

“You’re from off the island?” Chloe feels a bit surprised at that. Taliza, though not greek, seems to fit perfectly into the lifestyle here.

“Washed up a long time ago. I was taken in by the people here, got treated right, got called the right name. All of it. Wasn’t even a decision, deciding to stay. I was just a kid, I couldn’t just float outta here. But I like it here. It’s always felt right.” Taliza brings a fresh bandage around Chloe’s injured leg. “It’s quiet ‘ere. And I have plenty a’ friends around.”

“You certainly seem to fit. Though I suppose if it’s been a couple decades, you’ve had time to find your place.”

“Ain’t hard t’ find one, not here. There’s always a spot that needs fillin’.” Taliza finishes up and attaches the end of the bandage. “Your woman, Nadine, that’s what she’s findin’ now. We always need someone able-bodied that can fill those roles. Our village is small and ‘til the young uns are old enough, Phoebe does a lot on her own.”

“Nadine is good at a lot, so I’m not surprised she’s useful. I certainly find her that way.”

This earns a chuckle from the doctor. "I’m sure ya do.” She stands back and looks over her handywork. She seems satisfied with it. “Now, if you’re gonna be hoppin’ around here on that injured leg, I’m gonna hafta’ bring crutches down for ya.”

Chloe’s bruises ache just thinking about crutches. “I might lose my excuse to have Nadine carry me everywhere then. But it’s probably still a good idea. That way I can get about when she’s not around.”

Taliza stares at her for a moment. “Now, Nadine mentioned she thinks you might have a couple a’ cracked ribs. So you gotta take it easy, yeah? I’ll bring the crutches down, but the most we can do for those ribs is get ya’ painkillers. So don’t make it worse.”

Chloe snorts. “Thanks, sweetpea, but I should be fine. I’m certain Nadine is going to stop me from doing what I want to if the pain doesn’t first. I’m sure my ribs will be mostly healed by the time I actually get to exploring.”

The other woman leans against the table. “That your thing? Explorin’?”

“You could say that. I’ve been exploring since I was seventeen-- well, professionally. I did a lot of kid-level exploring when I was younger.”

“That mean you got a good story to tell me about it?”

“Oh, I’m sure I can think of something.”

* * *

“Nadine. Good to see you. Thanks for helping me out with this.”

Nadine nods. “It’s no problem. I prefer to keep moving and Alethea has given me opportunities for that.”

Tessa grins. “She’s good at finding the places people need to be. And you should be able to get a decent workout doing this. Well, depending on how much we get.”

The two of them are just outside of the house Tessa and Taliza share, amidst the small garden of Taliza’s. Nadine isn’t sure exactly what they’re about to head out and do, but she’d been sent to Tessa, so this is where she’d headed. Nadine had run into Taliza who was on her way out and chatted for a moment, both about her task with Tessa and Chloe’s progress in healing.

Tessa is a pleasant woman. She’s got some height on Nadine but a bit less muscle mass. Her hair is short and fairly curly with the sides of her head shaved down to nearly nothing. Her accent is from the states, if Nadine had to guess, but she can’t tell which state. They haven’t had a real chance to chat, but Nadine doesn’t see herself having any issues. There’s already some common ground between them, even if it’s basis is simply “attracted to women”. Nadine has started friendships from less.

“What is it I’m helping you with? Alethea only mentioned something about fishing.”

“It’s exactly that.” She motions to Nadine to follow. “Come on. I’ll show you. You’re taking the spot of Evan, the kid who usually helps me. He sprained his wrist shortly before you arrived here, so he’s on some easier jobs until he’s healed up.”

Tessa leads her down the main path through the village for a bit until taking a well traveled side road towards the sea. Nadine hasn’t been on this part of the island yet. Ahead of them lies some docks poking into the water. They’re simply little structures, most likely frankensteined together out of whatever was available. There are a couple boats here as well.

Tessa heads for the last dock on the right. “Almost there.”

Nadine follows. She still isn’t entirely sure how she’s helping fish. She guesses she’ll have to be taught quite a bit about this.

With no hesitation, Tessa steps onto the small boat.

But Nadine hesitates.

Tessa looks back at her, confused. “You alright?”

She gulps. She’s never been hydrophobic. As much time as she could, when she was young, had been spent in the water. But now, standing here on the dock with the prospect of climbing into a boat, Nadine feels afraid.

She remembers, quite suddenly, the feel of Chloe being ripped from her in the water. Sees the waves rising over her and crashing down. The boat taking on water. The frantic action of deploying the liferaft all while knowing Chloe is gone, gone,  _ gone _ . How is she supposed to do this? What if it happens again?

Guilt chokes her. She feels like she’s going to throw up. Getting on this boat-- she’s going to do something wrong again. Chloe might get hurt. That’s what happens when Nadine messes up.

A hand sets on her shoulder. “Nadine. Are you okay?”

Nadine looks up at Tessa with a frown. “I-- the boat. I’m not…”

Tessa frowns. “Right. That was recent. What happened must’ve been horrible.”

Nadine feels shaky. She sits on the edge of the dock rather than collapse. Tessa hops back off the boat and takes a seat beside her.

“If you can’t do it, I understand. We can find you a different job, it doesn’t have to be this.”

Nadine doesn’t know how to respond. Those scenes are still flashing in her head. And Chloe-- Chloe is alive, but she’s spent the last few days in horrible pain when she’s not drugged to the point of numbness. The boat, the memory of it still fresh, it feels like it’s overwhelming her.

“Hey… Would talking help? Or-- I mean, I've been in a shipwreck before. I can tell you about my experience if you want.”

Taking a deep breath, Nadine nods. “It-- It might. Talking that is. Eish, I-- I’m usually not like this.”

“That sort of trauma can affect anyone. Even if you were the most badass person on the planet, the trauma of nearly dying at sea would hit you.” Tessa sighs. “As far as I know, I’m the only one who survived the wreck I was in. And-- I was armed forces once. A soldier. I’ve seen shit I don’t even want to think about. But I think of that fear of the same thing happening and not being able to stop the ship from going down or anything like that and… That’s worse. A lot more hopeless.”

“You still get on the boat?” The question is barely a murmur from Nadine.

“I do. But it took me time. And it’s different for everyone, you know? It’s been nearly twenty years since my wife, Tal, shipwrecked here. It was long before I did. She wasn’t even nine years old. She wasn’t even supposed to be on the ship she was on in the first place.” Tessa looks impossibly sad when she talks about this. The circumstances sound awful. “She’s no issue swimming, but she won’t step foot on a boat. She hasn’t since she got here.”

Nadine doesn’t know how to respond to that. She doesn’t like to think she might be like that. That fear might change her so much that she isn’t willing to face it.

“And me, I-- I lost a brother, when my ship went down…” Tessa goes quiet for a moment. “A lot of my fear back then, before I got back on a boat, came from that. It still does sometimes. I don’t-- I still blame myself, even if I don’t know why. I’d like to think he’s back home with mom. I-- There’s a guilt to it, I guess. But I’ve spent time working past it.”

Guilt. That’s something Nadine understands in regards to this. “Chloe shouldn’t have gotten hurt,” she finally says. “I feel responsible.”

The look on Tessa’s face softens. “... Is it because you were steering the boat?”

“I-- yes. And I fell asleep, we-- I laid down in the sun with her. When I woke up, it was just about to storm. And I couldn’t get us out of it.” She swears. “Now Chloe’s hurt. All because I was careless.”

“Does she blame you?”

“She should.”

“That wasn’t the question. Does she blame you?”

Nadine frowns. “No. She… She wants me to blame her rather than myself. But I can’t.”

“Then you’re not at fault. If she doesn’t blame you, then there’s no reason to blame yourself.”

She shakes her head. “She always does this. I do something wrong that gets her hurt and she forgives me right away even though she should be angry with me for it. I love her, and I won’t leave her as long as she wants me around, but I keep-- I keep messing up!” She mutters a few soft Afrikaans swears. “The fact she’s this hurt and hasn’t left me is unbelievable.”

Tessa huffs. “She cares about you. And she doesn’t blame you for it. Sounds like she doesn’t blame you for any of it.”

“Eish, I punched her. Before we were partners. And she acted like it was nothing, when we made up. I hate it. That trip, she cracked two ribs, was grazed by a bullet, and was covered in bruises. And had a split lip, because of me.” Her hands hands are balled into fists at her side. “This damn boat wreck has made everything worse. I can’t even step on a freaking boat because I-- I keep feeling her pulled away from me. She was just… ripped away. Just gone.”

Nadine is shaking.

Tessa grips her forearm. “Stay with me, Nadine. Chloe is alive. She made it here.”

She has to focus on that. Chloe is alive.

“If you aren’t ready to get on the boat, I'm sure Alethea can find something else for you to do. We can get you back to Chloe first."

Nadine squeezes her eyes shut. Fishing is a big part of feeding the village. Going out alone on a boat is far worse than two people making the trip.

"Fok…" She takes a deep breath. "I want to try."

Tessa seems uncertain, but she nods. "Okay. We'll use cast nets today and stick closer to the shore."

“I appreciate it.”

Tessa stands and steps back onto the boat. “When you’re ready.”

She has to do this, Nadine reminds herself. These chores, these duties, are all to earn herself and Chloe a way home. Chloe has no way to help at this time. So Nadine has to do this. It’s not even her and Chloe alone depending on this; this village needs every bit of food it can get. Fishing is their primary source of food. Helping Tessa do this helps the whole village, not just herself.

Nadine sort of hates herself for being this weak and having to convince herself. The boat is small, they aren’t heading to open ocean, and getting on is a necessity.

And Chloe is alive. She’s not going to be on this boat. There’s no reason Nadine should hold herself back from it.

Nadine steps onto the boat.

It feels like it’s swaying under her more than it should. Tessa clasps her arm and gives her a smile. “I got you. We’ll be just fine.”

With a small, barely forced smile, Nadine sighs. “I appreciate that.”

“You ready to go, or do you need a minute before I untie us?”

“Just do it. I’ll be fine.”

“Take a seat. We’ll go around the edge until we hit a fishing spot.”

Nadine feels a bit more steady once she’s sitting. Tessa guides the boat away from the dock and into deeper water. Nadine isn’t afraid of capsizing here; she can swim well, so she doesn’t worry about that. It’s still that constant thought of what had happened maybe a week ago. She can see it still, a wave crashing over them and Chloe suddenly being gone.

Tess bumps her shoulder, bringing her back. “Hey. If it gets too much, let me know and I’ll get you back to shore.”

“Danke.”

It’s only a moment or two later that Tessa brings them to a halt and tosses the anchor.

“You ever used a cast net before?”

“I haven’t.”

“I’ll teach you.”

Nadine finds being in the boat easier when she’s distracted. The distraction just starts as Tessa showing her how to toss out the cast net. It’s followed by the work of hauling it back in, giving her a pleasant strain in her arms and back at the pull of the fish and the resistance of the water.

By their third haul, Nadine isn’t thinking about it anymore.

* * *

Chloe seems absolutely thrilled to see the library. She scrambles down out of Nadine’s arms, choosing instead to lean on her while standing on one foot.

“Jesus, there are a ton of books here. How long have you been collecting, did you say?”

Phoebe smiles. “Centuries. Every new inhabitant of Parádeisos has added something here. And now it’s your turn.”

Chloe swears under her breath. Nadine lets her lead the way to where she wants to look. No doubt she’d be climbing the shelves if she wasn’t injured.

Once Chloe has been brought around once, Phoebe leads them to a smaller area with a large wood and stone table. Already seated there is Lindiwe and Urvi, the young children Nadine had previously met.

Lindiwe perks up when she sees Nadine. “Nadine! We’re going to help you two write for the library!”

Nadine gives them a smile as she helps Chloe sit. “We could use it. Lindiwe, Urvi, this is Chloe. Chloe, this is Lindiwe and Urvi. I met them a couple days ago.”

Chloe chuckles. "Cute kids. Urvi, huh? That's an Indian name. You've got family from there Im guessing?"

Urvi nods. “My dad.”

“My dad was from India too.”

Nadine leaves them to talk, heading over to where Phoebe is crouched at the cabinet containing empty journals. Right away, Phoebe hands over four. “One for you and Chloe, and one for each of the children.”

“You all take this very seriously here.”

“It is our way. We cannot send anyone out to explore the world as they would have no way to bring their knowledge safely back to us.” Phoebe removes a few pristine feathers from a small pouch as well as two small clay jars. The feathers, Nadine assumes are quill pens. The jars are likely filled with some sort of ink.

The two head back over to the table together. Nadine passes each of the others a journal before she takes her seat.

Phoebe stands at the end of the table with her hands on her hips. “Fill out what you can. I will be nearby if you have need of me.”

With that, she disappears into the depths of the library.

Nadine takes a deep breath and looks down at her unopened journal. What’s she supposed to write about?

Chloe nudges her a bit. “Urvi is gonna help me fill some things out. You’ve got Lindiwe on your team, alright?”

Nadine looks over to Lindiwe with a smile. “Sounds good.” She takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly. “Eish. Best get started then, huh?”

“What are you going to write?” Lindiwe asks.

That, Nadine doesn’t know. Not really. But Alethea had asked them to prioritize the scientific over the military. So maybe she’ll start with animals.

“Animals, I think,” Nadine responds quietly.

“Am I helping with that? Or do you have something else you want me to put in my book?”

Nadine gives her a smile. “Is there something you’d like to know about that I may know?”

Lindiwe bounces up and down in her chair. “Phoebe said you spoke Afrikaans. Can you teach me?”

She chuckles. “Sure. What I can, at least.”

Chloe harrumphs. “Oh I see. Can’t teach me, but you’ll teach her just fine.”

“Eish. We’ve never had time. Always traveling and what not.”

Grumbling, she opens her journal. “Plenty of time on our long plane trips. Or the nights we spend in hotels after a job.”

Nadine bumps her a bit with her arm. “Maybe Lindiwe will teach you after I teach her.”

She gets only a hum in response before Chloe turns her attention to Urvi.

Nadine puts her full attention on Lindiwe. “Alright. What languages do you know?”

A lot, is the answer to that. Lindiwe had been born on the island, which meant she’s been raised under ever language they’ve collected. After centuries, there’s many on this island, some that have been dead for a long time. But for what Lindiwe does know, Afrikaans should be easy to learn. She’s got dutch in her repertoire. It’s one of the main “ancestors” of the Afrikaans language. Nadine can already tell she’s eager to learn.

On the other side of the table, Chloe seems to be recounting the story of her hunt for the Cintamani stone to Urvi. Her own quill is flowing over the paper already. From a glance, Nadine can see it’s their time going after the Tusk of Ghanesh.

Nadine takes a deep breath, dips her quill in ink, and puts it to the page. It’s strange to use a quill, but she gets used to it fairly quickly. She talks to Lindiwe as she writes.

In her journal, she starts with elephants. They’re not her favourite animal, but they make her think of Chloe, which is at least part of the reason she’s learned even more on them since India. She surprises herself with how much she can write on them.

Writing with the quill may be strange, but drawing is even more so. She adds a few small drawings to depict differences between Indian elephants, African bush elephants, and African forest elephants. After, she includes what she knows of some elephant and human interaction, including an injured elephant seeking help from humans.

She ponders for a moment if she should include her and Chloe’s interaction. She can still barely believe she’d been able to, accidentally, ride a wild elephant. It’s more than likely Chloe will write about it in her own journal. After all, that had been a large part in making up with each other.

Nadine realizes there’s going to be a written account of that punch she’d knocked Chloe down with. Eish. That stings a bit. But it’s better to have the truth.

Nadine decides to add her account. Two sides of a story is better than one, even if both sides are positive.

After, she moves to grey langurs, another animal that puts her in mind of Chloe now. Their journey in India had tied up many different things with the simple thought of Chloe. Nadine supposes that happens when you care about someone.

Grey langurs are a species she’s read about a  _ lot _ . They’re her favourite monkey, afterall, with the ring of hair around their faces and their variety of types. She knows a bit on each different species of grey langur, so it fills a few pages.

She gets through two more species (the rose ringed parakeet and the hog-nosed bat) and through quite a bit of vocabulary with Lindiwe before Phoebe makes her way back over.

“It is growing late,” Phoebe announces. “Tomorrow, you can return and continue your work here. For now, it is nearing time for bed.”

Nadine rolls her shoulders. She’s fairly sleepy, she realizes. Bed sounds nice after her long day of work.

“Would you mind if I took mine with me? And a quill and ink.” It’s Chloe speaking up. “I don’t have much to do during the day before I come here.”

Phoebe smiles. She seems to like the question. “Of course.”

“Where should we put these?” Nadine gestures to her still open journal.

“Leave them. They will be fine here until tomorrow.” She looks to Urvi and Lindiwe. “You two are learning?”

Both nod. Lindiwe holds up the journal she’s been writing in. “Nadine is teaching me Afrikaans!”

That makes Phoebe’s smile turn into a full grin. “You will have to help the others learn it.”

Nadine sets her quill aside and stands. Chloe closes her journal and places her own quill over it. Urvi and Lindiwe have already hopped up.

“I can carry your book for you,” Urvi pipes up. “And your ink.”

A smile appears on Chloe’s face. “That’d be very helpful, thank you.”

Chloe looks up at Nadine. “Any chance I can ask you for a ride?”

Nadine bites her tongue at the phrasing and nods. “And here I thought you’d sleep in the library.”

“Ah, you’d miss me too much.”

“... I would.”

Nadine scoops her up bridal style and Chloe’s positive expression falls to a grimace. Nadine falters. “Did I hurt you?”

She scoffs. “Not you, dearest. Bruises still twinge a bit. Alright, a lot, but we’ll just get me some of those damn painkillers when we get back, yeah?”

“Ja. Of course.”

Chloe looks over the small group they have; Urvi and Lindiwe look rather sleepy, though Phoebe looks unaffected by the time. “Looks like we’re all ready to go.”

“Lindiwe, you can guide them back to the village, yes?” It’s Phoebe 

“Yes!”

“Excellent.” She looks to Chloe and Nadine. “My bed is here, but Lindiwe knows the way back. I will see you both tomorrow.”

Nadine is curious, but she knew Phoebe didn’t live in the village with the others.

It’s as they’re leaving that Phoebe calls to Nadine. “Nadine. Make sure to stop in with my mother in the morning. I believe she has found something you will enjoy helping with.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies if there are more typos in this chapter than usual. I'm not at my typical computer so it's a bit harder to check over it.
> 
> Thanks for reading!


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is much more of a filler with seeds planted for relevant future occurrences. And it lets me have both of them interact with a cute kid.

This is most certainly a task Nadine enjoys. She scratches behind the cow’s ear before bringing her hand back over the creature’s back.

The cows are taken care of. They had been her first duty. Now, she has to lead the small herd of sheep and goats out for the afternoon. It’s been a terribly long time since she’s had to do anything like this, but she’s been assured the animals know the way on their own. She’s just there to ensure none eat anything they shouldn’t.

Chloe isn’t out with her today. This is a bit more labour intensive than Chloe is capable of right now. Taliza has promised crutches now that Chloe is feeling a bit more up to it, but she’s not at the point of moving around anything more than their little house.

Nadine had woken that morning before Chloe, as always, and made a quick breakfast for them both with the food supplied to them by Alethea. Chloe hadn’t been awake for long when Alethea had arrived to give Nadine her daily tasks.

Tending to the animals is certainly something she is willing to do. She says as much when Alethea requests it of her.

It’s not long after that she meets Elizabeth, a slender little woman who’s heavily pregnant. She teaches Nadine what she needs to do for the animals before returning to her home. She needs the help as she’s heavily pregnant and it’s harder and harder for her to do what’s needed for the livestock.

The animals all seem well trained. At the very least, they listen to her as she clicks her tongue and directs them as Elizabeth had taught her.

“Nadine!”

Nadine glances over at the fence where Lindiwe is leaning.

“Goeie more, laatlammetjie.”

The girl perks up, tilting her head to the side. “Good morning… what’s the last part mean?”

With a smile, Nadine tries to find a way to word it. “It means “late lamb”... It’s something you might call a much younger sibling, ja? Or the like.”

Lindiwe smiles wide. “Mage said I could come help with your chores, since mine are done.”

“That’s very kind of your mother.”

“I was hoping you can teach me more Afrikaans.”

“Ja, if you’d like. You’re already learning fast.”

The girl shoots her another smile as she climbs over the fence. A goat startles as she lands and heads back into the herd. “I want to learn as many as I can! That way, when I’m old enough, I can go explore the world.”

“You want to leave the island?” This is the first time anyone from the island has expressed anything like that. Most seem content where they are.

“Yes! I like it here, but I want to see what’s out there. I want to go to where my family is from. I want to see things like… the eiffel tower! And, and… big cities. Tessa said where she came from, all the people in her city couldn’t fit on this island.” Lindiwe bounces on her heels. "Elizabeth told me about a place called Disneyland! It's apparently magical and fun! I want to go very badly."

Nadine laughs. "I've never been, but I've heard it's enjoyable."

Her eyes go wide. "It really exists?"

"Ja. Disneyland and Disney World. There are a few." She shrugs. "I've only been to smaller theme parks. Chloe brought me to one a few months ago so she could ride some of the roller coasters."

"Elizabeth told me about roller coasters! Like our wooden carts but very fast and for no purpose but to have fun."

“There’s plenty of things like that out there. Chloe is a fan of much of them." Nadine shrugs. "Anything that gets her adrenaline going."

Lindiwe dips down and picks up a goat kid. It bleats at her but doesn't struggle to be put down. "What else can you do like that?"

Nadine doesn't have to think long to find an answer. "Her favourite is rock climbing. Without equipment, unfortunately, but she's good at it."

"Elizabeth said there are lots of mountains out there. Very big ones. Is that where you'd climb?"

"Sometimes, ja." Nadine urges a stray sheep back towards the center and keeps them moving. "But sometimes buildings or old ruins. Depends on where we travel."

"Do you travel a lot?"

"Oh, yes. We rarely head back to our places. There's a lot of things to discover in the world."

Lindiwe lights up. This seems to be something she's ecstatic to hear about. “I wish I could see what you two have! Urvi told me about the story Chloe’s telling. It seems too magical to be true!”

Nadine snorts. “Trust me. It’s true. She’s got the scars to prove it.”

“Were you there? In Tibet?” The young goat squirms out of Lindiwe’s arms then to join its family on the ground.

Nadine clicks her tongue and ushers it farther into the group. “I wasn’t. That was long before we met. She had others with her. Our friend Elena, and an ex boyfriend of hers too.”

“Have you been on adventures like it?”

“Mhm. Mostly with Chloe, but one or two of my own.”

“What was your favourite?”

Nadine’s thoughts go back to India first, with their search for the tusk, but then she changes her mind.

“Mongolia,” she responds. “A woman at the Center of Cultural Heritage of Mongolia hired us to track down a small group of people who had raided a burial mound. They’d stolen some artifacts and damaged the human remains inside.”

“What was good about it?”

Lindiwe likes to ask questions, it seems, but Nadine finds she doesn’t really mind.

“A lot of it was travel, admittedly. Mongolia is incredibly large and rather featureless in the way of towns and the like. They don’t have many roads there, either, so we rode horses for most of it.” Nadine smiles at the memory. “Chloe was irritated for most of it. She isn’t one for slow-going. But we saw a lot… I took care of the horses and set up the tents while she did most of the navigation. And at night we’d curl up together, maybe read something… Eish, and when we finally caught up to the looters, Chloe challenged them to a card game. Won their horses, any cash they had on them, and charmed them so thoroughly, they got drunk to the point of passing out.”

Lindiwe claps her hands together. “What did you do then?”

“Tied their hands, took back the artifacts we’d been sent for and one of their horses to carry it. Then we untied their other horses so they wouldn’t be able to chase us down right away. We started the trip back right after.” She shrugs. It’s probably iffy telling a child about this, but it had been one of their least violent jobs anyway. It’s not like she was describing dropping Asav into a canyon with a bomb on top of him. “We road for a night and a day without stopping. When we finally finished that one, she made us go to a spa because she wanted to forget camping existed.”

“I wish I could travel like you two do.” The girl purses her lips. “Which means I need to learn more languages.” She gets a determined look on her face. “Please teach me more Afrikaans.”

Nadine laughs. “Of course.”

* * *

Chloe is getting incredibly sick of the painkillers. She’s no lotus eater-- not that anyone on the island seems to be, from her previous understanding of the titles. She’s just so tired of forgetting a chunk of her day-- for the life of her, she can’t remember what chore Nadine was given that morning. She’s certain Nadine is safe, but the fact she’s forgotten at all pisses her off.

The pain is still bad enough most mornings that the painkiller seems worth it, but as soon as it starts to wear off-- even earlier now, as if she’s building up a tolerance-- she realizes how little of the day it gets her.

It makes it worse that she has no idea what she’s said, to anyone, in the last few hours. She’s rather shameless, sure, but it doesn’t mean she wants to forget.

Chloe decides she doesn’t want to think about it for the moment. What she wants to do is go sit on the beach, but she’s not sure she’ll be able to get there on her own. She’s got crutches, but crutches on sand seem like a bad time. She’ll have to make due here.

She can, at least, make it just outside the door and to the two small steps in front of it. Or maybe she should just drag one of the chairs by the window and make due like that. She just needs some fresh air. She feels too cooped up.

Chloe decides to sit on the steps. It takes an extra trip, but she gets the journal there, as well as her quill pen and ink.

The fact she’s using a quill pen and ink is sort of funny to her in a way. She’s read hundreds of old documents that were probably written in the same way, but here she is in the twenty first century, writing an entire book’s worth with them.

She genuinely enjoys writing. It surprises her a bit. Right now, all she’s jotting down is non-fiction, but she finds the idea of putting her own ideas on a page rather intriguing. Maybe she’ll try her hand at it when they’re off the island. For now, she should invest in helping earn them a boat.

Chloe remembers something quite suddenly at the thought of it. In her youth, she’d written a bit. Her father had encouraged the little stories she’d scribble out for him. She can’t remember when she started, but she remembers it had gone on until she’d been sent to Australia.

Thinking about back then isn’t something she’s particularly fond of. She knows she’s purposely forgotten or maybe suppressed a lot of what had gone on back then. Most of it in that time had been crappy if not outright horrible. But it’s some sort of bittersweet to remember the good from around then.

Maybe she really  _ should  _ revisit writing when she’s out of here. If writing the stories of her experiences feels pleasant, maybe she can find the same in fiction. Then again, it wouldn’t take much to make her experiences sound like fiction. Maybe there’s something to that.

At the very least, it would give her something to do on plane rides besides playing on her phone.

The weather outside is comfortable to be in. There’s a bit of shade falling over the steps, which she supposes works out for her. She wouldn’t want an uneven tan after all. She’s a tad bit envious of the one Nadine has started to get from her work on the island. She’d come back from fishing with Tessa a fair few shades darker with a smattering of new freckles to boot. Chloe’s rather partial to it all, of course, but she wishes she could just relax in the sun for a bit and tan a little too.

Maybe she can convince Nadine to bring her down to the beach before she heads out for chores tomorrow. Probably not, as she’d have no way to get back.

Jesus, she wishes she could go for a walk. And not one where she’s carried, as much as she enjoys being in Nadine’s arms. She wants to be on her own two feet and explore around the village some. The original tour they’d been brought on is fuzzy and full of holes.

Where Chloe would really like to go is back to the library. She knows she has time before she can, but the walls there must be covered in new things to learn. She’ll have to figure out how to get there earlier in the day at some point. Surely Nadine would be willing to bring her there and leave her for the day. It’s safer than being trapped on the beach, surely.

Chloe pauses in writing. She’s just reaching the last temple, where one of the cranks had snapped and sent her tumbling to the ground. It’s about where she had realized exactly how much she enjoyed being around Nadine. She decides to include that little piece of info in it. Afterall, who they were as people and how they came to be who they are now was defined by that trip. May as well keep things accurate.

There are voices in the distance. They aren’t headed towards her; perhaps they’re her neighbors in the closer houses nearby. She wouldn’t know. Everyone she’s met-- that she can remember-- has seemed nice enough. Taliza’s company had been a good change. The little woman has a quick wit and they’d had at least a couple things in common.

There’s a pleasant breeze blowing through. The weather here has been stellar.

It reminds her of a place she’d been on vacation some years ago, well before she had the privilege of partnering with Nadine. It’d been quiet and peaceful. The younger Chloe she had been had left after a only half the time intended. She’d needed action.

Now, after some amount of maturing, Chloe finds she doesn’t mind terribly much that she’ll be here for a couple months. She still itches to get up and  _ do something _ , but it’s not too strong. If she’s got to be here, then she’s got to be here. Besides, Nadine is here too. Things will be fine.

As if thinking of her has summoned her, Chloe hears Nadine in the distance. She spots her heading down the path towards the house with Lindiwe, the child who’d helped her write the previous night. The two are chatting together.

Nadine’s eyes fall on Chloe and she grins.

“Hey, gorgeous.”

“Chloe.” It’s only her name but it makes Chloe feel warm to hear it in that tone.

She motions for Nadine to help her up. Nadine is quick to do it and lets Chloe lean most of her weight on her.

“Ugh, you smell like a barn.”

Nadine snorts. “That  _ is  _ where I’ve been working most the day.”

“Ah. That explains it. I’d forgotten.”

Lindiwe offers Chloe’s crutches to her.

Chloe smiles. “Thanks, sweetheart.” She turns her attention back to Nadine. “You need a bath.”

“Ja, you’re right. I’m going to run to the bathhouse before we go to the library. You need anything before I do?”

She shifts back to her crutches and manages a shrug. “Well… If you’re willing to help get me down to the beach? I wanted to earlier but these things don’t really mix with sand.”

Nadine ponders it, eyes flicking down to Lindiwe, who’s just flipped over a rock to poke at the bugs hiding underneath. “You’re not scared of the water?”

“What? No.”

“But you nearly died.”

“I mean, I’ve fallen off plenty of cliffs, but I still climb them. If I hid from everything that nearly killed me, I’d be in a panic room twenty feet underground.”

Nadine doesn’t look pleased by that. Probably because a  _ lot  _ of things have nearly killed Chloe. And maybe she’s not happy of the thought of Chloe being alone on the beach, as if the water will see her and try it’s luck again if no one else is there to stop it.

“Hey, Lindiwe,” Chloe speaks up. “Would you be willing to head down to the beach with me? That way Nadine can go get washed up and not have to worry about me being alone down there.”

The kid is more than happy to, by the smile she gives them. “Sure!”

“See? Now I have company. Better now, darl?”

Nadine seems relieved. “Ja. A bit.”

“Lovely.” She takes a couple small steps, aided by the crutches, towards the beach. Her body protests each one, but she’s never been one to give in right away. And like hell is she taking any more painkillers right now.

Nadine practically hovers around Chloe as they head off. Lindiwe is a bit ahead of them.

Chloe has to grit her teeth to bear it, but she tries not to show how much pain she’s in. Nadine would worry too much.

Then again, Nadine seems to already be worrying too much. Chloe’s surprised she didn’t insist on carrying her down.

They make it to the edge of the sand, Lindiwe already halfway to the water, when Chloe motions Nadine a bit closer.

“Be my crutches in the sand?”

“Of course.”

Nadine slips in under Chloe’s arm with her own arm firm around Chloe’s back. She’s avoiding the worst of the bruises, Chloe knows, but it doesn’t stop the pressure adding a bit to the pain. It’s nothing Chloe can’t handle, though.

Chloe drops her crutches to the side.

“I could carry you, if that’s easier.”

There it is.

“No thanks, China. Coddle me too much and I may forget how to walk entirely. Not that I don’t love you showing off your strength.” Chloe craves the independence of a simple walk. This will have to do for now. It’d feel much worse to be carried. Any other time, she’d jump at the chance to be carried.

“Alright. But if you end up wanting me to--”

“I promise I’ll ask.”

The sand is warm, a nice contrast the cool breeze still blowing by. Chloe has Nadine bring her to a spot far enough from the water where Nadine won’t worry as much, but close enough that Chloe is satisfied. She can’t go swimming with an injured ankle anyway.

Lindiwe is splashing around at the edge of the water with her hands already digging into the sand.

Nadine helps lower Chloe to the sand and stays crouched beside her. “You’ll be fine here?”

“Yes, yes. Now go bathe.” She presses a chaste kiss to Nadine’s cheek. “That’s the last kiss you’ll get until you’re clean, got it? I don’t mind it when you’re just sweaty, but when you smell like a sheep, I’ve got complaints.”

With a chuckle, Nadine stands. “Eina, you wound me.”

“Motivation to be quick, dearest.” Chloe winks at her. “Hurry now. I’ll be right here when you’re done.”

“Back soon,” comes the promise before Nadine heads off.

Chloe watches her go before turning her attention back on what's in front of her. Lindiwe seems to have a small pile of shells put together. She scoops them up as Chloe watches and heads towards her. The child sits down besides Chloe and drops the shells between them.

“I found some really cool ones today,” Lindiwe says proudly. “One of the men in the village will make jewelry out of them if you ask him. I bring him good ones and he makes me things sometimes. He’s going to teach me how he does it when he has time.”

“That sounds fun. I used to collect shells myself when I was younger. One or two from each place by the sea that I’d been. I’ve got some nice ones back home.” Chloe picks up one of the shells and turns it over in her hands. She bets Nadine could name the creatures each of these came from.

“I keep the pretty ones. But we gather shells to grind up for the compost pile usually. Or oyster shells are ground up for the chickens. But the pretty ones are nice.”

“I’ll say.”

“What’s your favourite colour?” Lindiwe asks suddenly.

“Hm? Red, I suppose. Though I’ve grown fond of blue lately too.” Red, she likes because she’s always looked good in it. Warm colours work well for her. As for blue… At some point in the last who knows how long, Chloe has become mushy and cavity inducing, it seems. She likes blue because it reminds her of Nadine. The woman likes to wear muted shades of it fairly often.

Without answering, Lindiwe pops back up on her feet and runs back towards the water. She’s back to combing the shore for shells.

Chloe chuckles and digs her hands into the sand. This is where she should’ve been forever ago. There hadn’t been a chance to head to the beach before leaving on the boat back-- jeez, how many days has it even been? She has a hard time recalling. Another thing to be at least mildly annoyed about when it comes to those damned drugs she has to take.

She’ll ask Nadine later. If she feels up to getting an answer.

Chloe also feels she should probably check in on Nadine. That question before, that  _ “You’re not scared of the water?” _ was worrying. Was she having issues like that? Nadine had been in that wreck and probably had a worse time, emotionally. Chloe, she’d been asleep for it. Nadine had stayed awake and had to live with those changes right away. That couldn’t have been easy on her.

She’ll have to check in, when she gets a chance. Maybe tonight, before bed.

And maybe Chloe convince her to put a bit more aloe on the worst of her bruises. Her ribs are still painful.

Lindiwe bounds back up to Chloe and drops another armful of shells. “I found some red ones and blue ones,” she announces proudly.

Chloe gives the girl a smile as she pokes around in the new pile. There’s a good mix of pretty reds and blues.

“These are lovely. I like this curly one here.”

Lindiwe babbles on a bit about it. Chloe is reminded some of Meenu. Both are young kids who ask too many questions (not that Chloe minds) and both are pretty smart for their age.

She can’t help but wonder what Meenu is up to now. They’d stopped by the last time they were in the area and had gotten to meet her father. He’s a nice, if quiet, man. It probably didn’t help that two strange women showed up to his shop and asked to see his young daughter. But they’d revisited the same pizza shop they’d had after the tusk. It had been a fun little distraction from the job that had them pass through.

“Nadine said you go on adventures. Is that true?”

Chloe blinks, wondering how Lindiwe had gotten to the subject, but she supposes a child’s mind can jump subjects like a frog jumps lily pads.

“It is. I’ve been going on adventures for a long time now.”

Lindiwe’s eyes practically sparkle. “Can you tell me about some?”

“That’s a pretty broad question, kid. Can you narrow down the parameters? I’ve been going on adventures since I was seventeen.”

She seems in awe. “ _ That long _ ?”

Chloe snorts. “I’m not that old, thank you very much.” She doesn’t want to think about how that’s just about two decades of adventures now. “But why don’t you pick an age or something and I’ll tell you something I did around then?”

Lindiwe ponders for a moment before saying, “What about when you were twenty?”

“I think I was in Poland around then. Just outside of Pabianice. I’ll admit I was a worse person back then; I was stealing something from some rich bloke, if I remember right. But I don’t remember what it was.”

“Was it his first?”

“Not really. Most rich folk nowadays steal things from poor people or from minorities who can’t do anything about it. Plenty of their artifacts are ripped from cultures they shouldn’t have been.”

Lindiwe purses her lips and sits hard in the sand. “Then who cares if you took it? He already stole it too. You took it from a bad man.”

Chloe smiles a bit. “Might not be that black and white, sweetheart. I did sell it someone just the same as him after, I’m fairly certain. I just wanted the money from it.”

The child seems to think on that before sighing. “We don’t really have money here. Some of the others taught me about it, but it seems stupid. If you have enough things to keep people fed and happy, why do you keep it from them?”

Chloe has no idea how to answer that. “No clue. The world is kind of messed up out there, for sure. But there’s a lot of good things too.”

“I want to go explore out there, but some things seem scary.”

“There are scary things, but you just have to make sure the right people are around you. I used to be around a lot of crappy people but things got better when I made the right friends.”

“How do you know who’s right?”

Man, this kid asks big questions. How to answer that?

Chloe shrugs. “They treat you right. Make you feel good. Good listeners are always great. My best friend lives in the United States so we can’t see each other often, but it’s always nice to get a phone call from her. And we visit each other whenever we can. She stopped by my flat for a few days a couple months ago.” Elena is always welcome over and Chloe’s made it a point to express that. Nate too, but he and Nadine become a headache if they’re in each other’s proximity too long. It’s getting better though.

“My best friend is Urvi. They’re very good. And they like to play the same games I do. We write stories together for people to read… They’re all silly though. None of them are real like yours.” 

“Silly stories are the best stories. They can be whatever you want them to be.”

“I guess. I want to write stories about the stuff I’ve done though.”

It is, in Chloe’s opinion, much better to live the story rather than write it. At least, so far. She might be interested in writing some more fiction, but she’s also very interested in continuing on her trips with Nadine. The fiction is secondary.

She realizes she’s looking forward to the boat ride home more than she expected. She had already come to the conclusion she could put up with the wait and treat it a bit more like an extended vacation, but now she’s thinking of everything she’s missing out on. And of everyone she’s missing.

Elena probably knows something happened. Does she think Chloe is dead?

Chloe grits her teeth and tries to refocus. She can’t think of that now. She isn’t dead and she’ll be able to assure Elena of that as soon as they’re on the mainland.

“Then write about what you will do. If you’ll climb Mount Everest or go diving on a coral reef. What sort of people you’ll meet. There’s a lot out there.”

“That’s why I want to learn all the languages we have here! So I can talk to the people who speak them out there!”

“Get a job as a translator and you’ll make a ton of money. I’m sure you’ve got a long list of ones already.”

Lindiwe grins. “Yes! And with Nadine teaching me Afrikaans, it’s even longer!”

Speaking of, Nadine is heading back over to them. She’s freshly washed and her damp hair is loose, though frizzy. Chloe doesn’t care. She loves seeing Nadine’s hair down.

“How has the beach been?” she asks.

“Good. Lindiwe here found a ton of shells and I got some much needed sun.”

“You ready to head back? We’ll have dinner before we head for the library.”

Chloe would like to sit on the beach more, but there will be time for that later. They’ve got at least another month on the island.

“Yeah, I guess. Food sounds good, anyway.”

Lindiwe starts scooping up her shells as Nadine helps Chloe off the ground. Again, Chloe insists on being helped to walk, rather than carried. Nadine seems worried by it again, but Chloe needs the walk at this point.

As they grow closer to the house, Nadine speaks up. “Lindiwe, are you joining us for dinner?”

“No thank you! I have to go back to my parents for dinner, but I will see you at the library after!” With that, she shoots off down the path into the center of the village.

Chloe chuckles. “She’s a good kid.”

“She is. She helped me at the barn most of the day.”

“I think you have a fan.”

Nadine hums. “Her grandfather was from South Africa. I think she likes knowing about her family history. Then again, this whole island seems hungry for information. Not a bad thing. Always good to learn more.”

They make it back to the house and Nadine lowers Chloe into a chair. Her crutches are leaned on the wall where Nadine had places them on the way to the bathhouse.

* * *

Over dinner, Nadine can’t help but tell Chloe about her day. It had just been tending animals, but Nadine finds she enjoys it immensely. It’s hard work, and tiring, but that’s the sort of work she’s always preferred. It helps that she gets to be around animals. Cows and goats aren’t exactly exotic, but they’re still good to be around.

Chloe seems to enjoy her talking, at the very least.

Near the end of dinner, as Nadine gathers up the utensils they’ve used, Chloe gives her a look. It’s contemplative and not exactly positive. She’s thinking over something that worries her.

“You cool?”

Chloe quickly changes her expression to something happier. “I’m cool.”

Nadine feels better at that. She heads to wash the dishes when Chloe grabs her arm and pulls her down for a quick kiss. After, Chloe asks, “Think you could rub a little more aloe onto my bruises later? My ribs are still sore.”

“Of course. Want it before the library?”

“Hm. No, after I think. That way I can laze about rather than get aloe all over my clothes.”

Nadine nods. She’s still worried about the bruises that aren’t fading as fast. The smallest bruises are just faint patches of discolouration, not even noticeable if you didn’t know where they were. Her worse ones are still ugly shades of yellow and green. Those are the ones across her shoulder blades. The worst of all are mostly deep purple still. They might be ringed with a bit of green but most are still purple and blue. Those are the ones on her ribs, both on her back and sides.

“It won’t do much more for you in terms of healing, so you know. Would be better if we had arnica or some sort of topical painkiller. But it should give you some relief.”

“Relief is what I need, China.” She motions Nadine over. Nadine, of course, complies, only to be grabbed by the collar of her shirt and tugged down. “Speaking of relief… Isn’t kissing supposed to be an effective painkiller?”

“Thought that was an old wive’s tale?”

Chloe grins. “Well, better to test it out, yeah? Cover all our bases.”

Nadine can’t argue with that, now can she?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took so long. Everything sucks lately lol but I'm trying my best.

Days pass. Chloe heals in the meanwhile, her bruises easing to less and less. The only one that stays painful are those on her ribs. They heal slower than the others, the telltale sign of a cracked rib or two. It’s not the first time she’s had them, so it’s not wholly unfamiliar.

Her ankle is still painful to put weight on, but the gashes on her shin are starting to show real progress in healing. Nadine expresses how thankful she is that it didn’t get infected every time she’s the one to change the bandage.

Chloe is stuck at home again-- or what they call home while they’re here. She really does appreciate the dwelling they’ve essentially been given for the duration, but she wants to keep moving. She wants to go home. Her real home.

She’s watched Nadine here and she seems to feel comfortable doing all of this. Being trapped here. She comes home from her chores practically glowing. The night before she’d stayed out late with Phoebe to relearn navigation via the stars. Even that had been something she’d beamed about.

Chloe adores seeing her like this. Most afternoons, she’s usually sweaty from the effort she’s put in and often is sent towards the bathhouse if it’s obvious she’s been working with the animals again. But Chloe still loves how content, how happy she is.

But Chloe doesn’t understand it. Maybe she’s too much of a free spirit.

The island is small. Besides the library, there isn’t much here that the two of them haven’t seen before. A small village, some animals… Sure, this village is different in some ways, such as each inhabitant knowing multiple languages or each having washed up on shore at some point, but regardless.

Chloe feels curious about it, but she feels curious about a  _ lot  _ of things. That’s not new. She might be able to tolerate their stay on the island more if it weren’t for her damn ankle or how small the part of the island accessible with crutches is.

She’s been using the crutches provided to her more and more often, but there are some places she just can’t go. Finding a spot on the beach is strenuous and usually not worth the effort unless Nadine is helping her. There’s a place on the far end of the village where it’s much easier, as there are disabled people on the island, but the distance makes her ribs burn painfully from the effort.

Every building in the village is reachable by her, but she’s barely met anyone to visit. The one building she might like to visit, the library, isn’t in the village. It’s another trek that leaves her in pain if she doesn’t have help. She’s been walking as much as she can on their trips there every night, but Nadine usually ends up carrying her a third of the way there. It’s that reason alone that she hasn’t tried to make it there herself.

Access to the library without having to sit and write for most of the time would be  _ lovely _ .

Every night, before they leave, Chloe’s been borrowing books and reading them during the day. It’s much better than nothing. There are some genuinely interesting books on the island. Plenty are in languages she knows and most are handwritten. It makes her feel like she’s really leaning into that whole anthropologist angle she’s had these last few years. It makes her think of her dad too, sometimes. He would’ve killed to see this sort of library.

Despite it all, she is still left aching to move.

She wants nothing more than to go out and climb the sheer side of a mountain. She itches to calm the restlessness in her body that causes her to fidget and be as antsy as she is.

Instead, she’s reclined on the bed the wrong way round. She’s  _ bored _ . She can’t think of the last time she was this level bored.

Taliza is supposed to be by soon to change her bandage and check on her ankle. It’s been a bit more swollen than usual these last few days. Chloe would kill for some ice. Or some whiskey. Whichever.

Chloe tries to continue one of the books she’d picked up the night before but she barely makes it a paragraph before she gets, unsurprisingly, bored and puts it aside.

Maybe she’ll head to Taliza instead. At least that way she can move a bit.

She pushes herself up, swings her legs over the side of the bed, and grabs her crutches.

Taliza is a pleasant woman and really the only one Chloe knows at all. She knows some others in passing, but Taliza, as well as her wife Tessa, are the only ones she feels comfortable dropping in on. They’re good people. Even off the island, they’re the types Chloe might go out of her way to keep in touch with.

Taliza reminds Chloe of Elena, a bit. They’re both smaller women that you absolutely do  _ not  _ want to mess with. Taliza also carries the same sort of air that Elena does. They’re both dependable, quick-witted, and the sort to get what needs to be done, done. There are plenty of differences between the two, of course, how they look being the main thing, but Chloe’s glad she can find some semblance of familiarity on the island. It makes the ache of missing Elena less potent.

Tessa, on the other hand, seems to share a lot of things with Nadine. Chloe hasn’t spent as much time with her as she has Taliza, but Nadine has gone fishing with her a few times now. From what Chloe knows, Tessa has a background in the military as well. She’s got similar colouring to Nadine and similar muscle mass-- though Chloe knows Nadine’s muscle is far beyond what anyone else could have in quality. She’s not biased  _ at all _ , really.

The trek farther into the village is a little rocky. She can see evidence of her past walks into the village by way of the circular marks from her crutches. There’d be far more if not for Nadine insisting to carry her whenever they went anywhere together. Chloe enjoys it, but it’s wearing on her a bit, just for the lack of movement it inspires.

Both women are home when Chloe makes it to Taliza’s. Taliza is kneeled in the garden while Tessa is bringing some firewood for the stove inside.

Taliza stands when she notices Chloe coming down the path. “Wasn’t I supposed t’ come t’ you?”

“I was bored.”

She chuckles and nods. “I’ve got ya’. An’ ya’ welcome here wheneva’ you want. You seem like ya’ like t’ keep active.”

“Maybe not so far as that, but I just can’t stand sitting still so much with nothing to do. I feel better if I’m not completely still.”

“I get that.” Taliza wipes the dirt off her hands. “If ya’ ready to change the bandage, we can head inside.”

Chloe hums. “Sure.”

Tessa is inside, stacking the wood she’s just brought in. Chloe wonders if she has cut it or if it is something Nadine helped with at some point.

“Hey, Chloe.”

“Hey, Tessa.”

Once she has washed her hands, Taliza motions her to a chair and pulls another over to prop up Chloe’s leg. “You’re healin’ pretty fast,” Taliza comments as she unwraps the old bandage. “Gonna have a scar once this gets done, but I’m sure you don’t mind much.”

Her wound is just a touch swollen, but it always seems to be this way after a long walk on her crutches. It’s still scabbed over well with no reopening. Chloe has definitely had worse.

“This is the longest an injury has had me down,” Chloe admits. “You’d think my body would have more practice with how many times I’ve been hurt.”

“It’s the otha’ way ‘round. The more you get hurt, the harder it is for flesh t’ heal. Bones, they get stronger with every break. Skin ain’t the same.”

“Huh. Suppose that explains it.”

Taliza raises an eyebrow. “You get hurt a lot?”

Chloe chuckles. “Not more than normal for my line of work, but ask Nadine that and she’ll give you an alphabetized list of every injury I’ve had since we met. A few gunshot wounds, a knife slice here and there… This leg has been banged up before too.”

“Gunshots, huh?” Tessa chimes in. “Where at?”

Chloe shows a line on her upper arm first, before shifting so she can show two small starbursts of paler skin on her stomach. They're timed green from her mostly healed bruises. “My arm was from helping some friends escape a bad situation, stomach was a job gone bad in Peru.”

Tessa tugs her shirt to the side to show a similar type of scar. It’s slanted and a bit messier than Chloe’s clean scars. “Used to be military. I was lucky I didn’t lose my arm or my life from this one.”

Taliza frowns. “It’s betta’ that you’re here, sugar. Can’t do dumb crap like that. Ain’t no guns on this island to take you from me.”

Tessa winks at her. “Nothing is taking me from you.”

Chloe smirks. They’re cute together.

“Nadine is, well,  _ was  _ military too.” Her hands turn to fists as Taliza cleans around her wound. It hurts less than the day before, at least. “Actually-- A job with me is what got her out of it. She chose to join up with me instead of chase down her old position. Family stuff, y’know?”

Tessa hums, maybe in disbelief by the way her expression is.

“Sounds pretty familiar, yeah?” Taliza’s eyes are focused on her work, but she’s got a knowing look on her face.

Chloe purses her lips. “You too, huh?”

Tessa nods. “It was a family thing. Not a single family member of mine wasn’t military. Mom, dad, and all my brothers.”

“All her family too, but all her family is just her dad.”

“You know, that doesn’t explain how you got shot. What sort of “bad job” ends you up there?”

Chloe shrugs and watches as Taliza re-bandages her leg. “Treasure hunting is a dangerous business. We don’t get shot at nearly as much as we have in the past, but it still happens.” She touches a hand to the spot over where the scars are. “This was… Rather than chance, it was-- I’d been caught. Couldn’t move. Angry bloke intended to…  _ force  _ some information out of me. He’d already shot me by the time Nadine swooped in.”

Taliza frowns as she stands up. “Nasty place, the world out there. Glad I’m not part of it.” She huffs as she rubs her palms together. “You’re better off stayin’ away from that business.”

“It’s gotten better since I’ve partnered with Nadine. I get hurt less and get a few more successes.”

The smaller woman just shakes her head and starts to clean up what she’s had to use.

“I’m sure Nadine took care of you after that,” Tessa adds in. She sits across from Chloe at the table. “Being shot leads to a lot of bed rest.”

“She refused to leave me alone at my flat after that-- which,  _ yes _ , I needed help, but I was fine. Eventually.”

Tessa raises an eyebrow.

“Oh, you meant like-- No. None of that, as fun as it would’ve been.” Chloe shrugs. She isn’t even that lucky  _ now _ . “We, uh… Weren’t actually together then. A shame, really. This has been a very recent development.”

That seems to surprise both women. “Doesn’t seem like it,” Taliza admits.

“You two seem pretty far into it. Especially with how she talks about you.”

With a shrug, Chloe lowers her foot down off the chair it’d been propped on and lets it rest on the ground. “We’ve been  _ partners  _ for a good bit. But the-- the proper romance wasn’t until... “ She laughs. “How long have she and I been on the island? Because I have no idea. That medicine of yours makes it hard to keep track.”

“That recent?” Tessa seems completely shocked by that. “No way in hell. You two don’t act like that at all.”

Chloe actually laughs a bit. “We’ve been close since the end of the first job.” The realization hits her and she laughs again before dragging her hand down her face. “Now that I think of it, we’ve been sharing a bed fairly often since then. And she definitely put up with a lot more of my… insistence on certain things than just a friend might.”

“Insistence?”

“Oh, I would always make her sit close when we had movie nights. And I’ve always liked to tease her-- the flirting was always real but she can be a bit dense on that. And like I said, we would share a bed from time to time. I,” she chuckles again. “I would push my luck and crawl in next to her when we shared a hotel room. She’d always act annoyed but I’d wake up with her curled up against me.”

Tessa snorts. “Yeah, you’ve been together longer than your time here in Parádeisos.”

“I’ll say,” Taliza chimes in. “Maybe you’re just as dense as her, yeah? Ain’t got the sense ya’ were born with.”

“She likes to say I wasn’t born with any at all.”

The two women chuckle.

“Well, she hasn’t said anything like that when we fish together.” Tessa smiles. “She says you’re stubborn as all hell, but usually she’s all compliments. She cares about you a lot.”

“I’m lucky for it.”

Chloe hesitates for a moment but decides she may as well. “I actually want to ask you something about you two fishing. You go out on a boat, yes?”

“Yeah.”

“How… Hm. Is she alright when you head out? She said something the other day that has me worried.”

Tessa frowns and fidgets with her hands a bit. “It always takes her a few minutes to get on the boat, if that’s what you mean. The first time was the worst. She’s fine once she’s out there, but stepping onto the boat is always a bit harder for her. It’s no wonder why with what you two went through.”

Chloe frowns. She’d expected as much, honestly. Damn woman making her worry by trying to keep her from worrying. She’s going to have to talk to her when she gets the chance.

“Thanks for telling me… Has she mentioned anything specific for it?”

“She feels responsible for you being hurt.”

That, Chloe does know. Nadine is too damn noble, too willing to  _ take  _ responsibility when no one else will.

“Well, her taking the blame for me getting injured is just as stupid now as it was a few days ago. How the hell were we to know we’d end up here?” Chloe huffs. “I’ll have to talk to her.”

“Go easy. PTSD isn’t her fault.”

Chloe acquiesces on that. “I know. But I can’t do crap if she hides it from me.” A sigh. “I’ll ask her about it later.”

Tessa nods as Taliza takes a seat beside her. “Don’t press too much, but it’s good to let her know she’s not alone with it. At least, that helped for me.” She bumps against her wife’s arm as she says that.

“You two are sweet as honey,” Chloe comments. “It’s disgusting.” The disgust in her voice is obviously fake. “Hope Nadine and I don’t hit that point.”

Taliza lets out an amused huff. “You’re already there. I seen the way she looks ‘atcha. ‘Nd how you’ve been lookin’ at her. Can’t fool a single soul with that.”

Chloe purses her lips. Are they that obvious? There hasn’t been much change in how they treat each other, has there? Honestly, a lot of how Nadine has been-- minus the kissing and the absolutely tantalizing offer in the bath the other day-- is pretty much how she is whenever Chloe is injured. There’s some change because this has been fairly stressful and now they’re lovers as well as partners. It’s not that different is it?

And then Chloe remembers the whole “been together longer than they realized” chat she literally just had with Taliza and Tessa.

Huh.

Lots of realizations today, it seems.

Chloe hangs out with them for an hour or so more. She excuses herself around the time Nadine usually gets back from her work.

While she feels a bit better and a bit less restless, she still can’t help but think on Nadine having trouble on boats. She resolves to bring it up with Nadine as soon as she can. She’s done her best to be as open as she can with Nadine-- with varying degrees of success-- so it’s only fair Nadine is open with her.

And maybe Chloe isn’t the best with feelings talk, not when the feelings are negative, but she needs to work harder on it. May as well do it for someone like Nadine. As far as they’ve come, Chloe knows she’s already a better person for her partnership. That sort of thing seems to just happen when you’re around someone like Nadine. She can’t help but wonder if a romantic relationship will drive her to keep changing for the better more than their partner ship.

Chloe supposes they’ve both changed since the beginning of their time working together. Nadine has certainly grown more affectionate; Chloe  _ loves  _ that. Nadine had gone from professional space to occasional soft touches, to more and more to the point of Chloe being able to crawl into bed with her-- even before their current relationship status. Hell, Chloe’s realization earlier, that Nadine has been this level of protective, of affectionate, for a while… Chloe has definitely taken that for granted.

Chloe feels sort of overwhelmed. How restive she is seems to dull at the warmth these thoughts fill her with. She wants to get to Nadine. Ignore the rest of the world, of the island, for a while and just… be next to Nadine.

Their bed is where she finds Nadine. It looks like she'd collapsed there after her usual shower. One arm is tossed over her eyes to keep the light out. She’s not usually one for naps, but she’d gotten in late after Phoebe’s lesson the previous night.

Chloe gets to the bed and leans her crutches on the wall. She tries to be quiet as she climbs up, but Nadine is a light sleeper.

“Chloe?” she mumbles. Her arm pulls away from her face, revealing a sleepy but happy looking Nadine.

“Morning, sleeping beauty,” Chloe murmurs in a husk. “Didn’t mean to wake you.”

“S’all good. Didn’t mean to fall asleep anyway.”

How Nadine is like this, a bit sleepy but with a happy look on her face, Chloe loves. It’s one of her favourite little ways to see Nadine. Typically, Nadine’s resting expression is near a scowl or at the very least a pout. The unkind might call it a resting bitch face, but Chloe wouldn’t. She knows who Nadine is, and it’s not a bitch. It’s just easier for Nadine if people think she’s scary. Chloe gets that.

But Chloe is in the incredibly privileged position to see Nadine much softer than that. When she feels happy and safe, this is how Nadine is. There’s no scowling or tension. Just a relaxed Nadine.

“What are you staring at?” Nadine mumbles. Her voice is low and groggy from sleep.

Chloe smiles. “Someone who, thankfully, doesn’t smell like a barn. You worked with the animals today, yes?”

“Ja.”

“Thought so.”

Nadine looks so lovely laying back like this. 

Chloe ponders for just a moment before carefully swinging one leg over Nadine and straddling her.

Nadine grunts and her hands fall to rest on the tops of Chloe’s thighs. “What’s this about?”

“Well, Miss Ross, I have some questions for you.”

“ _ Miss Ross _ ?” Nadine says it like it leaves a bad taste in her mouth.

Chloe chuckles. “Would  _ ma’am _ be better?”

Her partner goes a bit pink at that. It  _ is  _ better, looks like, but maybe not in the way Chloe expected.

“Really?” The disbelief in her voice is apparent. “Didn’t the whole army call you ma’am? But  _ that  _ is still your thing?”

Nadine turns a deeper red as she frowns, looking away from Chloe. “Different with you,” she mutters.

That makes some sort of sense, she supposes.

With a laugh, Chloe leans down and kisses Nadine’s cheek. “I will certainly be taking advantage of that information later.”

Impossibly, the woman beneath her turns an even brighter shade of red. Her hands are stiff on Chloe’s thighs; her grip is weighty and grounding. It’s more than a little exciting for Chloe. Maybe she can get them to  _ really  _ do a number on her.

“Eish,” Nadine breathes out.

“So what, you tell me what to do and I need to respond “yes, ma’am” and do it, or you might punish me?” she jokes. “Years of military work and that’s what you’ve ended up with for a kink?”

Nadine’s lips are pursed and she’ll barely meet Chloe’s eyes. “No,” she insists, though Chloe isn’t sure on what part. She certainly, judging by the blush and the tenseness of her body, gets something out of being called it. Maybe it’s the giving orders she’s not here for.

“Hm. Would you rather I give the orders,  _ ma’am _ ?”

The grip on Chloe’s thighs tightens. Nadine’s breathing is a touch faster. She gulps and avoids Chloe’s gaze. Chloe can feel Nadine, all tension and warmth beneath her. Straddling Nadine like this, she gets the wonderful sensation of the woman’s formidable muscle mass against her thighs. Her mind is far from her original task, but how could it not be, with Nadine under her like this?

“Oh, so that’s what it is? I can certainly do that,  _ ma’am _ . I can tell you exactly what to do. I’m quite good at that, you know.”

Chloe’s grin is wide and cocky. She likes having this knowledge of Nadine. She will definitely have to put it to use as soon as she can manage. Maybe within the hour, if she’s lucky.

“ _ Chloe _ .”

Nadine’s murmur sends a rush of warmth through Chloe. Jesus, this woman. She drives her crazy.

“Yes,  _ ma’am _ ?” Chloe leans into the word.

Nadine sighs and meets her eyes again. “Can’t you stop messing with me and ask what you were going to ask?”

Chloe frowns. The air has been officially taken from her sails.

She’d forgotten why she was where she was.

“First off… Not messing with you, dearest. Knowing what you like is pretty damn important if I’m ever going to get a proper chance to seduce you.” Nadine gulps at that. “And the questions...ugh. Mood killers.”

Nadine looks up at her, curious now. She seems to have gotten herself under control from Chloe’s teasing. Well deserved teasing, mind you, with Nadine’s whole thing in the bath a few days previous.

Chloe realizes she could probably check in with a simple “you cool?”, but it feels wrong. She needs to  _ actually  _ check in. “You cool?” is short and sweet for a reason; when they use it, they give a choice of going into detail or not. Chloe needs detail. At least some. Not a quiet “I’m cool”.

Chloe takes a deep breath. “Tessa said you have trouble getting on the boat when you help her fish.”

Nadine grits her teeth and mutters a soft “eish”. “Can we go back to you messing with me?”

That doesn’t make Chloe feel terribly confident about the answer she’ll get.

“Nadine, I… I need to know what’s up. I can’t stand thinking you’re hiding the…  _ issues  _ from the wreck.”

“I-- I have talked to you about it. Before. When Taliza gave me the aloe for you.”

Chloe frowns. “A short conversation-- not enough. I just need… confirmation, about a few things. And--” She sighs, ragged. She isn’t angry, just a little annoyed. She’s trying to be better. “ I just… I’m not good with people, you know that. We both know that. But I want to be good with you. Part of that is, well, knowing what’s going on with you.”

Nadine isn’t meeting Chloe’s eyes again. She’s withdrawn her hands from Chloe, making the woman ache at the loss. She crosses her arms over her chest.

“Nadine, I-- I wouldn’t have known about it if I hadn’t gotten a weird feeling about something you said the other day. If I hadn’t caught it, I wouldn’t know.” Chloe sighs. “I just want to… make sure, you know?”

Nadine’s eyes flash up to meet hers for a moment before looking away again. “Didn’t want to trouble you.”

With a huff, Chloe crosses her arms. “Nadine Ross, I’m fairly certain us being in a relationship means things that trouble you are  _ supposed  _ to trouble me.” She turns her said to the side and softens her voice. “You’ve worried over me since I was hurt. Let me return the favour.”

Finally, Nadine sighs. She uncrosses her arms and lets them rest on her chest.

Before she can actually say anything, Chloe cuts in again. “But if you want to take time to talk, you can. I guess. I just… Mostly need a promise you’ll come to me when you need me. I want to be there for you, Nadine.”

Nadine seems to respond to that. “I… I’m sorry, Chloe. Eish, I should’ve brought it up. But there’s… Ek weet nie. Didn’t want you to think less of me.”

Chloe actually laughs.

A scowl hits Nadine’s face but Chloe shakes her head.

“Think less of you? That’s  _ rich _ , China. Please explain how I would ever think less of you. Actually, don’t. I can guess.” She counts on her fingers as she speaks. “If you tell me how messed up you are about it, more than just blaming yourself, I might think you’re not strong or something silly like that. Two, related to point one, you think I might leave you for something silly like that. Which is preposterous. Three--”

“Alright, you don’t have to count it out.”

“You sure? Because, and I mean this with all the warmth I can muster, you can be a bit dense.”

“Ja, I’m sure.” She still seems… not angry, exactly, but far from comfortable.

Chloe realizes her positioning means Nadine can’t make an escape if she wants to. Chloe doesn’t want her to, but she gets needing that space. She-- She really doesn’t want Nadine to go. She would rather get some sort of comfort in how Nadine is feeling.

But she should give Nadine the choice on that, yeah?

She starts to climb off, but Nadine grabs her hips and holds her there. “No, don’t… Stay. Please.”

Chloe settles back down. “I wasn’t going to leave. Just thought you might like to.”

“I… No. I don’t. I just don’t know what you want me to say.”

Why are emotions so goddamn tough to deal with? Chloe isn’t used to this sort of thing. In the past, she’s always had Elena to call for this sort of thing. Elena, smart and emotionally competent Elena, has been her go-to for figuring out her emotions and knowing how to stop from fucking up her partnership with Nadine. Chloe had been a very different person before meeting Elena.

Maybe she needs to make some of that growth on her own.

Uncharacteristically, Chloe hesitates. “I’m not going to make you talk right now. But can you promise me that you…” She sighs. “I’m here, Nadine. I’m not going anywhere. Promise to remember that, yeah? That you’ll come find me if you need to?”

Nadine meets her eyes. “Ja. I can promise that.”

Chloe relaxes. “Good. Great.” She takes a deep breath and sighs. “Just think! We’ll be home in no time! Where there’s chocolate and white pear tea and, and-- pizza. And… maybe you’d like to spend some time in my flat? Or we can go to yours?”

Nadine looks, not uneasy, but like she’s holding something back. When she doesn’t respond fast enough, Chloe changes the option.

“Unless you’re sick of me?”

She laughs in disbelief. “Jislaaik! No, Chloe. I’m not sick of you.”

“Ah, well, I’ll have to try harder, won’t I?”

They both laugh then, tension well and dissolved now. Chloe lets herself fall forward so she’s got one hand on either side of Nadine’s head. She meets her partner’s eyes and asks once more:

“You cool?”

Nadine sighs. “I’m cool.”

Chloe feels better with this one. Nadine is actually some sort of managed right now. It’s all Chloe can really ask. She has to believe Nadine will come to her when she needs help or comfort. It’s far better than the alternative. Chloe can trust her to do this. She’s always been able to trust Nadine.

For now, Chloe thinks she’s done for the day thinking on things that emotionally exhaust her. She could go for some physical exhaustion. She’s even got a solution to that, pinned beneath her. Nadine is still looking utterly gorgeous there. Her hair is splayed behind her head. Chloe is rather partial to how she’s been wearing it down lately.

Nadine looks up at her, surely curious about what’s passing through Chloe’s head right now.

Chloe kisses her.

Nadine seems to melt against her. Her grip tightens on Chloe’s hips and pulls her closer. Chest to chest, Chloe hooks her arms around Nadine.

When they part a moment later, it’s brief, enough for Chloe to gasp out, “Think Phoebe will be angry if we’re late to the library?”

“She-- She gave us the evening off. Since we’ve been going for a bit.”

Chloe presses another brief kiss to Nadine’s lips before moving across her jaw and down her neck. “Sounds like plenty of time for us to have some fun, hm?”

Nadine doesn’t answer in words, but in tangling one hand in Chloe’s hair and urging her on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Definitely getting closer to the end of it now.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anyway, after some shitty times and lots of hours at work, I'm finally updating again.
> 
> Quick reminder: my stories are not for terfs or any transphobes, as this is all written by a trans person :)

Chloe wakes up in a better mood than she has at all on the island. She still aches some, what with the strain she’d put on herself the day prior, but she can stand it for the pleasant hum through her. For now, at least, the unrelenting need to move and explore is muffled.

She’s woken early, it seems, as Nadine is getting dressed for her day at the side of the bed.

“Morning, China,” Chloe greets. Her voice is rough from sleep. "I think I like waking up to this sight."

Nadine smiles at her. “Goeie more, Chloe.”

“Fishing today?”

“Think so, ja.”

Chloe sits up and stretches. She doesn’t miss Nadine’s glance over her as she does it. She almost wants to put on a show. Careful not to put pressure on her injured ankle, she moves to the side of the bed.

“Do you think, if I see you off at the dock, it might help what we discussed yesterday?”

Nadine freezes and the smile drops from her face. This obviously isn’t something she wants to think about first thing in the morning.

“I don’t want to make you head out that far,” she concludes. It’s not an answer.

“But would it help you? So you know I’m right there, watching you head out for the day.” Chloe tilts her head. “I don’t mind the walk. Hell, I need it.” She grins. “I can’t spend _all_ my excess energy on you, fun as it is.”

With pursed lips, Nadine shrugs. “If you want, I won’t say no.”

“Excellent. Mind handing me something to wear? This body is only on show for you, thank you very much.”

That gets Nadine’s lips twitching up, almost a smile. “I appreciate that.”

Once they’re both dressed, Chloe grabs her crutches. She intends to get every bit of use she can from the damn things. They’re her current key to the freedom of movement.

“I-- I’ll carry you if you want,” Nadine offers.

With a shake of her head, Chloe makes her way to the door. “I’ll have to walk back without you anyway. Besides, I need the exercise. I’m tired of lazing about. There’s not much to occupy me here when you’re out.”

Nadine nods. She seems to understand that.

“Alright. Let me know if you get tired, ja?”

“Yes, darling, I promise. Now, come on. I’m sure Tessa is waiting for you.”

They chat as they walk. It’s mostly idle chatter about the jobs Nadine has been doing on the island. Chloe’s heard plenty already, but Nadine loves to go on about her work in the barn. Every day she’s worked with the animals, she’s come back with another funny little story about one of the goats or about a sheep doing something cute. Chloe likes seeing her excited. It’s been hard in the past to get this side of her to show. When they’d first started working together, Nadine had seemed embarrassed about this passion of hers. It had taken time for her to trust that Chloe wouldn’t make fun of her for it. Chloe is certain more partners than less had done so. She’d fight them if she could.

They reach the dock soon enough, though Chloe knows it has probably taken a lot longer with her in tow.

Tessa is waiting on the dock. She’s got the boat ready to go. When she sees Chloe, she smiles.

“Seeing us off today?”

Chloe nods. “Yup. Gave me an excuse to go for a walk.”

Nadine remains silent. Chloe isn’t sure if it’s because she knows that both other women know she’s got some issue with boarding the boat or if it’s something else.

“I expect you to bring her back in one piece now, Tessa. I need her in her best shape.”

Tessa laughs. “Of course. And we’ll bring back dinner too.”

“Sounds like a plan.” Chloe turns to Nadine. “Kiss before you go?”

Nadine seems to snap out of it a little at that. She nods and leans in for a quick kiss. It’s chaste, no more than a peck on the lips. After, she turns to hop on the boat but turns back to Chloe before she gets on. “I…”

“I’ll be right here when you get back, darling. Go on.”

Nadine nods and then gets on the boat. She keeps her eyes on Chloe as they steer themselves out into the water.

Chloe blows her a kiss before heading back towards the house.

That had gone better than expected, honestly. She hopes they’ll keep figuring it out. This is, undeniably, the best relationship she’s had. And that’s when they’ve only just started the more romantic and sexual part of their relationship. Nadine is worth the work. Scary as it is.

Chloe’s way is slow going back to the house. Her ribs are barely starting to burn which absolutely has to mean they’re healing. Or at least used to her getting the exercise.

And maybe it’s because she’s feeling so positive, or maybe fate just loves to mess with her, her crutch catches on a root. She topples, her shin hitting the ground painfully. She cries out and clutches at it. Her ankle is throbbing and her healing gash is stinging.

Someone is over to her a moment later. She doesn’t recognize them as someone she’s met, but they help get her off the ground.

“Can-- Can you help me get to Taliza’s?”

They agree, thank goodness, and let her lean on them as she’s guided to Taliza.

She’s set down in a chair as Taliza approaches her.

Taliza purses her lips. “Ain’t how you’re supposed t’ go ‘bout this healin’ thing, sugar.”

Chloe frowns. “I fell on my way back from the docks.” It’s said through clenched teeth. “I certainly didn’t mean to.”

Taliza eases Chloe’s leg up to rest on another chair. “All pain in the same spots?”

Chloe nods.

Taliza walks around Chloe and pokes at her a bit, examining the spots she knows Chloe had been injured before. Once satisfied, she slowly unwraps the bandage to reveal Chloe’s shin. The wound is unopened, though it’s swollen and red. Her ankle too is obviously more swollen than it has been in the last week. Not terribly more, but more.

“I’m worried ya’ broke something in the initial injury. Ain’t much we can do for breaks here, not on a joint like this.”

“I-- I’ll be fine. I’ve had worse. I just… Ugh. Might need some painkillers 'til the swelling is down.”

Taliza nods and heads into another room. A moment later, she returns. “We’ll get ya’ on some medicine, then back t’ your bed. Rest an’ elevation should be fine t’ get you feelin’ right again.”

Chloe can’t believe she’s already back to this. Just this morning, she was moving as she needed to. One trip and suddenly she’s helpless again. She hates it.

“Christ... Alright.”

“Don’ worry, Chloe. It’s gonna be just fine.”

* * *

Nadine comes back feeling better than she has the last few times she’d gone out on the boat. Their haul is good. There’s no chance anyone on the island will go hungry tonight.

She and Tessa bring the fish where they’re needed before both heading back. As Nadine says a simple goodbye to Tessa, Taliza calls out to her.

“Check on ya woman for me, will ya’?”

Nadine raises an eyebrow. “Ja. Any reason?”

“She took a spill earlier. Had a bit a’ painkiller to ease it for the evenin’.”

She frowns. “She was hurt.”

Taliza shakes her head. “Nah, just twinged it a bit. She ain’t whingin’ or nothin’. Just needed a little relief.”

Nadine purses her lips and heads off before Taliza can say much more.

Anxiety sets in again. She’s suffered from it less here on the island; for the most part, it’s only gotten at her when out on the boat or when changing Chloe’s bandages. And, well, when thinking too much on Chloe’s injuries. This is certainly one of those times.

Chloe reinjuring her ankle could make a lot of this more complicated. If she’s too unstable, they might not be able to leave in the planned time frame. Nadine is all too aware of how badly Chloe wants to get home.

Chloe is in bed when Nadine finally reaches the house. She’s got her ankle raised on a pillow, which Nadine is glad to see. She’s also got one arm tossed over her face to block the light from her eyes. There's a thin blanket tossed over her. She seems to be asleep.

Nadine gently lifts the cover from off Chloe's injured foot. It looks no worse for wear, but it's hard to tell with it bandaged.

"Good to see you back, China."

Nadine starts. She looks up to see Chloe looking back at her. She's moved her arm just enough to peek one of her dusty blues in Nadine's direction.

"Taliza said you got hurt."

Chloe waves that thought off. "Just took a bit of a spill. Hurt like hell for a short bit, but Tal gave me some more of that painkiller."

"Is the world still… what's the phrase you used?"

"Wobbly?"

"Ja."

"Not really. If I'm not sober, I'm about five minutes from it." She hides her eyes under her arm again and uses her free hand to pat the bed beside her. "Join me?"

Nadine is still worried about Chloe's injury. "Can… Can I give you a once over? Make sure you’re alright?”

Again, Chloe waves her off. “Taliza checked on me. I’m fine.”

Nadine frowns but lays down in the spot beside Chloe.

“How was fishing? Feeling okay?”

“Ja.”

Chloe lifts her arm again to look over at Nadine. “I don’t mind waking up a bit early if it gives you some peace of mind, you know.”

With a shrug, Nadine moves herself a bit closer. Chloe hums in appreciation and rests her head on Nadine’s shoulder.

“I know.”

They lay there in the quiet together for a few long minutes. Nadine feels she really should get up and find something to do. But there’s less rush here on the island. Nothing is keeping her from simply laying in bed beside the woman she loves.

It’s long enough like this that Nadine thinks Chloe may have fallen asleep, but then Chloe says, “Do you ever wonder about this place?”

“Like how?”

“Just… in general. An island hidden by storms… A whole mess of ethnicities and traces of cultures all under an overlying ancient Greek sort of deal.” Chloe looks down at herself. She’s wearing a simple garment that is so completely “ancient greek” she can barely believe it. “Tessa is American, yeah? But Taliza is… Well, I’m not certain. Her accent has greek elements, certainly, but whatever she was born to is there as well. Maybe something in the area of Latin America, but there’s really no way for me to tell without asking. And your young friend, Lindiwe. South African roots and all. I’ve seen well more than that too.”

Chloe takes Nadine’s hand and fidgets with her fingers, tracing idly on her palm.

“Some of the books you brought me mentioned Egyptians, Arabians, and more. While everything I’ve seen seems to be primarily greek, there’s influence in building techniques from all sorts of other places. Some of the houses look incredibly Tibetan inspired which would imply that a person from Tibet ended up on the island at some point. That or the less likely option of chance evolution of their building preferences lining up with those of Tibet.”

“Speaking of evolution,” Chloe continues. “The way the standard Greek default that they must have begun with has changed over the years not only affected by the people joining their island, but by the increasingly advanced objects washing up on shore in the last who knows how many decades. It’s to the point you would think what they have would end up their entirely own thing. And it is! In a way. But so much of the Greek origins are held onto that, you know, can feel what this place grew from.”

“And even more, the religions on the island are heavily polytheistic. Many still worship the Greek gods, but I saw some Christian iconography as well as Buddist. And there’s what I believe is a small synagogue at the edge of the main body of the village. You’d know better than I. All of these coexist just fine. Historically, that rarely happens.” She purses her lips. “There’s so much here that shouldn’t be able to exist, but it does. This… This place was founded well before, before… the United States and will likely outlive it as well. It’s obviously outlived so much more.” 

“You’ve been thinking about this a lot, haven’t you.” Nadine doesn’t say it as a question. She likes to listen to Chloe’s thoughts about this sort of thing. “Ever the anthropologist.”

Chloe chuckles. “Maybe I should have made a degree out of it.”

“You could teach a class all on your own.”

“Hm, why bother? I’ve got my favourite student right next to me.”

“But I don’t pay you for the lessons.”

A grin. “I’ll write up a bill for you as soon as we’re back. That’ll make it worth it.”

Nadine lets out a soft laugh. “Can I get a discount since I’m dating you?”

Chloe purses her lips and thinks on it. “Five percent off.”

“Only five percent?” Nadine snorts. “I’d get more financial aid from the United States government.”

Her partner laughs. “How about… Your discount is inversely related to the percentage of clothing you’re wearing?”

With a raised eyebrow, Nadine props herself up on her elbow. “How so?”

“The more clothing you’re in, the less of a discount you get.”

“Seems like you want to take advantage of me, liefie.”

Again, Chloe makes that dismissive gesture with her hand. “No, no, I just find it an even exchange. In fact, I feel like you haven’t paid at all for my thoughts on the island.”

Nadine scoffs but dips in to kiss Chloe. When they part, she gives a fake annoyed little, "You can just ask for a kiss, you know."

"Where's the fun in that? Now, come on. Give me more of that down payment."

She rolls her eyes but leans back in.

This time, Nadine stands after the kiss. “I’ll make us some food.”

“Thanks, darling.”

By an hour later, Chloe is completely sober. She’s feeling better than she expected after her fall, but it’s normal amounts of pain in her leg for its injury. It could have been much worse.

Despite feeling better, Nadine is practically doting on her. She seems to anticipate Chloe’s needs so Chloe doesn’t have to move as much. It’d be charming if Chloe wasn’t feeling restless again. Napping is one thing, but not moving at all? She might even go for a run if she was able. Well, perhaps she wouldn’t go that far, but she would love to, to… _do_ something. Besides sleep with Nadine, as good as that is. 

Nadine brings her some food before taking the seat beside her.

They chat a bit. Nadine tells Chloe about her day. It’s not terribly different from the standard fishing trips she’s been going on, but Chloe still listens. Nadine always seems so excited about the things she’s able to spend time on while on the island. Today’s fishing trip seems to have gone better for her than usual. Chloe hopes there’s less trouble in the future, that they’ve made a dent or even just a scratch in the surface of what Nadine suffered in the accident.

Still, though, Nadine isn’t nearly as happy about the fishing as she is when she spends her whole day at the barn. There’s always something she finds cute or exciting from the farm animals. Chloe finds it rather adorable. Nadine may have started her life in a military family, but she was born to be around animals. It’s clear as day to anyone who watches her for a few minutes whenever she interacts with a friendly animal. Her typical resting expression, a slight frown, disappears whenever she’s around them. Hell, Chloe can’t remember seeing it at all in the last few days, save for after Nadine had heard she’d taken a fall. She has to wonder; does it have anything to do with the island they’re trapped on, rather than the animals she sees daily? 

Is Nadine happier here than she had been on the mainland?

“Chloe?”

Chloe shakes the thoughts from her head. “Ah, sorry. What’d you say?”

Nadine gives her a worried look. “That we should head to the library shortly. You alright?”

She nods. “I’m fine. Just spaced out a bit.” Taking a deep breath, she scoots to the edge of the bed. Nadine is already there to take her empty dish. “I must’ve slept longer than I thought. I didn’t realize it was already time to go.”

Nadine gives that look Chloe knows well. It’s full of worry and care and, usually, makes Chloe feel good. Today, Chloe feels irritated by it. She’s not sure why.

She grabs her crutches and takes a deep breath. Her leg is still in more pain than usual after the medication has faded, but it’s not as bad as it has been. She wants to get moving again. Maybe it’ll make her get past whatever frustration she can feel building in her.

“I… can I carry you?”

Chloe looks up, already not having it. “Nadine, I’ve been in bed all day. I need to move.”

“I know, liefie, I’m just worried--”

“I’m not incompetent, Nadine! I can manage a walk.”

“I, I know. Jirre, I know. I just want to make sure things don’t get--”

“Nadine!” Chloe snaps. She grits her teeth and looks away. “Actually, you know what? I’m still tired. I’ll stay here.” She sits back down and turns away from Nadine.

“Chloe…”

“Go, Nadine. Phoebe is expecting you.”

Chloe lays down.

Nadine seems to struggle to find words, managing only a quiet “Chloe”. When Chloe doesn’t respond, she leaves.

* * *

Nadine feels sick to her stomach.

She’s had disagreements with Chloe before. Hell, their first job together consisted of quite a few of them. From the issue at Asav’s base to the lie Chloe had told her. Other arguments had happened, of course, in the time they’ve been partners. For the most part, they’ve worked past them. They work well together and Nadine enjoys the relationship they’ve formed on it.

This time feels different.

Chloe is angry with her. That’s obvious. Nadine only sort of understands why. Well, she thinks she does.

She’s slow in reaching the library. Lindiwe and Urvi are both there before her. Both are chatting together when she approaches. She gives them a small smile. “Just us tonight, kids.”

“Is Chloe okay?”

“She’s just tired,” Nadine responds. It’s not the truth, but Nadine knows it’s best not to worry children over things like this. “She’ll be back with us tomorrow, I’m sure.” Hopefully, that’s not a lie.

“What should I write?” Urvi asks. “I usually help Chloe.”

Nadine gives Urvi a friendly smile. “I’m sure I can think of more for you. She and I have had a few adventures since we met. I could share one of those."

Urvi nods. "Okay!"

Lindiwe has already opened her journal and started scribbling away. She's taken to practising her Afrikaans in this way. She rights out sentences and has Nadine look them over.

Nadine chats with them and gets back to her own book. She's already filled one with all sorts of animal facts. She included how the nearest relatives of whales are artiodactyls; meaning hooves animals like cows, pigs, and deer. She's picked up a bit of prehistoric animal information in the things she reads. She enjoys imparting it to the others in this way. She doesn't know how much fossil information has reached the island, but surely she's broadened someone's horizons with it.

The new journal, however, she starts differently. Her first page is her feelings on fighting. Her true ones, not the ones she's acted with for a large amount of her life. She rights on how, despite being raised as a soldier, she's always found fighting to leave her wanting. She's good at it, no doubt, but she's realized lately that her heart hadn't been in it. She had pretended as such, surely. She had given orders, fired guns, and stood at the side of her men for as long as she could.

Nadine finds it easy to admit life on the island has struck her as more fulfilling. She includes that on the page before moving into a few short reasons why. Things simply make sense here. The able-bodied do the heavy work and provide for those who can't. People help each other as needed. It's a quiet place where people are believed to be good from birth. Her experiences off of the island are nothing like that. There are good people still, of course. But trust is not easily found.

Once Nadine has said her part on that, she goes into her vast knowledge of the art of war. Here, her pictures are different. She draws guns she can take apart in seconds but avoids detail. She draws things that have soaked into her memory from her life trained in the dangers of fighting and guns. These get barely a fourth of the effort she put into her animal drawings. She doesn't count herself an artist, but she tries with what feels right. Little barely formed line drawings showing an injury sustained from a certain type of weapon.

With medical care, Nadine goes into detail. She's well trained as a combat medic, at her father's insistence. There's more than her fair share of experience with injuries in her past. Most are Chloe's injuries; at least, ever since meeting her.

Much of what she rights, she knows Taliza already knows, but she hopes there will be something that can help the doctor. She also hopes that there’s never an instance where the woman has to treat bullet wounds of all things. The island is peaceful. Nadine would like to think it’ll stay that way.

Nadine tries her best to focus on this and what she’s sharing with the kids. There’s still that anxiety sitting in her gut about the early… Was it an argument? A butting of heads? Whatever it was between her and Chloe. Every time she thinks about it, that flutter of nervousness gets worse. 

She does her best to ignore it until it's late enough to head back. She realizes she may have overstepped. Chloe has been expressing how she has felt trapped lately. Or maybe there’s something Chloe isn’t telling her? Nadine doesn’t know. She wishes she had her phone. She usually talks to her father when she has this sort of issue. Rarely ever about what’s troubling her, but he’s good at helping her get in the right mindset to fix things.

She misses him. Maybe she can convince Chloe along for a visit after they get off the island.

But first, she’ll have to see what’s wrong between them.

Nadine resolves to actually talk to Chloe about this when she gets back home.

* * *

It's been a good long while since Chloe had a stress headache. She doesn't like remembering how one tends to feel.

She's not even sure if it's stress or because she snapped at Nadine, or, or, _what_. Again, Chloe feels like ants are crawling under her skin but worse. They're not just making her restless, they're also crowding her brain until the pressure is more than she wants to bare. She feels like she's being coddled and she absolutely refuses to be coddled at this point. She, she knows Nadine just wants to protect her, but damnit, she doesn't need protecting from every damn little thing! Walking, even while using crutches, helps her stay in shape. It helps her feel a little less trapped and useless. And, potentially, it could help her avoid thinking about Nadine being happier on the island.

That definitely isn't the real problem here. Mostly because she refuses to think about it.

Even if there's evidence to back it up, Chloe has no interest in thinking about it. Nope. She doesn't want to think about the relaxed expression Nadine has now whenever she's staring off into the distance. She doesn't want to think about how quickly Nadine has adapted to this life. And she really doesn't want to think about how well Nadine seems to fit with the locals.

No, Chloe refuses to think about all that. It's not denial, it's… something else. She doesn't care to name it.

(It's denial.)

Chloe grabs her ink and her journal and sits at the table. She can get something done. She can be some sort of useful, surely.

Her words feel choppy and incomplete. She knows how to say what she wants to convey, but she feels as though her writing is like an elephant trying to pick up an exercise ball; inelegant, difficult, and prone to falling short.

She tries to push through it. She has plenty to say, after all, but her flow feels like it's dried up. She starts to write the next part of the tale, but then her mind inevitably gets caught up on Nadine. Nadine who, to her, is usually such a wonderful subject of thought, feels like the scariest path her brain could take. Chloe ends up getting frustrated again and angry, and she has no idea how to stop it or fix it.

There's a little part of her, one she's long ignored by now, that suggests she put an end to the whole thing. It's easier to be alone. It's easier to keep that distance and never deal with this sort of thing. Whatever this is.

But then, as soon as the thought hits her, she vehemently rejects it. She nearly sobs at the thought. Chloe, she isn't the person she used to be. She's never been so happy as she has been just being Nadine's business partner. Now that it's more, she can't think of something worse than losing her.

She's never missed Elena more than she does right now. The little blond has always been great at talking her through things like this. Sure, Chloe knows she needs to, to _communicate_ , but she's so bloody bad at it. Elena has always helped her get the wording right or figure out what's really wrong. If she could just call her up like normal, Chloe would know how to fix things in an instant, surely.

Chloe vacillates between blaming herself for snapping and blaming Nadine for the way the damn woman has to act like she's more fragile than glass. Obviously they should talk, right?

Elena would tell her they need to talk. "Chloe, just tell her why you're feeling this way, she'll understand." That's what Elena would say, surely. But the damn woman always overestimates Chloe's abilities. It's flattering, but Chloe hadn't been able to even say a proper sorry to Nadine back in India. How the hell is she supposed to do something this much harder? More than just a business relationship is at risk now.

Tired of her roundabout thoughts, all circling like rabid wolves and taking chunks from her mind, Chloe focuses as much as she can on her writing.

She flips a few pages past what she already has and starts something new. Folk tales. Myths. Anything she can to distract herself or amuse herself.

Chloe starts at the ones she knows best. There are a plethora of stories she had been told as a child that she still knows by heart. They’re the stories of her father’s people, of her people, that have been around for centuries. It feels nice to reminisce on them. She doodles a bit too, all based on things she remembers being shown as a child. There’s plenty of things to write down as there are plenty of stories of gods and demons and more.

She gets through a few before jumping to something new. She’s not sure what makes her think of it, but she goes to the kappa, a water demon from Japan. She’s stumbled on the myth a few months back, before a job Nadine and she had gone on in Japan. This one, she has a bit of fun trying to draw it. It was said to have the body of a turtle, arms and legs of a frog, a beak, and a small bowl-like spot on its head filled with water. And it’s also said to steal disobedient children. Obsessed with manners, a deep bow could defeat one because the water would spill from its head. There are various places in Japan that claim to have a mummified one.

She hops over to a Danish creature after that. The sea-monk; a fish that resembled a monk in his habit. She includes all the bits and bobs she’s learned on it. There are the bits of controversy over the specimen said to be caught in the sixteenth century. There’s the rivalry between a couple of artists said to have seen it. And then there’s the belief it was probably just an angel shark.

And because Chloe’s mind is tired, Chloe’s mind goes to Nadine. If Chloe mentioned an animal name-- leopard, sheep, or shark-- Nadine would give her a few facts on it. Like when she’d gone on the dive. Nadine had told her what the animals were with barely a description.

At the thought of Nadine, and how Chloe needs to do something to fix things despite not feeling up to it, the stress headache comes back.

Chloe sets the pen aside and sighs. She rubs her hands over her face and decides she’s done for the night.

Chloe climbs into bed. It takes too long for her to fall asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Don't forget, you can find me as Chloe-gayzer on tumblr!


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We are nearing the end, my friends!

Chloe wakes early in the morning. The sun hasn’t even started to rise when her eyes open. She can’t remember the dream that’s caused her to wake. All she knows is she feels sick to her stomach in a way she rarely feels. It’s not physical sickness but some annoying trace of the anxiety and anger sitting in her gut.

Nadine is still asleep. She’s not touching Chloe where she lays, but she is curled close at Chloe’s back. Protective, almost.

It sort of makes Chloe angry.

As quietly as she can, Chloe pulls herself out of bed. Her leg is no longer burning as it had when she’d fallen the previous morning. She grabs up her crutches and makes her way out of the house. The fact Nadine doesn’t wake up is a testament to Chloe’s skill in stealth; it’s something the two of them joke about, her being a bull in a china shop. But it’s not terribly true. She’s just gotten herself out of a one-room house with a light sleeping ex-mercenary nearby, all without waking said ex-mercenary. It’d be a lie to say she wasn’t some sort of good with stealth. She is a thief, after all. And a damned good one at that.

Chloe heads off.

She needs it. She needs the movement, the fresh air, and the quiet. And, at least a bit, she needs the solitude this early morning, or perhaps late-night, can provide her.

Space. She needs space. She hasn’t really had any in the time they’ve been on the island.

At a loss for anywhere else to go, Chloe heads towards the library.

The walk is long. It wouldn't be if she had use of both legs, but with her on crutches, she stops occasionally to rest. Her ribs start to ache not long into the walk, which makes the resting necessary. It reminds her of the few weeks after India and the Western Ghats when she’d had a few cracked ribs to take care of. Her ankle itself seems fine, at least. She's not putting any weight on it. She knows better than to do that.

She slips into the library and gets herself to their usual table. It seems they'd left some of their work out. The journal Nadine is working in is out, as are both from the children. There's an ink bottle out but no quills. A couple candles sit out as well. She lights one.

Chloe dips into the cupboard she's seen Phoebe in countless times now and gets herself a fresh journal and a quill.

Sitting back down at the table, she writes.

This time, she doesn't write about things she's done or places she's seen, but she writes what she wants to. She dips back into the fictions she would scrawl out as a child and fills pages with her own creations. It sates her, for now. It's easier to ignore the restless feeling in her bones when her mind is completely and totally preoccupied. It’s why healing at home had never been this difficult. She would simply play games on her phone. She doesn’t have that luxury here.

The quiet of the library lit only in candlelight puts Chloe at ease, for the time being. It supplies her with the solitude she had wanted for. All the movement she needs is that of her quill across the paper. And as for the fresh air, she finds the air in the library more than qualifies. It may not be fresh, per se, but there's an ever-present scent of old books tinged with the wind off the sea they're surrounded by. She can't think of a more comfortable place to be in this moment.

* * *

Nadine wakes up alone.

It takes her a moment to realize the bed is empty but for her once she's opened her eyes. She sits up quickly. The rest of the little house is empty as well. Resting her hand on the bed, she finds Chloe's spot cold.

She's been gone for a while. She’d snuck out while Nadine was sleeping and now...

Nadine squeezes her eyes shut and sighs. She had already replayed much of their argument in her head before falling asleep. Not even an argument, really. She doesn't want to do that again, but how could she stop herself?

She had been so pushy. She had tried too hard to insist Chloe needed the help to travel and… Ugh. She shouldn't have acted that way.

Nadine can't even find it in herself to be angry with Chloe for her reaction. If anything, Nadine is worried. This is an island, she knows, but where would Chloe have gone? Should she try to find her? She could apologize that way. But what if Chloe doesn't want to see her at all? What if seeking her out this very moment would make it worse? Or, terrifyingly, what if Chloe has decided their relationship isn't what she's looking for? Has Nadine fucked this all up?

Nadine grits her teeth and climbs out of bed. She's got a headache.

At a loss, she decides to go about her morning as she normally would. That means getting dressed and heading to the barn.

Nadine can give Chloe space. It’s better for both of them, isn’t it? A little breathing room to think. Every couple needs that sometimes, Nadine tries to tell herself. So she’s going to get to work with the animals and later, she’ll find Chloe.

She hopes this is the right decision.

* * *

Chloe starts as a bowl is placed beside her on the table. She looks up to see Phoebe.

“You are here very early.”

She shrugs. “I needed somewhere to be alone. I apologize. I can leave if I’m in the way.”

Phoebe shakes her head and sits across from Chloe with her own bowl of food. “The library is open to all.”

Chloe sets her quill aside to pull the food she’s been given closer. It smells delicious. “I appreciate that. And the food.” Her stomach rumbles at the thought. She’s been here for hours. She hadn’t really thought ahead to food when she had headed here. It’s a good thing for her Phoebe is a kind person, she supposes.

“Of course.” Phoebe’s eyes go over the journal Chloe has been writing in. “Have you filled your first one?”

“Ah, no. This is actually… I apologize, but I took another. This one-- it’s all stories. Just… Little ones I made up.” She shrugs. “I used to do this sort of thing when I was younger. Sort of impulsively trying again.”

Phoebe gives her a kind look. “We welcome any new reading material. Every piece you give us will find a home here in the library.”

Chloe manages a smile at that. “I’m honoured.” She leans back in her seat and lets her gaze pass over the shelves. “You keep every bit of literature that comes your way, yeah? Anything that washes up that’s salvageable?”

“We do. I cannot say all are worth the paper they are written on. Some are far and away cruel and savage things against some race or other, or some type of person or other.” Phoebe shrugs. “We keep them to learn how not to be. Anyone can read them, but it is emphasized that they are not to be heeded. We don’t let hate fester on our shores."

"I mean, you have to have had shitty  _ people _ , rather than books, wash up on the beach from time to time. They couldn't all be winners."

Phoebe laughs at that. "Yes, that is true. Rarely does it happen. Some arrive here and act horribly. Their choice is to either change for the better, so that they might find a home here, or to pay us back in some way so that they may leave."

"You guys take that exchange pretty seriously, huh?" Chloe taps the feathery bit of the quill on her chin. "From what I gather, at least."

Phoebe nods. "We must. If we are too lax with our resources, we will perish. It takes much to build a new boat. If we have not received something from who needs the boat, we will operate at a loss that jeopardizes our survival."

"I understand. I appreciate that you don't just say "too bad, you're here forever now". I'm not one for a sedentary life." Chloe has her apartment as a sort of hub for her travels, but she gets antsy if she's home for more than a month. Being forced to stay on the island would have been unbearable.

With a chuckle, Phoebe smiles. "That would make the island a hostile place. Those who feel trapped lash out. Those who choose to stay find their place easily. I have seen it many times."

Chloe frowns. She had lashed out last night. It's got to do with feeling trapped, certainly. She does feel that way more than she’d liked to admit. And much of it probably is her inability to walk without an aide; exploring the island could be fun, after all. But she knows that the time they've been on the island is already too much. She wants to move, to follow the horizon, to explore things that haven't been seen for hundreds of years. She wants to find lost treasure, and she wants to have new experiences. She’s a legend in her business. She wants to slow down when  _ she's _ ready to, and not a second earlier.

No, life in this little village is not for her.

"Please don't take this the wrong way, but I don't think I have a place here."

Phoebe dips her head a bit and lets out a soft hum. "It is not hard to see you feel that way. I'm sure it does not help that you have a difficult time walking most days." She looks around the room. “You do seem happier here, surrounded by books. Could you not find a place in the library?”

Chloe shrugs. “Maybe if I had full use of my legs. But even then, staying in one place for too long… It’s not for me. Boredom is damn near physically painful. I need to-- I need to keep going. I don’t like stopping. Even if it’s a nice island with good people.” She looks back down at her page. She’d been describing a fantastical landscape. “There’s a lot of the world left to see.”

“Well, you’ve seen more than I. My travelling is done by the books we keep here.”

“Ah. That was me while I was young. And then I discovered boys. And girls. People, really. But my grades stayed up, so my mum was none the wiser.” She snorts. “Well, actually, I still read a lot. It was the only escape when I was trapped at home.”

Phoebe frowns. She doesn’t seem to like the concept. “It seems a strange thing, to be trapped in your home.”

Chloe casually waves her off. “Eh, had a crappy childhood. But I made it out, so it doesn’t really matter anymore.”

Phoebe seems thoughtful as she considers that. “I believe that is why I am comfortable remaining here, among other reasons. It seems there is much to be desired in the world out there. The stories I’ve heard don’t incline me towards wanting to leave. Parenting, for one, often seems to leave children wanting.”

“Hm. Suppose I can understand that, with what I’ve heard from Tessa and Taliza. War from one, parents who treated her poorly because she wasn’t the right gender from the other… I’m sure you’ve met others with even worse. My mother, well, she simply didn’t like that I like women as well as men. I’ll spare you the whole story.” Chloe rolls her shoulders and stretches. “I haven’t been in a place like that for a long time. There are just as many good people out there as there are bad. I’ve met a lot of them on either side.”

“I am certain there are. I simply prefer the life I have here. I have certainty, I have family, and I have the ability to help those around me. I need little else.”

“I guess I get that. But I need the travel. A little bit of uncertainty is good. What’s life without chance?” She rolls her shoulders. “I’m pretty lax about that. I like a bit of improvisation when something goes wrong. I don’t go as crazy as I used to, but that’s because of Nadine. She prefers that I plan things out more often.”

She doesn’t mean to mention her. She’s trying to stay angry at Nadine, something that’s alternatingly easy and difficult. Nadine is overprotective of her, always has been, and Chloe knows this. But Nadine also knows Chloe doesn’t care for too much protection. Not in a safe place like this.

“She keeps you safe,” Phoebe says plainly.

Chloe scoffs. “Sure. I guess.”

“This annoys you?”

She waves her off. “She knows I can take care of myself. I survived a long time before I had her. Just gets to be a bit much sometimes.”

Chloe likes being protected, she simply wants acknowledgement she can handle things herself. There’s a difference between Nadine scaring off a man who’s harassing her-- something Chloe can handle but  _ likes  _ seeing Nadine handle-- and keeping Chloe from using her own legs because she tripped.

Phoebe shrugs. “Such is the struggle of those who are loved. Perhaps speaking with her might alleviate it. Give boundaries that are firm.”

Give Elena Greek accent and another foot of height and she and Phoebe might be the same person. “You sound like a friend of mine. She’s always giving me logical advice without realizing I was never built for it.”

“Your friend seems like she’s quite smart. And anyone is built for communication, given the right growth.”

Chloe laughs. “She is, but it doesn’t make it less annoying.” She follows the laugh with another sigh. “She would find all this fascinating, Elena would. Settle herself down here in the library and not come out for a week. Or maybe she’d get to know the people here. Either way she’d find this all terribly interesting.”

“Well, as you seem willing to leave, perhaps you can tell her about us.” Phoebe stands. “It has been nice speaking to you, Chloe. Stay here as long as you like. I must get to my duties.”

“Have fun,” Chloe says by way of parting.

* * *

Nadine is seated on a rock, watching the sheep she’s led out to pasture. She’s never thought of herself as a shepherd, but she rather enjoys this job. It’s helping her relax, at least. She loves being out with the animals.

Her mind keeps slipping to the fact Chloe is angry with her. She doesn’t want to think about it right now. There are only so many ways she can think of to apologize to her and she’s been through a lot. If she was back home, she’d pick up a bottle of Chloe’s favourite wine to help smooth the process over. She’s done it before, to some effect. Chloe had seemed to appreciate it, at least.

No, Nadine will have to navigate this with nothing but her apology. She hopes Chloe will listen. She hopes Chloe still wants to be with her. She hates that her mind jumps to that, but it’s an anxiety she’s had since  _ meeting  _ Chloe that Chloe will decide Nadine isn’t worth her time.

Her anxieties have been a confusing mix of worse and better on the island. Back home, she’d taken medicine to keep it under control. It’s still in her system, with the type it is, but the longer she’s on the island, the more anxious she seems to get.

The island itself doesn’t make her anxious though. If anything it drops her anxiety from how relaxed it is. The people here are the good sort. She gets no questions about her past here. No one asks about her scars or judges her for loving a woman. This island is pleasant. She’s yet to face homophobia, transphobia, or anything dealing with hatred like that. It’s refreshing. She wasn’t sure a place like this could exist.

Despite it all, she still wants to go home. And, well, maybe that’s as easy as apologizing to Chloe. Chloe has been her steadfast source of comfort in the time they’ve been partners. She might just be home to Nadine.

One of the sheep wanders over to her and lays in the grass beside her. Delighted, she pats its head.

The sheep here seem to be doing well with no natural predators on the island. They act a bit different than what she’s read on sheep behaviours at least. Less anxiety away from their herd, likely because there are no wolves to prey on them, or foxes or coyotes to pick off the lambs. The only thing killing sheep here is the occasional decision to use one for food by the people here. It seems mostly to keep the population of sheep from being too big. Otherwise, they’re used for wool and milk.

Nadine enjoys the friendliness of the animals she’s caring for. She’s always kind of liked the idea of running a farm. She had been born into a military family, surely, but in another life, she would have been around animals more. A zookeeper, maybe, or a rancher, or something.

Nadine used to be embarrassed to have these kinds of fantasies, but now she can’t find it in herself to be. If there’s anything Chloe has taught her, it’s to be proud of what makes her who she is. Chloe doesn’t judge her for, well, her. Nadine appreciates that.

It’s a temptation for her, now, to perhaps act on an impulse to somehow get a small farm when they go back. All they need is one good haul and she could buy herself a little piece of land somewhere. It might require a more sedentary lifestyle, but they can’t keep this adventuring thing up forever. Eventually, Nadine will want to slow down.

Not yet, though.

Right now, Nadine wouldn’t mind going somewhere new. She’s certain Chloe can find them a job near as soon as they get back to the mainland. They won’t be able to do anything with it, not until Chloe’s ankle is healed. Her ribs too. Nadine wants Chloe to be ready to go, not hiding her pain just so she can move about. At the very least, the ribs should heal before her ankle does.

“Nadine!”

Nadine starts. “Lindiwe. I didn’t expect you here today.”

The girl grins at her. “I finished my chores early, and my school work. I wanted to come see you again!”

“How’s your school work going?”

“I still don’t like maths. I’m good at it though. It’s not as fun as languages or history.” Lindiwe plops herself down next to the dozing sheep and leans on it. “It is not as fun as the stuff you and Chloe tell us, though.” Her fingers are gripping the sheep’s wool. “Is she coming back tonight? To the library?”

Nadine doesn’t know how to answer that. She might? She hasn’t said anything? She decides on the truth. It’s usually the best option. “I don’t know.”

“Well, is she feeling better?”

It’s another question Nadine can’t really answer. “I’m not sure. She hasn’t told me.”

“You didn’t ask?” The girl’s tone isn’t judgemental, just curious.

“Chloe wanted privacy today and some time to be on her own. I’m letting her have that.”

“Oh. Okay. I hope she does show up. Urvi wants to keep writing the stories she tells. She lets them draw little scenes that go with.”

Nadine can’t help but nod. “I want her to go too, laatlammetjie.”

They sit in the quiet, or mostly quiet, as Lindiwe is talking to the sheep she’s leaning on, switching languages as much as the moon switches phases.

Nadine’s mind is back to Chloe, as it seems to be so often. Chloe is never an afterthought though. Rather, she is a constant. Nadine’s thoughts change but Chloe is the constant that affects them. Nadine isn’t sure when that became the norm, but it certainly is now.

Nadine still wonders if she should find where Chloe’s gone. She’d asked Taliza that morning when she’d seen her in passing. The woman had no clue. Nadine hadn’t really run into anyone else that would outright know where Chloe was. Everyone seems to  _ know  _ of them, though. They’re the new faces on the island still.

“Do you love Chloe?”

The question interrupts Nadine’s thoughts and she doesn’t quite catch it. “What?”

“Do you love Chloe?”

“... I do.” Nadine isn’t really sure why she hesitates. She’s known this for a bit now.

“Do you tell her? My parents say it to each other all the time. They’re really mushy.”

“I… haven’t yet. No. Not really.”

Lindiwe makes a face. “You should. My parents say you should always tell people you love that you love them. They tell me they love me a lot too.”

Nadine can’t help but chuckle. “That sounds very good. I tell my pops I love him every time I see him. He tells me too.”

“But you should with Chloe too.” Lindiwe is playing with the sheep’s ears. “My mother says there is no limit to love in the world, so you may as well say it.”

Nadine intends to tell Chloe at some point. Well, tell her when she’s awake. She simply doesn’t want to taint it with their argument and risk Chloe thinking she’s using it as a weapon against her. It needs to be more than that. Chloe needs to know she means it. After all, Chloe isn’t great with emotions. They both know that. Nadine is still learning herself.

“What brought this train of thought?”

“I was thinking about how I love this sheep’s ears.”

With a laugh, Nadine nods. “I understand, I suppose.”

“... What are trains like?”

Nadine can only laugh again. Before she starts describing trains, that is. She’s certain Lindiwe will enjoy the fact she was nearly on one when it crashed. The girl enjoys her stories and she has no issue telling them.

It’s a good distraction for Nadine, past the sheep. Even though many of Nadine’s stories include Chloe, she still enjoys recounting them for Lindiwe’s benefit.

* * *

It’s getting late. Chloe still hasn’t left the library. At this point, she may as well stay here until Nadine and the children show up. Phoebe had stopped in to bring her more food earlier.

Chloe has quite a bit of her new journal filled. The stories might not be excellent, but she likes them. At the very least, these stories are good. She still needs practice, but she’ll keep trying as she goes.

Today feels as if it’s flown by. Chloe doesn’t feel quite as restless despite sitting here all day. She’s not sure if it was the long walk to get here that calmed her down or the fact she’s kept herself distracted.

Chloe has fallen into missing Nadine rather than being angry with her. She’s decided she’s got a few things to say to the woman, including an apology for snapping at her. But she’s definitely going to try this whole communication deal again. It’s helped her in the past. She’s just… stubborn. And maybe a little tired of being angry at the moment.

Her last story or two has had a knight in shining armour type character that always seems to bear a striking resemblance to Nadine. There’s no way Chloe is going to let Nadine see those stories, but oh well. She’ll have to leave the book behind when they leave. That was the intention anyway.

Chloe doesn’t want to think of the chance of Nadine not wanting to leave the island, so she doesn’t. It’s her stubbornness at play again. She’ll face that problem when she has to and not a moment before. It having occurred to her at all is bad enough.

Chloe delves into her stories again. Her quill moves quickly and she’s well distracted for the next hour. It’s because of her investment in what she’s writing that she’s startled when her voice is spoken behind her.

“Chloe.”

Chloe turns to see Nadine standing behind her. She looks nervous, almost meek. She’s got Chloe’s original journal in her hand.

“Nadine,” Chloe responds softly.

They’re both silent for a moment. Eventually, Nadine takes a seat beside her. She gives Chloe some space as well. Chloe appreciates the thought, but she wants to get back in Nadine’s arms.

But that requires talking, she supposes.

“Hey, china, I…” She sighs. She really isn’t built for this. “I’m sorry I snapped at you.”

Nadine is quick to shake her head. “No, I’m sorry I pushed too hard. I’m just… I’m worried about you. But I know you’ve been feeling agitated since you can’t walk much.”

“I don’t…” She purses her lips. “I’m not sure that’s why I snapped at you, honestly.”

Just like that, Nadine seems anxious again. “There’s something else?”

Chloe sinks in on herself. She feels Nadine go to move closer but hold herself back. Lacking self-control, Chloe presses closer on her own. Nadine’s arms go around her and she feels a little better with just that.

Chloe still hesitates though.

“Chloe?” Nadine’s voice is soft.

With a huff, Chloe just shrugs. “I feel like you’re happier here than you were back home.” She frowns and won’t meet her partner’s eyes. “That’s-- Nadine, that scares me. Because I’m… I’m pretty sure you’ll go back just because I want to.”

“Chloe--”

“Let me finish! Please.”

Nadine goes silent. Her expression is filled with care and worry and, God, Chloe wants to stop talking about this and kiss her until she’s smiling again. But that can’t happen right now. They really do need to talk about this crap now, before it’s too late to do anything related to this island. To Parádeisos.

“I want you to be happy, Nadine. But I can’t stay here. And I want to be with you, but I also don’t want you leaving here just because of me.” Chloe can barely look at Nadine. “You just… You seem relaxed here. Like you… You’re smiling more. You seem… content. Like the life you’re having here is better than what you got at home.”

Nadine opens her mouth to respond but closes it again. She seems hesitant at least, regretful at most. Chloe doesn’t like the look of that.

But then Nadine blurts, “I don’t want to stay here.”

Already, Chloe feels a little better.

“I-- Chloe, I do like it here. I like the work I do. I like the people. But--” She cuts off with a sigh. “I could probably be happy here. No more than an animal hand or a fisher with no more strife. I… It’s something I could like.”

Chloe’s stomach drops.

“But… I don’t want to stay here.”

Chloe huffs. “You’re just… You’re going back and forth a lot, love, and I don’t know where we stand on that right now.”

Nadine purses her lips. “Jammer. I’m leaving with you.”

“I-- I don’t want you to do that if it’s just for me! I, I love you, Nadine, and I can’t be the reason you don’t stay in a place where you’re happy.” Chloe feels her face turn red as she realizes what she’d said, but she keeps talking past it, almost hoping Nadine doesn’t notice. “If you’re happy here, you shouldn’t feel obliged to go just because I want to.”

And Nadine, of course, has to catch what Chloe had said. She looks half amazed that Chloe had said it. “You love me?”

Chloe gives her an almost fearful look before nodding. “God help me, I do.”

Nadine breaks into a smile. “I love you too!”

Chloe suddenly feels much better than she had a few minutes ago, but she still needs to know some things.

“The rest of it though, China, the… I want you to be happy.”

Nadine looks panicked again. “I-- I am happy, Chloe. Eish, I… I am happy here. You’re right. But it isn’t the island. I could have a life similar to this anywhere. I want sheep? I’ll buy a farm. I want to fish? I’ll live near water. Yes, the people are good here, but I can find good people anywhere.” She reaches a hand towards Chloe but seems to think against it. Chloe darts a hand out and grabs it. She’s not letting Nadine get away from her.

The woman takes a deep breath and those lovely brown eyes look at Chloe again with so much affection Chloe can barely stand it.

“I’m leaving here with you, Chloe. You, you are why I’m happy.” She swears softly. “How do you not know that?”

“What?”

Nadine looks half-amused, like she can’t believe Chloe doesn’t get what she’s saying. “I’m with  _ you  _ here, Chloe. If you wanted to stay, I would stay. If you want to leave, I’m leaving. I don’t… really care where we go, as long as you’re there.”

Chloe feels like she’s about to cry. She’d been afraid she’s been forcing Nadine on the path towards leaving the island but… That doesn’t seem to be true. Nadine just wants to be with her.

“You’re sure?” she asks quietly. “You  _ do  _ want to leave?”

“I want to stay with you.” Nadine shrugs and gives her that too sweet smile again. “I know where I’m happy. I’m staying with you, Chloe. I love you and… the rest doesn’t really matter, does it?”

Chloe’s mind goes blank. She pushes herself into Nadine’s arms and hangs on with all her might. All the arguing of the past day has been so utterly stupid. Maybe this communication thing works because-- well, Nadine had just said  _ that _ . Chloe never wants to forget it.

She’ll have to write it down.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!


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